Instant Messenger
by PsychoBarbie
Summary: A nice messenger chat with WWE imposters became her way of escape. Cause that's all they were, Imposters... she wasn't that dense to think they were actually real, she just wanted to pretend and play along cuz that's what they were doing... Right?
1. ASL

Re-edited Sept. 30 2012

Title: Instant Messenger 1/?

Author: Music

Category:WWE

Rating: T for teen...cuz I like to swear.

Summary: A nice messenger chat with WWE imposters becomes her way for escape. Cause that's all they were, Imposters. she wasn't that dense, she just wanted to pretend and play along cuz that's what they were doing.. Right?

Disclaimer: the OC's belong to me… wrestlers belong to the WWE and/or themselves,

Spoilers: Randy is suspended, and I'll prolly just make it up as I go along

Feedback: Please

Author's Note: Ahem if this completely sucks, I'm blaming it on my feverish mind… I wrote this while sick. There is an explanation behind this story that I may perhaps share at a later date. I dreamed half of it… but that's how a lot of my fics start...and before people go on about another Randy story… SOOOO not my fault… My Randy Muse is running rampant and SOOOO not my fault… please tell me what you honestly think it's written in 1st person which I usually don't do… oh and this part is unbetaed…my poor girls internet is down.

… … …

So it's actually kinda weird how it all started. I got sick awhile back therefore I was stuck on bed rest for a while. My mother bought me a laptop to keep me occupied so I could continue to surf the web and it worked. I ended up meeting a lot of people, joining a lot of wrestling groups and just having fun and forgetting.

So one night I'm at my laptop when a friend comes on saying 'oh my god I'm actually talking to THE Randy Orton.' I chuckled at that. But nonetheless, I was invited to their messenger conversation and ended up adding him. Soon after I ended up adding various other "Superstars". Chris Masters, John Cena, Rey Mysterio, Christian Cage, Ashley, Torrie and Trish Stratus. They all had messenger names that were the first or last name followed by their birthdays, something that would make them seem really legit. I dunno why, I just added them for the fun of it. I started off talking to Randy, John, and Ashley the most, and when I refer to them, you got to remember that I'm referring to them as being imposters, I think I believed it was them for all of 2 seconds until I stopped myself and was like wait a sec, when would they ever have time to chat on messenger, it just didn't add up. During one big group conversation though, I had my speakers on when Randy talked but I brushed it off, how hard is it too pick up a recording and replay it? It was fuzzy at best so I couldn't hear it properly. Sure it sounded like Randy but again with the fuzzy recording.

I didn't really think much of it, When they were on I talked to them, and they weren't stupid, they didn't come on when they were supposedly on TV or had house shows or appearances, they knew all the news, but so did I. But they were fun to talk to, especially with my illness; it was something I could get into and just have fun with.

You see, when I said I was sick, I meant I was _Sick._ I had Cancer. Acute myeloid leukemia to be exact. It wasn't lethal, we had caught it in the early stages so it was easily fixable but that also meant I still had to go through the Chemotherapy treatments to make it easily fixable and they were hell, pure hell. During treatments, I would get so sick that I would disappear from the net for days at a time. I was an out-patient at the hospital so I went home in between treatments. My internet friends would always ask me if I was okay and I would tell them I was, I just had real life stuff to deal with, no biggie and they always accepted it. I didn't want them to start acting weird around me, not like the people who used to surround me and claimed to be my friends.

Besides being sick, and distancing myself from everyone I used to know, I lost my hair. My long dark red hair that I had loved so much. I had a Catheter put in my chest to administer the drugs so they didn't have to keep finding a vein and I hated it, it was ugly and along with the hair loss the weight loss and that stupid thing in my chest I felt ugly. I just felt awful and when I was well enough I'd go online to have some solace from the physical, emotional, and mental pain I was constantly in.

After one of my treatments where I was away longer than last time, I came back online, ready to catch up. I had just read that Orton had been suspended and was ranting about that to some friends when a message appeared.

**Randy: Hey sweetheart, where have you been?**

I smiled as this was the first time he had started a conversation with me. I usually spoke to them first.

**Wannabe Diva: Dealing with real life, you know how it gets.**

**Randy: everything Okay?**

**Wannabe Diva: Of course why wouldn't it be?**

**Randy: Just making sure. So what's new?**

**Wannabe Diva: Nothing actually. Just at home checking on my mail.**

**Randy: Don't you work during the day? Lol**

**Wannabe Diva: No fair! :P you don't work during the day. At least not always. But I'm…. in between jobs.**

**Randy: Lol.. ooohhhh canned from the last place huh?**

**Wannabe Diva: Nah I quit couldn't take it anymore.**

**Randy: So what do you do now?**

**Wannabe Diva: Exactly what you see me doing now. Lol. And what are you doing now? Huh? What's this I read about a suspension?**

**Randy: :p okay now you're getting mean.**

**Wannabe Diva: -looks innocent- Moi? Mean? Hmm from all the rumors I've been hearing, I'm not the mean one.**

**Randy: well you're learning to be mean but I guess I deserved that.**

**Wannabe Diva: But I gotta say you've been pretty nice to me. So either you've quickly changed or I'm just special, or….**

**Randy: Or what?**

**Wannabe Diva: Nothing. I should probably go, I'm not feeling to well.**

**Randy: What's wrong? **

**Wannabe Diva: nothing.**

**Randy: Is that your favorite word? Lol.**

**Wannabe Diva: Sometimes. I got others but that's for me to know and you to find out. I'll talk to you later okay.**

**Randy: Okay sweetheart, take it easy. I miss talking to you. –Hugs-**

**Wannabe Diva: -hugs-, miss talking to you too. I should be on again regularly, so hopefully you'll be around.**

**Randy: well I'm just working out and doing some training but other than that not much here. Talk to you when you're on. **

Oh he was good. Working out and training? I rolled my eyes and gave a small chuckle but thought no more of it.

I talked to him again a few days later. I was online when he came on and was the first one to speak this time. There was nothing special about our conversation. He just asked how I was feeling, I asked how he was doing with the suspension and I sent him a graphic that I had made of him. He wrote back saying it was awesome and asked if he could keep it. I told him of course it was no big deal to me. He left soon after telling me he was headed down to the gym and would speak to me later.

Next time we were both online, I was finishing up a graphic for one of my online groups when he messaged me.

**Randy: So why is it that for weeks at a time you always seem to be on then you seem to just disappear for periods of time.**

**Wannabe Diva: Keeping tabs on me Randy Orton?**

**Randy: Nah I've just noticed that a couple times. How come a pretty girl like you isn't out living it up?**

**Wannabe Diva: -Blushes- Pretty?**

**Randy: Yes, I like your picture. How come you're not out with your boyfriend?**

The picture he was referring to was an old picture taken before I got sick. I was a lot plumper then. I sometimes swore I was only half of what I used to be. I never took pictures anymore. As for the boyfriend, when I got sick, I moved back home and he wasn't happy about it. We ended up breaking up and to be honest it didn't bug me. I was sick, I didn't want him looking after me, I wanted him to go out and have fun and live, something that was temporarily put on hold for me.

**Wannabe Diva: Who said anything about a boyfriend? -raises eyebrow-**

**Randy: I would just assume that you would have one, I think you look really good.**

**Wannabe Diva: Thanks but I'm single I broke up with my bf not too long ago.**

**Randy: Idiot.**

**Wannabe Diva: excuse me?**

**Randy: Him, for letting you go.**

**Wannabe Diva: I do declare, Randy Orton, are you flirting with me ;)**

**Randy: and is that so bad? :p….**

**Wannabe Diva: I'll get back to you on that.**

**Randy: so why did you guys break up?**

**Wannabe Diva: boring story. We were together, I got bored, he got bored, wanted to live my own life, so I told him it was done and moved back in with my mom.**

**Randy: Ouch, that can't be easy.**

**Wannabe Diva: It actually was, I'm over it and I enjoy being with my family again.**

**Randy: That's good I'm glad for you then.**

**Wannabe Diva: Thank you.**

**Randy: Anymore of those cool graphic thingies?**

**Wannabe Diva: Do you think I actually sit here making graphics of you all day…. I'll let you know I sometimes make other Wrestlers too. ;p**

**Randy: pouts does that mean no?**

**Wannabe Diva: Aww poor baby.. lol… hold on lemme see what I can dig out…..**

**Wannabe Diva: I can't find any decent ones I'll make you a pretty new one. So I gotta ask you, you ask me about my bf how come you're not enjoying your time off with your gf?**

**Randy: I don't have one.**

**Wannabe Diva: See now that I find hard to believe.**

**Randy: it's true, it's hard to have one on the road.**

**Wannabe Diva: No doubt. –yawn- I think it's time for me to sleep.**

**Randy: will you be on tomorrow?**

**Wannabe Diva:…I guess, I'm usually on all day. I'll ttyl.**

**Randy: bye sweetheart –hugs-**

I signed off a little confused, I mean usually when I talk to the guy, it's in a big group conversation sometimes one on one just whenever we were both around. But now my fake Randy was looking to talk to me checking to make sure I would be online. This brought a smile to my face. Please don't ask me why, I think it had to do with having a guy actually want to talk to me. Most of my online buddies were girls and none of them knew I was sick, hell, very few friends did, except my cousin who didn't live too far and would come visit on some of my stronger days. Of all my old friends, and I counted my cousin as my best friend, Danni was the only one I continued talking too and I was okay with that.

Unfortunately I was too weak the next day to do much else then lie in bed watching my Buffy DVD's. I had my good days and my bad days. I had to be extra careful, although the Chemo was getting rid of the cancer it was also affecting my ability to fight colds, I had to be careful not to overexert myself for fear of getting any type of infection as it could be deadly and I had fought so hard I wasn't going to let a simple cold come along and put me in danger.

"Sweetie, someone keeps messaging you on your laptop."

I slightly turned my head to see my mom in the doorway holding my laptop.

"Who?" I softly asked.

"Randy?"

I sighed, remembering I had told him I would be online today.

"Tell him I'm not here, that I went out with a friend."

She gave me a concerned look, knowing that none of my online friends knew what the real deal with me was and I preferred to keep it that way.

"Are you sure sweetheart?"

"Yes," I replied my eyes turning back to the screen. Fake or not I didn't want his pity.

I wasn't well enough to go back on for another couple days and when I did Randy wasn't online but John Cena was.

**John: hey girl how you been?**

**Wannabe Diva: Fine, what's up?**

**John: Not much just wanted to make sure you're okay. Orton is worried about you.**

I rolled my eyes. Let me guess, the same guy pretended to be both of them? Cause really, I'm sure Randy Orton and John Cena sit around talking about how some online fan wasn't online when she said she would be. How dense did they think I was?

**Wannabe Diva: ahh sorry about that. Have been busy. Tell him I'm okay and will talk to him later.**

**John: I just did.**

**Wannabe Diva: Excuse me?**

**John: I just called him and told him, he said not to go anywhere he'll be online. And now I gotta get going.**

**Wannabe Diva: Of course. **

**John: What?**

**Wannabe Diva: Nothing. Good luck on your upcoming match.**

He signed off and I waited a good couple minutes when lo and behold guess who signed on.

**Wannabe Diva: Worried about me Orton?**

**Randy: Well you said you would be on.**

**Wannabe Diva: Lol sorry real life.**

**Randy: Look I really hate to ask this but have you told me your name before?**

**Wannabe Diva: Possibly…**

**Randy: Well?**

**Wannabe Diva: oh would you like to know? :P it's Lana….**

**Randy: Nice name**

**Wannabe Diva: I try.**

**Randy: So why are you just a wannabe?**

**Wannabe Diva: Cause I'm not a wrestler or even a Diva just a wannabe…**

**Randy: Why, you want to be one?**

**Wannabe Diva: At one point I did.**

**Randy: Why not now?**

**Wannabe Diva: Trust me I won't make it now.**

**Randy: Don't say that. If you want it you can get it.**

**Wannabe Diva: I know. I want it but there are too many obstacles.**

**Randy: Like what?**

**Wannabe Diva: Like stuff. You're nosy.**

**Randy: Sorry I get that a lot but if you want it, go for it. Don't let anything stop you. And just so you know OVW is the best.**

**Wannabe Diva: blah blah blah, you sound like my therapist.**

**Randy: Therapist? -raises eyebrow-**

**Wannabe Diva: Yes haven't you heard, all the cool kids have one now.**

**Randy: Interesting…**

**Wannabe Diva: well what's this I read about you seeing someone for your "problem" would that be a therapist or anger management.**

**Randy: Ouch.**

**Wannabe Diva: Sorry I didn't mean it like that…**

**Randy: I know, but I gotta go, I'll talk to you later.**

**Wannabe Diva: Don't be mad, that came out all wrong.**

**Randy: I'm not, I swear. I'll talk to you later Lana. –hugs-**

**Wannabe Diva: ok night randy.**

I signed off feeling bad. Okay I know he wasn't Randy but I still felt bad for saying that. I have this nasty habit of speaking and then thinking. It's not good but I'm not as bad as I used to be thank god but I still wasn't perfect. Oh come on, no one is.

… … ...


	2. BRB

Re-edited Sept. 30 2012

Chapter 2

... ... ...

It seems the next little while we kept missing each other online. At first I worried that he was mad at me but then once in a while, I would log on and there would be a message from him.

**Randy: Lana where have you been? I miss talking to you. Hope you're on soon –hugs-**

I always replied back to him saying sorry I missed him and hoping he would be on next time I was but I did however, talk to others. Once I spoke with John who asked how I was, another time Chris Masters and Ashley. All three mentioned that Randy was wondering how I was and how mad he was he kept missing me. I stopped to think here. What the hell was going on? Was some geek out there, having some kind of thing for me, while he pretended to be all these Superstars?

Well gee, if he was going by my picture he would sure be in for a surprise. I don't even know why he would be going by that picture anyway. I'm not hideous but not your everyday Diva. Not like the ones on TV. Not someone you'd think Randy Orton fake or not would go for. I'm sure the fake one could get as many girls as he wanted.. all the groupies who wanted a piece of fame would be right there, thinking he had an in with the real Randy, so why was he bugging me?

I guess I can't really say bugging, cause I did enjoy talking to them. It was like being in my own little fantasy world, one where I was just Lana Mitchell and not the girl with cancer, not the little sick girl. I got to be me and only me. They only saw me and knew me as Lana. Was that too much to ask of the rest of the world?

… … …

Chemo sucks. I'll tell you that now, I had just finished off another round and was at home, sick and praying the pain would go away and I'm not your praying kind of girl. I noticed that each time I seemed to be sick just a little bit longer. I told my mom who reminded me that my immune system was low and it was probably just taking a while for my body to recover. Okay fine, didn't mean I had to like it.

I'd gone back to wearing my glasses now. They were only for driving or when my eyes were tired which were now all the time, I was so sick of the nausea and vomiting, I was so sick of the clumps of hair coming out that I finally begged my mom to cut it all off. She did and she cried as I did my best to remain strong but she promised to buy me wigs whenever I was up to going out. After that I did something I hadn't done since I started Chemo, I looked in the mirror, I mean really looked in the mirror and that's when I broke down. I didn't even recognize myself anymore. I returned to my room and curled up around my laptop wanting to get lost in my fantasy world. It was the first time since I returned home from Chemo and I found a lot of messages from Randy.

**Randy: hey sweetheart, guess I missed you again, hope to see you soon.**

**Randy: -hugs- hope you're doing well Lana miss talking to you.**

**Randy: You pulled your disappearing act again, didn't you? Off for some secret rendezvous? lol**

**Randy: I'm kinda worried, no one has seen you online. Just write back when you get this.**

I sighed. How cute, I worried the poor faker. Yeah I know I was in a grouchy mood. But nevertheless, I wrote back to him.

**Wannabe Diva: Sorry real life gets in the way…can't be helped.**

I pressed send and almost immediately I got a reply. Ah I guess he was hiding from someone in invisible mode

**Randy: You're back.**

**Wannabe Diva: Who ya hiding from?**

**Randy: No one. I've just been waiting for you to come on.**

**Wannabe Diva: Wait wait wait, so who should be stalking who?**

**Randy: -pouts- this isn't stalking just concern for a friend.**

**Wannabe Diva: -raises eyebrow- friend? You don't even know me.**

**Randy: But I'd like to get to know you more. You're fun to talk to.**

**Wannabe Diva: Not always.**

**Randy: What's wrong?**

**Wannabe Diva: who said anything about something being wrong?**

**Randy: You're acting funny.**

**Wannabe Diva: Perhaps this is how I always act, can you say you know me well enough to know?**

**Randy: -frowns- I thought perhaps I did, I just KNOW this isn't you. What's wrong Lana?**

**Wannabe Diva: Nothing.**

**Randy: ahh your favorite word again.**

**Wannabe Diva: It has nothing to do with my favorite word. I said there was nothing wrong. Deal with it. Look my mom's calling me I have to go.**

**Randy: Lana wait….**

I signed off, put my head on my pillow and sobbed. It wasn't fair. Here he was at the prime of his life enjoying life, whoever he was and here I was stuck at home sick, with cancer. It wasn't fair. Life wasn't fair.

… … …

"Sleeping again? Surprise, surprise."

I groaned, putting the pillow over my head as I snuggled in further.

"Ain't gonna happen, get outta bed."

I lifted a corner of the pillow and glared at my cousin Danni.

"Easier said than done."

"I'll help you, it's nice out just come get some fresh air for a bit."

Sighing I tossed the pillow aside and with the help of Danni, struggled out of bed, putting most of my weight against her.

"Damn." I heard her whisper.

"Too heavy?" I sarcastically asked.

She shook her head. "Quite the opposite." she murmured before smiling. "I think I could take you in a fight now."

"Hardee har har. Kick em while they're down. Why are you here? Shouldn't you be working?"

"I took the day off. Auntie Kim called me."

She put me down in the swinging porch seat and sat beside me as I looked at her warily wondering why mom had called her.

"She said you've been in your room the last little while crying."

"Have you seen my hair? Sorry, lack of hair?"

She looked at my head thoughtfully. "We can work with it. It's something more huh?"

I rolled my eyes.

"Who's Randy?"

I looked at her sharply."What?"

"Your mom mentioned something about some guy named Randy who is always messaging you that has no idea what is wrong with you."

"No one online does." I muttered, lifting my hand to tug on her brown tresses, a wave of sadness coming over me once more.

"So tell, who is he?"

"An imposter." I muttered.

She cocked her head to the side, Confused.

"You know the WWE, Randy Orton? A little while ago my friend came across some WWE Superstars on Messenger and she gave me their addresses and their fun to talk to once in a while. It's like being in my own little fantasy world. And well Randy decided he likes talking to me."

She was quiet for a few moments as we watched a little boy on a bike ride by.

"What if it is him?"

I laughed but it soon turned into coughing. Damn if my throat wasn't always dry now. After the coughing fit and a drink Danni handed me, I sat back.

"You think it's the real thing? When would they actually have time to go on?"

"Have you ever seen them online when they should be on TV?"

I shook my head.

"So how do you know?"

"Danni, the idea is ludicrous, It's insane. Impossible."

"You don't know that."

I rolled my eyes, leaning heavily against the chair. "So did Mom call you over here to say my fakers might be real."

"She's worried about you Lan, we all are. You've isolated yourself and cut yourself off from all your friends."

"What friends?" I scathingly replied. "The ones who are afraid to come near me because they're stupid enough to think I'm contagious?"

"Oh Lana that's not true." Danni said placing an arm around me.

"So how come you're the only one I've talked to since this began?" I asked my lower lip trembling.

Danni sighed knowing I was right. "They're idiots then." She softly replied. "How come no one online knows?"

"They don't know me. They know me as Lana. Just Lana. Too them I'm not sick and they don't have to know. They can't see me. I can just be me, without their pity. I don't want their pity. I'm sick of everyone's pity."

"I understand."

"No you don't." I snapped, my blue eyes flashing as I turned to glare at her. "How can you understand?"

"You're right, I don't. but I get what you mean about the anonymity about the internet. If you don't want to tell anyone you don't have to."

I smiled at her. "Thanks Danni. I just can't deal with their pity I'm tired of being pitied."

We rested our heads against one another as we looked out to the road.

"I know." She quietly replied.

… … …

**Randy: Why are you mad at me?**

It was a few days after Danni's visit and I was feeling well enough to go online for longer periods of time and without being sick. I guess someone thought I was mad at him.

**Wannabe Diva: Sigh, I'm not mad at you Randy.**

**Randy: you sure seemed like it last time.**

**Wannabe Diva: Sorry I was in a bad mood and I wasn't feeling well.**

**Randy: I'm sorry.**

**Wannabe Diva: Don't apologize, I should be saying sorry. I shouldn't have been so rude.**

**Randy: Don't worry about it.**

**Wannabe Diva: but I am. I felt really bad, if anything you should be mad at me.**

**Randy: I couldn't be mad at you.**

**Wannabe Diva: Why?**

**Randy: You're too adorable to be mad at.**

**Wannabe Diva: -Blushes- Please don't tell me you're going by that picture.**

**Randy: -raises eyebrow- What's wrong with that picture? I like that picture.**

**Wannabe Diva: I don't. 'sides wanna hear a secret? That's an old picture.**

**Randy: Well let's see a new one.**

**Wannabe Diva: ummm how bout… NO.**

**Randy: pouts No fair.**

**Wannabe Diva: Lol I betcha look adorable when you pout.**

Oh Lord was I flirting with him? Dammit Lana what the hell is wrong with you? I silently scolded myself.

**Randy: You can always come and find out :p**

**Wannabe Diva: -rolls eyes- sure buy me a plane ticket to St. Louis.**

**Randy: Perhaps I will one day, if you're good.**

**Wannabe Diva: Rrrriiiiiiggghhhhttttt…. Whatever you say.**

**Randy: you don't believe me?**

**Wannabe Diva: I should warn you I'm a crazy stalker person.**

**Randy: -smirks- I think I can handle you.**

**Wannabe Diva: Oh lord he's even smirking on here**

**Randy: I haven't found an emoticon to do that yet.**

**Wannabe Diva: Heaven forbid the day they do. I will never get rest from that ;p**

**Randy: You're mean.**

**Wannabe Diva: Says the top Heel wrestler…. If you could see I'm rolling on my bed laughing that Randy Orton is all upset about a poor little mean girl.**

**Randy: On your bed hey?**

**Wannabe Diva: Mind outta the gutter.**

**Randy: Still wouldn't mind seeing you.**

**Wannabe Diva: so when are you coming back? **

**Randy: Soon. And way to change the subject**

**Wannabe Diva: ;p you excited? And all fixed?**

**Randy: Yes and yes but I don't think I was broken.**

**Wannabe Diva: hmm okay…. Is your ego still the size of Canada? And are you still gonna be mean to people backstage?**

**Randy: ouch you're blunt.**

**Wannabe Diva: It's one of my more endearing qualities.**

**Randy: I made some mistakes, I admit it, I got too full of myself. But I'm working on that.**

**Wannabe Diva: -pats Randy on the head- Good. I'm proud of you.**

**Randy: All I get is a pat on the head?**

**Wannabe Diva: Now you're just being needy.**

**Randy: So you think. So whatcha doing?**

**Wannabe Diva: What I always do.**

**Randy: Which would be…..**

**Wannabe Diva: Stuff :D…. what are you doing?**

**Randy: Stuff.**

**Wannabe Diva: you can't use the same thing against me. –pouts-**

**Randy: now I bet you look adorable when you pout.**

**Wannabe Diva: You wish, Jellyfish.**

**Randy: LMAO…Cute.**

**Wannabe Diva: well there is no denying it. **

**Randy: and so modest.**

**Wannabe Diva: HAHAHA okay Mr. Ego… How many times have you looked in the mirror?**

**Randy: today… last count was I think 27.**

**Wannabe Diva: I rest my case…. Randy my mom is calling me. I'll TTYL –hugs-**

**Randy: Okay –hugs- ttyl Lana be safe kay?**

My mom was really calling me as I had to take some meds but I didn't really want tell him that. Would you?


	3. GR8

Re-edited Sept. 30 2012

Chapter 3

… … …

**John: Hey girl, how ya doing? Lana right? **

**Wannabe Diva: yup I'm fine, you?**

**John: Not too bad. Just wanted to talk to you a bit more and get to know the girl who my boy seems so interested in.**

**Wannabe Diva: What is his fascination with me anyway?**

**John: Is this unwanted attention? **

**Wannabe Diva: Never said that, just wanna know why he is so fascinated with me.**

**John: You're different.**

**Wannabe Diva: -raises eyebrow- how so?**

**John: He says you don't talk to him like he's famous and some sex icon. You talk to him like he's a person.**

**Wannabe Diva: Well he is, isn't he?**

**John: Yeah but at shows, appearances, even on here, none of us are treated like that.**

**Wannabe Diva: So because I don't fawn all over you guys and giggle like some stupid fangirl who would drop her panties with one look from one of you guys, he likes me?**

**John: I do enjoy how you word it but it's not just that, perhaps you should be talking to him about it.**

Well gee wasn't I already talking to him? It is the same person is it not? Oh yeah I gotta play along. Wouldn't wanna ruin their little game. Okay it could be the drugs talking but I think I was finding all this to be a little annoying… I knew they were fake, they knew they were fake, should I really break their little hearts and tell them I know?

My messenger beeped saying a new contact came online. I looked, and yeah my eyes pretty much bugged out. I quickly checked to make sure I was not seeing things but at that moment I received two messages.

**John: he's online I guess you can ask him now.**

**Randy: hey Lans…how you doing sweetheart?**

I looked between the two messenger windows in confusion trying to find a viable excuse in my head. Okay either this guy had 2 computers or they were in fact 2 different people. I told Randy to hold on one minute and went back to my conversation with John.

**Wannabe Diva: Did you tell him I was on again?**

**John: yes we just happened to be talking on the phone. Let him know you were online. So now you can ask him.**

**Wannabe Diva: Ask him what?**

**John: about his fascination with you…**

**Wannabe Diva: Are you on crack? How about… No?**

**John: Why?**

**Wannabe Diva: you don't go up to ppl and ask why they like you… **

**John: Do it, tell me how it goes.. I'll ttyl…and he's right Lana. You are pretty cool to talk to.**

I rolled my eyes as he signed out. What the hell kind of game were they playing at here? What if I was some fan who just didn't get the concept that they were imposters. God they could be messing with my emotions and who'll end up hurt in all this? Me. That's who, I mean if I didn't know they were fake. But I do know… right?

**Randy: Sweetheart you gone?**

**Wannabe Diva: No I was just saying good bye to John.**

**Randy: You passed up talking to me so you could talk to him? I'm hurt.**

**Wannabe Diva: -Smirks- Jealous?**

**Randy: Oh Look at who's smirking now and why would I be jealous?**

**Wannabe Diva: I dunno you tell me.**

**Randy: tell you what?**

Oh god dare I? hmmm Perhaps I could ask him and blame the drugs. But wait he doesn't know there are drugs involved but, if it all blows up in my face I could play dumb after and say that there are meds I'm on for a cold. That would work. Wait a sec, why do I care again? Hello, Lana? Imposters? Does that ring a bell? Maybe the drugs were getting to me.

**Randy: Did I lose you again Sweetheart?**

**Wannabe Diva: Nah, just thinking.**

**Randy: What about?**

**Wannabe Diva: Something John said.**

**Randy: What did he say? Did he upset you?**

**Wannabe Diva: Calmness boy, he didn't say anything, well he did but nothing that upset me.**

**Randy: Well…?**

**Wannabe Diva: He says you're interested in me….**

I waited and waited with no reply back.

**Wannabe Diva: Randy?**

**Randy: Sorry sweetheart, I was just on the phone... with John…**

**Wannabe Diva: Why?**

**Randy: Cuz I told him to keep his mouth shut.**

**Wannabe Diva: What are we, in high school? Are you interested in me or not, and why?**

**Randy: I love talking to you… You're not like other people... who else would say what you just did… the whole high school thing and the bluntness. No one talks to me like that.**

**Wannabe Diva: I'm mean and blunt so you like me.**

**Randy: No, look this is coming out all wrong…**

**Wannabe Diva: -raises eyebrow- you think… ok before you say anything else.. Your interest in me is really sweet, but I don't think it's real or even possible.**

**Randy: Why would you say that?**

**Wannabe Diva: Why would you say you're interested in me?**

**Randy: Because I love talking to you. You talk to me like I'm a real person. You're funny, and charming and I find you absolutely adorable…**

Oh god this cannot be happening. No no no…. now what the hell was I going to do? Hello, does he not know this won't work? Does he think some kind of relationship would even be plausible? Oh yes I'm going to fall for him online to the point where I will be able to see past what a liar he was annd forget that he was pretending to be someone he wasn't. Yes, now there was a healthy relationship.

**Wannabe Diva: You don't even know me. You've never met me.**

**Randy: but I wouldn't mind getting to know you.**

**Wannabe Diva: Stop it, you're talking crazy talk.**

**Randy: Why? Look all I'm asking is for a chance to get to know you better. I'm not asking you to marry me, or hell, even go out with me. I'm just asking to get to know you better.**

**Wannabe Diva: And you plan on doing that how exactly?**

**Randy: exactly what we're doing now, and if I ever have an appearance up there, or a show, maybe hanging out. Is that too much to ask?**

An appearance or show? Seriously? Who was he kidding? I can see right now how that will go. There I am waiting in line at a signing waiting and waiting then, oh here I am at the front of the line with Randy in front of me.

"Hey Randy."

"Hi." He says as he signs my picture.

"Randy, it's me Lana."

He pauses as he looks up at me, recognition not shining in his eyes at all.

"Well hello Lana, it's nice to meet you."

"No Randy, it's me Lana. Remember? We talk online all the time."

"When would I have time to talk online?" The real Randy asks me as I walk away a crestfallen look on my face as I look like a complete idiot to every single person in line who was laughing at me as well as the real Randy Orton. Genius.

**Wannabe Diva: oh geez….**

**Randy: What?**

**Wannabe Diva: Nothing, I'm thinking….**

**Randy: About what?**

**Wannabe Diva: Nothing… gotta go.**

**Randy: lana, please don't do this, just talk to me…**

I nervously chewed my lip. See I enjoyed talking to them it was fun and like I've said it's great being in my own little fantasy world. One where I'm not the little bald cancer girl but Lana, I can be whoever I want to be. I could say whatever I wanted to say… not that I did, I just held stuff back.

**Wannabe Diva: Randy, what's my last name? my age? Where do I live? What's my favorite color? How tall am I? Besides the pic of my face what do I look like? DO I have any siblings? Can you answer me any of these questions?**

**Randy: Your name is Lana Mitchell, your 22, you live in BC though I don't know what city. That's all I can answer, that's all you've put down in your profile but that's why I want to get to know you better.**

**Wannabe Diva: Then how can you say your interest in me is valid.**

**Randy: Lana, it's just that interest. Why are you making this so difficult?**

**Wannabe Diva: If I could explain I would but I can't and I gotta go…. Good-bye Randy.**

I quickly signed off and laid down on my bed staring up at the ceiling. This make believe stuff was starting to become all too real.

… … …

Guess what time it is everybody. Yup it was about that time again. Another awesome bout of fun filled Chemotherapy that has left me retching, weak, and just wanting to be put out of my misery. I never understood why something that is supposed to make you feel a lot better makes you feel a whole lot worse before you get better, if it even works at all. There was always that chance that my body wouldn't react to the Chemo. There's always that chance. There were other options but Chemo is your best chance first and foremost.

Coming home from Chemo, I of course was weak as a newborn so was bed ridden for a while. One of those days happening to be a Monday. And we all know what that means right? RAW baby. I was so not missing out on my wrestling. I had some catching up to do.

Okay so the catching up part didn't work so well on account of me drifting in and out of sleep. I woke up at one part just as Kurt Angle came out. A new ECW draftee from what I learned and he was issuing an open invitation for anyone for the One Night Stand PPV. Since Edge and Mick were out there with him I assumed it would be one of them. But no, the crowd noise changed and I gasped as I sat up and looked behind Kurt. Lo and behold but who was jumping in the ring but the Legend Killer himself, Randy Orton. He was back, oh my god he was back. If I had the energy I would've been jumping up and down, screaming. God how I've missed him. The real him. I must've let out some kind of celebratory noise because my door was pushed open and my mom rushed in.

"What's wrong?" She cried looking panicked.

Did I mention my mom was very protective of me now?

"Nothing." I said, looking back to the TV. "Randy Orton is back."

"Randy? That boy you were talking to online?"

I rolled my eyes "no mom. Randy Orton is a wrestler, online Randy is an imposter. But can I have my laptop?"

"Are you okay to go on it?" She asked eyeing me nervously.

"Yes it'll only be for a minute." I assured her.

She handed it to me and hovered over me while I turned it on, only leaving when I sent her a pointed look.

I know this is hard to believe but I had messages when I went online.

**Randy: Please Lana don't leave-Okay your gone. Why did I scare you so much? Is it that bad wanting to get to know you? Can you please just talk to me?**

**Randy: sweetheart have you even come online yet?**

**Randy: Either you're really mad or you pulled your disappearing act again. Where do you go? I just really hope you're not mad.**

**John: Hey girl. Randy wants to know if you're mad at him. if you're not talking to him at least let me know.**

**Trish: Hey Lana, Randy is getting me to try now and see if you're okay.**

**Randy: What's going on? Can you at least tell me if you're not talking to me?**

Wow everyone was involved now. At least I wouldn't have to talk to them, they were all at Raw.

**Wannabe Diva: Randy I am still talking to you I just had some personal problems to deal with. Sorry to freak you out. Please tell both John and Trish that I'm okay as well and thanks for their concern even if they were just checking for you…and I can't believe you're on Raw and you didn't even message that part to me ;p**

How far was this guy willing to take it, how far was I?

… … …

"Princess? You're messenger is going off again." My mom said coming into my room with my laptop. "It's that Randy boy again."

I lifted my head, motioning for my laptop which she placed in front of me.

**Randy: Sorry babe. It was a last minute decision by management. They've decided I've done the time and would like to see the match between Kurt and I before he becomes exclusive ECW.**

"Are you okay to type, Princess?"

I nodded at my mom. "I'm a bit slow but I should be okay, I'll call you when I'm done."

She nodded leaving the room and I typed out a slow reply, writing that reply back yesterday had taken a good long while and this one was pretty slow too, despite the shortness of it.

**Wannabe Diva: Glad you're back.**

**Randy: Glad I'm back? What about you, you're the one who disappeared.**

**Wannabe Diva: Happens sometimes.**

**Randy: You okay sweetheart? I missed you and was worried.**

**Wannabe Diva: Don't worry bout me.**

**Randy: You're talking, or rather, typing funny.**

**Wannabe Diva: Sry, sick, I'm weak. Can't talk long.**

**Randy: You sure that's not just a way to avoid me.**

**Wannabe Diva: No, talking to you now.**

**Randy: true. You sure you're not mad at me.**

**Wannabe Diva: Ya.**

**Randy: Just making sure. You get well and when you wanna talk I'm here… kind of… Watch on Wednesday?**

**Wannabe Diva: ?**

**Randy: WWE vs. ECW the special?**

**Wannabe Diva: Oh forgot. K will watch. Need to sleep.**

**Randy: Yeah get some rest and get better. I'll talk to you when you're feeling well. –hugs-**

**Wannabe Diva: Thanks, bye.**

Why did you do that Lana? Why are you still talking to him? Why are you making everything worse? And why are you talking about yourself in third person in your own head. Just goes to show I'm losing my mind.


	4. NVM

Re-edited Sept. 30 2012

**Chapter 4**

**… … …**

**Jen: You disappeared again.**

**Lana: So?**

Jen was a very good online friend who also had no idea what was going on. Nobody did. But she always hounded me with questions as to where I was. I think she had a feeling something was wrong, she was very intuitive, but no, I wasn't ready to talk about it.

**Jen: Everything okay?**

**Lana: Course, why wouldn't it be?**

**Jen: I just have this feeling something is going on when you disappear.**

**Lana: Jen, honey, don't worry about it, I'm cool you're cool, we're all cool.**

**Jen: If you say so…**

**Lana: I do :P So what's been happening?**

**Jen: Not much. You watch Raw and the special**

**Lana: Yes, Randy is back :D. U gonna watch the PPV? **

**Jen: Of course. Can't wait.**

**Lana: My boys better win. Lol**

**Jen: Your boys?**

**Lana: John and Randy they're my boys.**

**Jen: lol… You sure you're okay Lana?**

**Lana: uh huh… hold on….**

Another window popped up. I know, you're never gonna guess who it was.

**Randy: how are you feeling?**

**Lana: Like a superstar.**

**Randy: You changed your name. You don't wanna be a diva anymore.**

**Lana: it's not that I don't want to but I can't, at least not now.**

**Randy: -sigh- here we go again. If you want it Lana you can get it, don't sell yourself short, please. I can help you.**

**Lana: And I do want it, I'm just putting it on hold for now.**

**Randy: You're in your prime, your best shot would be now.**

**Lana: Stop it, okay. I CAN'T right now, I just can't. so please quit bugging me…**

I went back to my conversation with Jen thoroughly annoyed at Randy. But I didn't really blame him. He had no idea what going on. Was it really fair of me to be so angry?

**Lana: I'm back.**

**Jen: Where did you go?**

**Lana: I had to talk to someone else.**

**Jen: Ok well I gotta go to work though so I'll ttyl. Take care and if you ever need to talk let me know okay?**

**Lana: Yeah ttyl.**

I closed the window and with a loud sigh, turned back to Randy's conversation.

**Randy: Lana don't be mad at me, I'm sorry okay? I just think if someone wants something they should go for it, otherwise you may end up in the army, with a dishonorable discharge.**

**Lana: Lol, I somehow doubt I'll end up in the army. 'Sides, they won't take me.**

**Randy: They'll take anyone.**

**Lana: Almost anyone.**

**Randy: Unless you have some sort of illness or injury…**

Okay I think I pushed it too far this time. Was I crying out for help or something? How much more obvious can I get?

**Randy: Lana Can I ask you something?**

**Lana: no.**

**Randy: I'm gonna ask anyways. Are you sick? Is that why you seem so secretive? Is that why you push me away?**

**Lana: Push you away?**

**Randy: You seem to warm up but as soon as I say something, you put up a wall.**

**Lana: not this again.**

**Randy: or you avoid like you are now and change the subject. What's going on?**

**Lana: nothing. Why are you so nosy?**

**Randy: Why do you think?**

**Lana: Don't say it, please don't.**

**Randy: Why? I care about you? What's so wrong in me saying that?**

I did the smart thing, well the smart thing at the time. It was actually the cowards way when I thought about it later but at the time, it didn't matter to me, I just had to get away, so I signed out. This was going too far, he couldn't keep doing this. He couldn't keep talking about how much he cares about me, it was wrong. Just plain wrong. And him almost finding out about my illness, that was even more wrong. This whole thing was just wrong. That's it, I was going to tell him no more. I had to stop talking to my imposters. This was becoming way too real.

OK, it was now or never. I was signing back on and telling Randy no more. I knew his little secret and it had to stop now.

Signing on, I saw Randy had already signed out but that didn't stop another message from popping up.

**Trish: Hey sweetie can I talk to you for a minute?**

How the hell were they on so much if they were always so busy? Like that made a lot of sense.

**Lana: Yeah what's up?**

**Trish: Why are you so upset with him? He doesn't mean to hurt you. Why is it so bad if he cares about you?**

**Lana: It's not real. I know that, you know that, does he know that?**

**Trish: You mean cuz you've never met? That can be fixed. He just wants to get to know you, and when Raw comes up there…**

**Lana: Trish stop. We're never gonna meet okay? I'm not stupid and I refuse to carry this on any longer especially when 'Randy' has decided to go and have feelings for me.**

**Trish: What are you talking about?**

**Lana: What does he think will happen, we'll meet and I'll completely fall for him that I'll forget all about what a liar he was?**

**Trish: When has he ever lied to you?**

**Lana: Hmm, well since I first met him? Once again, I'm not stupid. How long did you expect me to carry this on?**

**Trish: Carry what on?**

**Lana: Stop playing dumb, this charade. I know that you all are imposters. You're pretty good in being on only when the real ones wouldn't be at a show but how could the real ones possibly be on as much as you guys are.**

**Trish: Wait you think we're fake?**

**Lana: When would the real superstars actually have the chance, huh? It doesn't make sense.**

**Trish: you wanna know why we're so good at being on when the "real" superstars don't have a show or appearances? It's because we are the Real Superstars.**

**Lana: I'm not dense, do you know how many imposters I have come across?**

**Trish: What gave you the idea we were imposters?**

**Lana: I just don't think it's possible.**

**Trish: Wow.**

**Lana: That's all you have to say? Do you know how many out there prolly believe you are the real deal. Don't you feel guilty or anything for leading those poor ppl on?**

**Trish: What do I have to feel guilty about? I'm not lying to anyone. WE ARE THE REAL DEAL.**

**Lana: Wow denying it until the end huh?**

**Trish: You know Randy saw something special in you. He loved talking to you because you seemed genuinely nice and you treated him like he was anyone else and now I get why. You never thought he was real that's why you didn't treat him or any of us any differently.**

**Lana: Give it up already.**

**Trish: If I was fake, I probably would have but you just don't get it Lana, we're the real deal, we're it. I'm the real Trish Stratus, you've talked to the real Ashley, the Real John Cena, the real Randy Orton because it was the real Randy Orton who fell for you… and now it's up to me to tell him you think he's a fraud. If you think we're fake then do us all a favor. Just stay away from us, especially Randy.**

Trish signed out leaving me kind of speechless. But what did I expect? Her to easily be like Ha-ha, okay you got me, I'll stop. Nah, because that would just leave me to go and slander their names all across messenger lists and messenger boards. And heaven forbid they have that happen to them. This was probably the only way any of them could ever have any friends.

I got into a fight with an imposter a year ago and it turned out a lot different. But this imposter was just horrible, I was doing him a favor calling him on his bluff and putting him out of his misery. He didn't quite see it that way. We got into a big yelling match. Well as much as you can over the internet when I called him out. That's when he started calling me all sorts of names. Not that I didn't give as good as I got, and then some… I finally ended it with saying if he was who he said he was I doubt he would be treating his fans like this. Even if it was someone like me, he wouldn't do it in front of his other fans, which is exactly what he was doing. Oddly enough he disappeared soon after that. What can I say, I'm evil.

But no, Trish wasn't like that, she completely turned it around so I was the bad person and I hurt her feelings. Made me kind of wonder how delusional these people were. Did they really think they were these wrestlers now? Had they been doing it that long?

I dunno but I said what I needed to. God only knows how many other people they were stringing along. God only knows how many others Randy said he would meet but I wasn't going to be one of them. I refused to be made a fool of. I can do that on my own thank you very much.

… … …

I actually woke up one morning feeling pretty decent, meaning I could sit up in bed and play my Bass. Being able to hold it up and move my fingers was actually the best part. Danni came over for dinner and we went to my room after to just talk and hang out. I had left my laptop on and a message was there, from Randy. I hadn't heard from him or anyone since I told off Trish. I could see Randy was invisible so they must all be blocking me. I felt a bit of excitement go through me that I quickly pushed down. I shouldn't be excited that there was a message from him because of the conversation between Trish and I. No good would ever come of this. At all.

"Who's that from?" Danni asked.

"Randy." I muttered, picking up my laptop.

There was one message from him.

**Randy: I actually trusted you. I thought you were different, but you only were because you thought I was an imposter. I actually liked you Lana.**

"What did he say?" Danni asked.

"nothing" I muttered, typing out a quick reply.

**Lana: How could I not. It works both ways, Trish wants me to leave you alone so you gotta do the same…**

**Randy: Lana, please, you have to believe me, it's really me.**

**Lana: I can't.**

**Randy: Why?**

**Lana: Because the real Randy Orton would never want me and even if he did as soon as he saw me he wouldn't anymore.**

**Randy: Why would you say that?**

**Lana: Please just don't talk to me anymore.**

"Lan? What's wrong?" Danni asked, seeing my eyes fill up with tears. "What did he say?"

I swiped at the tears wondering where they could possibly be coming from.

"I-I-" I didn't quite get it. Why was I so upset that he was so disappointed in me, that he perhaps hated me. This was what I wanted.

Quietly I put my laptop down, giving Danni an excuse as I got up and walked out of the room and into the bathroom to get a grip on myself. As I sat on the edge of the bathtub, I tried to figure out what exactly was going on. Why did this bother me so much? If I admitted to myself, then yeah the past couple weeks when I haven't talked to him, I missed him-I mean it. I missed talking that's all but not Him. I did not miss him… much…

Oh Lana you idiot, admit it you missed him.

It was fun talking to him. He made me feel….

Special.

But I was right, the Real Randy or not, if I ever met him, he wouldn't want me. I was sick and god only knows if I would get better or not. There was a chance I wouldn't and with one look at me, whoever this guy was would run the other way.

"baby, I need to use the washroom." My mother said through the door.

I quickly wiped the tears out of my eyes and walked out.

"you okay?" My mom asked placing a kiss on my forehead. I nodded, leaning into the kiss before returning to my room.

As I entered Danni, looked up and quickly typed something before closing the laptop, a panicked look on her face.

"What did you do?" I demanded, a scowl on my face as I grabbed my laptop.

"Lan, please don't be mad." She pleaded.

I looked up at her panic in my face. "What did you do?" I asked quietly.

"I told that Randy guy to leave you alone and to quit bothering you, it's what you wanted right?"

My face kind of fell, disappointed that he was more than gone now that Danni had gotten involved. "uhh, yeah, I just thought perhaps you told him about me."

"No, uh-uh." Her phone beeped and she looked down at it quickly. "But I umm, I- Look I gotta pick some groceries up for mom, I'll call you later."

With a quick hug she left me staring after her, wondering what the hell was going on and if this was finally real, any ties I had with my superstars were now completely severed.

So why was I left with such an empty feeling?


	5. OMG

Re-edited Sept. 30 2012

**Chapter 5: Chapter 5**

**… … …**

_Randy,_

_Look, I know you hate me and I'm very sorry for hurting your feelings. But what did you expect? Pretending to be someone you're not will not get you far, especially if you're gonna walk around pretending to be someone famous like Randy Orton and acting as if you were interested in me. Yes I knew from the beginning you weren't the real thing but I liked to play along, I guess making me a huge hypocrite…. Where do I get off accusing you of being someone you're not, of being fake when I'm the one here lying to everyone about my illness….how pathetic…._

_… … …_

_Randy,_

_Where the hell do you get off pretending you're the real thing for so long...?How dare you turn this all around on me like this is my fault. Who's the faker? Not me you. You, you, YOU. Thank god I'm smarter than that and knew from the beginning cuz god only knows what kind of emotional damage I would have because you decided to go around and fuck with my feelings. Do you even feel guilty? Are you even disgusted by what you did? You should be because the way you acted, the way you lead me on.. the way you.. argh.. how dare you… you suck.. and I hate you, I hate you, I hate you…No, no I don't. I don't mean that, I'm a big liar.. bleah…_

_… … …_

_Randy,_

_I'm sorry I didn't believe you. I'm an idiot and I just hope that one day you can find it in your heart to forgive me. Not just you but everyone else. I feel awful for treating you all the way I did and there's no excuse for that. All I can say is I am really truly sorry. Hopefully one day we'll be able to talk about it because I sound completely sappy and really lame and I don't blame you for never wanting to talk to me again.. I wouldn't want to talk to me either.. Lana, you suck…BIG TIME…._

_… …_

Just a few of the hundred letters I've started then deleted to Randy over the last little while. My emotions ranging from anger to hate, to forgiveness, to acceptance, to guilt, then to basically anything I could feel before it started all over again... Kinda sad huh?

It had been quite a while since we talked. They had all blocked me and yeah I'm not gonna lie when I say it hurts, a lot…But I have no one to blame but myself, isn't this what I wanted? What confused me more is that I was even more confused as to who they really were. Why couldn'tt I just let it go? Obviously if they had me blocked, chances are they didn't want me spreading around what fake imposters they were. But why couldn't I just leave it alone and move on? It was pathetic, I was pathetic because a part of me wondered what if…? What if it was him and I ruined it. But I always came to the conclusion that I ruined nothing and if I did it was better now than later. If we ever did meet, he'd freak when he found out about my illness.

"What the hell are you doing?" Danni laughed walking into my room, "you should be ready, we gotta go, you should be excited."

I made a face at her. "Excited about what? I'm not gonna get excited until there's a reason to be excited."

Danni rolled her eyes stepping closer as I quickly deleted the latest letter to Randy, closing up my laptop.

"Well come on Auntie Kim is waiting in the car, let's go."

Making another face I held out my hand to Danni who pulled me up and we walked out to the car.

… … …

I couldn't believe it, I swear the doctor had to be lying, there was just no way. I wanted a second opinion. This was all wrong.

"Stop looking like you're gonna die." Danni laughed as we headed to the car.

I stopped and stared at her. "I very well could have."

"You're done, you're in remission."

"For now." I muttered, still not quite believing it.

Danni stopped and crossed her arms, glaring at me.

"Listen up, Lan, you're fine now, you're done with it, if you just try and stay positive you can keep it away and it will soon be nothing but your past. 'Sides if you go all pouty on me now, I won't give you your surprise auntie Kim and I have for you."

I turned a wary eye on her before glancing at my mom who was all smiles, the same goofy grin plastered across her face since the doctor gave us the news.

"Surprise? How did you know everything would go well?"

Danni gave her a sheepish smile, "well we were being positive but if not well it would've been a cheering up gift."

I raised an eyebrow a small smile cracking my face, the first one since I left the office. "What is it?"

"You gonna play nice and be all smiles?" Danni asked in a teasing tone.

"Yes," I cried. "I promise, I swear, gimme gimme gimme."

Danni laughed reaching into her purse and producing 3 tickets, which I snatched out of her hand, squealing when I saw they were for the Raw House show the next night, then my face kind of dropped.

"I don't think I'm strong enough to go. It might be too much."

"I cleared it with your doctor before we left." Mom said. "He said as long as Danni and I are there and you don't overexert yourself you should be fine and he wants you to enjoy yourself, you deserve it."

My eyes widened in excitement as I looked back and forth between them.

"Look where were sitting." Danni gently pointed out.

I looked down, letting out another squeal.

"How the hell did you get front row?" I asked.

"Got them when they went on sale." She said with a grin. "So I'm thinking, we buy you a new outfit in honor of your clean bill of health."

I grinned as I got in the car. "Kay, but I want a wig. I ain't going there without one."

… … …

The crowd was hot in anticipation of a night full of wrestling. I was up at the rail ready to touch any wrestler that came close enough, Danni right beside me. Mom was sitting down. She wasn't a wrestling fan but she came to make sure I would be okay.

I held up a sign that read _'RANDY CAN RKO ME ANYDAY' _

Beside me Danni had a similar one claiming John could FU her any day.

I had a red wig on, kind of the same shade as my natural hair color, straight, and down to my shoulders. I had on black pants and a long sleeve green shirt, my skin too pale and translucent for me to want to wear something short sleeved, didn't want to blind everyone with the brightness.

The show started and we cheered every match, Danni getting behind every babyface while I cheered on the heels even if I didn't really like them, just to bug her.

Then I heard familiar music and both Danni and I let out the loudest scream ever as Randy Orton posed at the entrance before making his way down, his cocky smirk on. I waved my sign wildly and when he passed it, his smirk grew as he winked at me.

"Lana." Danni screamed, "He winked at you."

Upon hearing my cousin yell my name, Randy stopped and turned towards me.

"Lana? Lana Mitchell?"

My mouth formed an O of surprise as I stared up at him.

"yes, that's her name." Danni answered for me.

Randy held out a hand for me, which I accepted and he helped me over the barrier.

"Do you believe me now Lana?" he whispered, running his finger down my cheek as I stared up at him breathlessly, silently nodding my head.

"I've missed you." He whispered, placing a sweet kiss on my lips. "Stand in my corner tonight?"

I nodded and he grabbed my hand pulling me into his corner as a jobber came out. It was basically a squash match and I cheered Randy on as he quickly defeated his opponent, getting the 1-2-3.

After the match Randy pulled me into the ring, lifting me up on his shoulders as he celebrated his victory. Finally he put me down so I was facing him and leaned forwards giving me a longer kiss which left me breathless and begging for more.

"later." He whispered, holding the ropes open for me before he rolled out and lifted me down.

"You're beautiful in person as you are in your picture." He told me leading me backstage.

I blushed not quite believing my luck as I followed him.

Music came on for the next match and all of a sudden someone ran down the ramp, knocking into me and pushing me down. I was easily winded still being weak and it took me a moment to realize everyone had gone silent and was staring at me.

"What?" I asked brushing my hair back, except there was no hair. I felt my head which was bald and saw my wig beside me. I let out a silent groan.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Randy asked looking at me with disgust.

I quickly snatched up my wig and put it on. "I-I have, well had cancer, I lost my hair."

"That's just, that's just wrong, and gross. It was fun while it lasted."

And to my horror Randy left me on the ramp, the tears trickling down as I tried to fix my wig.

"Lana, what's wrong?"

"Leave me alone." I mumbled, staring at Randy's retreating form.

"I'm not gonna leave you alone, get your ass up, we got somewhere to be."

My eyes snapped open and I was awake.

It had only been a dream, a terrifying, horrific dream.


	6. F2F

Re-edited Sept. 30 2012

**Chapter 6: **

**… … …**

"Okay you were super excited yesterday, what's up now?"

"Nothing." I muttered staring out the window.

"Bullshit." Danni exploded. "I forbid you to ever use that word again, Lana. I'm sick and tired of you telling me all the time it's nothing."

I sighed and turned to face her. "I'm sorry Danni, really I am. I just didn't sleep well last night."

"Why not?" She asked with a frown.

"I dunno, excitement I guess. First finding out I'm in remission then you got me tickets tonight."

"Is that all?" Danni asked, looking at me with a concerned look.

I nodded, turning back to the window. "Where are we going?"

"It's a surprise." She said an evil grin on her face as she pulled into a shopping mall and parked nearby the Walmart.

"What are you doing?" I suspiciously asked. "We went shopping yesterday."

"I know." Danni replied, her smile growing as she got out of the car.

I opened my door wondering exactly what I was missing. We did go shopping last night, buying the wig and the outfit that was in my dream. Not making me really want to wear it, but it was just a dream and the only clothes that didn't fall off of me now. Right now I was wearing the pants I bought along with the green shirt. I decided to go with the blue shirt I also bought for tonight… and maybe make a different sign, I don't want any remembrance of my dream. Not like it would _actually_ happen but better safe than sorry right?

"Hurry up." Danni called as she headed into Walmart.

It was then I noticed a huge line up and a sign.

'MEET WWE SUPERSTARS, RANDY ORTON AND TRISH STRATUS, TODAY ONLY'

I paled. "Are you serious?"

"Very, let's get in line,"

"It's huge, we'll never get up front."

Danni patted me on the head. "Just be glad you have a wonderful cousin such as me, come on."

Grabbing my hand she pulled me up near the front where there were a few security guards and some important looking men in suits.

Leaving me, she moved forward a few more feet talking to the men who all turned to look at me before nodding gravely.

Danni motioned me over and as I did, she put her arm around me.

"and please don't tell the superstars, or anyone else. She's very sensitive and wouldn't even be happy about cutting in if she was able to last a long time. But she gets fatigued really easily and the doctor doesn't want her out long."

"It's no problem." One of those guys responded ushering them up near the front of the line.

"Danni, you told them?" I hissed as we followed after him.

"I had to Lana. We couldn't have you waiting in line all morning where you could get sick and we couldn't have you waiting all day in the back where you'll get sick and dehydrated. I explained to the people at Walmart who put me in touch with these guys. They understood and they're not gonna tell everyone."

"We could always go." I muttered.

Danni rolled her eyes. "Quit being a loser and come on. It took me forever to plan this for you so don't go ruining all my plans now."

"wow you whine more than me." I muttered.

Danni sent me such a deadly glare, I instantly shut my mouth.

"Here you ladies go, I can't move you all the way to the front because a few people in the front have been waiting since last night or very early this morning." Our guide explained.

"It's no problem." Danni waved him off. "As long as she's out of the sun and we won't be here all day. Again thanks for your help."

Nodding he gave them both a smile and left them there.

"I think everyone is staring at me." I whispered, looking down. "Is my wig on crooked?"

Danni smoothed down my hair. "no, you look beautiful. A few are just upset that we're standing here."

"I feel bad."

"Don't." Danni said. "There's no way I'm making you stand outside for an extended period of time. We need to get you better now not get you sicker."

A cheer started and we went up on our toes to see Randy and Trish making their way through the crowd to the table.

"Oh my god, it's them." I whispered, moving so I could see better. "I don't have a camera."

Danni pulled one out of her purse. "I plan ahead."

It took about 10 more minutes for the line to actually start moving and when it did, it was slow and I was glad that I wasn't stuck in line all day.

"I'm going to friggin hyperventilate." I said, grabbing my cousins arm when we were next in line.

"Breathe." She whispered, pulling me forward to Trish.

"Hi." Trish said, smiling brightly at both of us while she signed autographs. My cousin pushed me forward so I would lean over and she took a picture of me and Trish before I did the same thing for her.

"Thank you" I said, smiling at her and looking at her closely to see if for some odd reason she would recognize me. Of course she didn't, I don't know what I was thinking.

"You're very welcome, hope to see you both tonight."

"We'll be there front row." Danni said.

"I'll wave to you." Trish laughed.

We smiled and moved over to Randy.

"Hey there sweetheart, what's your name?" He asked as he signed our pictures

I opened my mouth to reply but nothing came out.

"Her name is Lana, Lana Mitchell." Danni replied for me.

I saw a quick look pass between Trish and Randy but it was so quick I was sure I was imagining it.

"Did you guys want a picture?" He asked.

"You go first." Danni replied, watching Randy with an odd glint in her eyes.

I leaned forward but he shook his head, "why don't you come around here? It would make a better picture."

I nodded still unable to speak, completely and utterly nervous that I was standing right beside my favorite wrestler getting my picture taken with him.

I moved around the table and leaned down but his arm went around my waist pulling me down into his lap.

"Oh." I gasped, completely taken by surprise. A flash went off and I glared at my cousin.

"Take another one." Randy said, securing his arms around my waist as he leaned in closer.

"So you do this to all the girls you talk to?" I teasingly asked, suddenly finding my voice.

"Nope just the ones I enjoy talking to."

The way he said it caused my eyes to widen as I turned to look at him as another flash appeared. This time I ignored it.

He stared back at me, all traces of humor gone from his face. We were mere inches apart and I stared into his eyes, knowing he knew exactly who I was

"Do you believe me now?" he whispered.

"No." I said, getting up and stepping back. This was a dream, it would end just like it did last time.

"You don't?" He asked me, confused. "Geez, what more do I have to do to prove it."

"No, it's not. This isn't real. Oh my god, I'm dreaming again, I'm dreaming."

"Lan, are you okay?" Danni cautiously asked.

I just stared at Randy with my hand covering my mouth. This couldn't be right. All that time ago I talked to him online it was really him. It was really Trish and John and Ashley, and I had basically told them to screw off. How was I supposed to know it was all real? Seriously this had to be a dream. Wake up Lana you're still dreaming, it's all just one continuous horrible, horrible dream. I had to prove it myself so I started pinching my arm, trying to wake myself up.

"honey, why are you pinching yourself." Danni asked, looking scared as she stepped towards me.

I stepped back. "this isn't real. I'm still dreaming." I muttered, my eyes closed as I tried to wake myself up.

"sweetheart, it's not a dream."

I felt arms wrap around me and I jumped, opening my eyes and staring into Randy's concerned blue ones

"This is not real." I whispered, finding it difficult to breathe.

"I –I think she's in shock ." Trish murmured watching me closely.

"We need to get her water." Danni commanded, suddenly sounding panicked.

"Lana can you focus on me?" I heard Randy ask.

No, no, no, I had to leave soon it would turn into the same nightmare.. My wig was gonna fall off, I quickly checked to make sure it was securely on and as I moved my hand away ,Randy grabbed my hand. He was gonna tell me how gross I was. How ugly and pathetic I was.

I pulled my hand away and turned as if too run away but he stopped me.

"Lana, what's going on?"

"This isn't real." I cried, pulling away. "I refuse to stay here and listen to how much you hate me, I won't do it."

"Lana, I don't hate you." He quietly said, pulling me to his chest. "and this is real, very real. I'm here and it's me, it's really me."

"no." I let out a sob, my knees buckling beneath me as everything went black.

… … …

"Lana, wake up please, If you want to go tonight you gotta wake up."

I moaned as everything came back to me and I quickly sat straight up, looking around for Randy and Trish.

But I was just in my own room again, only Danni and I there.

"oh god." I gasped, burying my face in my hands.

"are you okay?" Danni quietly asked.

"Just a dream." I mumbled, "It was just another nightmare. I-I can't go tonight. I can't go there Danni,"

I looked up at her, tears shining in my eyes. "I had a horrible dream that Randy was there and he knew me and he found out about my cancer and he was so disgusted with me and he hated me, and then I woke up, only I didn't, I was still dreaming and we went to some signing he was there and oh god, I don't want it to become real. I can't go tonight."

I knew I was babbling and not making much sense but I stopped when I noticed the strange look on Danni's face.

"What's wrong?" I asked her.

She sighed. "About your dreams…."


	7. JW

Re-edited Oct. 1, 2012

**Chapter 7:**

**… … …**

"What about my dreams?" I practically screeched.

"Calm down, Lana." Danni tried to soothe me, but I couldn't be calmed.

"Tell me they were dreams, please, Danni, please." I begged her, not wanting to think that even one of them could be real.

She hesitated, looking away before answering. "They were both dreams, Lana, nothing to worry about, but that's not going to stop you from going tonight. You have to go."

"I'm so scared." I muttered.

"What do you have to be scared about?"

I sighed. "The first one was a dream I get that but the second one seemed so real. We were at Walmart and he knew me, he recognized me."

"How would Randy Orton know you?" Danni asked, sounding strained, but I didn't pay much attention, lost in my own world.

"He doesn't know me, I just dreamed he did. The Randy Orton I was on messenger with, the imposter, in my dreams it was the real Randy Orton, and he recognized my picture and name."

"So because of a dream you want to skip out on tonight?" Danni asked in disbelief. "A little harsh don't you think, Lan?"

"I just- I can't risk it. What if it really is him?"

"So?" Danni asked. "Randy seems really interested in you, why is that so bad?"

I looked up at her, my eyes narrowing. "What do you mean he seems really interested in me."

"I-I just umm meant that when you talked about him back when you talked to him online he seemed umm… interested in you."

I raised an eyebrow at her. "I never talked about him with you or to anyone, Danni. Is there something you're not telling me?"

"No." She muttered not meeting my eyes. "Just get your ass ready so we can go, Auntie Kim will be home soon to take us."

She left my room and I slowly got up, wondering why she was acting so weird. And how I had slept all morning? I guess all the excitement of yesterday was too much and I was extra tired. Unless….

I sat down on the bed, staring at my black pants and green shirt that was piled up on the floor, looking like they had already been worn.

Were we…. Were we at the signing? Was that all real? Did I really in fact meet Randy and Trish? Did he actually say all that stuff to me?

No, no way, Danni wouldn't lie to me, would she?

I picked up the shirt and held it up, smelling the faint smell of man's cologne. Just as quickly, I dropped it as though burned.

What the hell was going on?

… … …

"What are you doing?" I asked as I came into the front room dressed in the black pants and blue t shirt, my hair… err wig, nicely brushed.

Danni guiltily jumped before quickly closing the laptop. "Checking my mail. Is that okay with you?"

"Where's mom?" I asked.

"Changing. You ready? She told us to go out to the car."

"Yeah sure." I distantly replied, following her out to the car.

We sat in complete silence waiting for mom and when she arrived, she leaned over to give me a kiss.

"Did you have a good time today sweetheart?" She asked.

"Doing what?" I offhandedly asked.

"Sleeping." Danni cut in. "She wants to make sure you had a good sleep."

I turned to look at Danni. "Yes I had a very good sleep."

She looked away.

"Oh, okay." My mom hesitantly replied. "Are you girls ready for some fun?"

"Mom, you don't have to pretend you're excited." I said with a chuckle. "I know you're only coming to make sure I'm okay."

She laughed. "Who's to say I can't at least look. Some of them I heard weren't that much younger than me, who knows what could happen."

My mom had me when she was 16 and my dad left us when I was 1. I don't even remember my dad. He left my mom and we haven't seen neither hide nor hair of him since. I wish I could say it didn't bother me but it did. Not because I didn't know him. Me, I didn't care about, how could I miss someone I didn't know? It bugged me that my mom had given so much to this man, and he just left her alone with a 1 year old daughter with no money or anything. He cleared out their joint bank account and took off. Oh yeah I've heard all the stories from various relatives. Especially Danni's mom, who happened to be my father's sister. When he left, all his relatives rallied around my mom, helping her get back on her feet, Mom's family had turned her back on her when she got pregnant so young. My mom and Danni's mom were really close and everyone on that side thought of my dad as a good for nothing loser. Last we heard he was running some brothel in Mexico. Yuck, I really hope to never meet him.

So when you think about it, my mom could very well hit on Batista or Triple H. They were both 36 and she was 38. Ewww. I looked at my mom.

"Please don't hit on anyone, I would die of embarrassment." I cried in mock horror.

"Ohhh, Auntie Kim, Triple H will be there, he's part of the Raw brand and in his mid 30's" Danni laughed. "or how about HBK, the Heartbreak kid."

"Sounds awfully young."

Danni and I laughed "trust me mom, he's not, he's had that nickname for ages."

"You want me to hit on someone named the Heartbreak Kid. That can't end well." She said shaking her head.

"That's good mom." I encouraged her. "You don't want to hit on the wrestlers anyways."

"Ruin all my fun, Lana." Danni replied, sitting back with a pout.

We soon arrived at the arena and just as I went to get out, Danni stopped me.

"Lana, I got one more surprise for you." She said, looking extremely nervous.

"What, is it bad?"

"No but I just didn't want to give them to you after you woke up today."

"What is it?" I asked.

Hesitantly she reached into her purse and pulled out 3 backstage passes.

"How did you get those?" I calmly asked.

"I won them while you were sleeping it was a contest on the radio, I was the tenth caller."

"Really." I said in disbelief, thinking it sounded kind of off and too coincidental.

"Really." She confirmed, "But if you don't want to use them, that's fine, not like I paid for them."

I plucked one out of her hands, scrutinizing it.

"We'll see." Was all I said as we got out and went into the arena.

… … …

A giggle was heard over the sound system as Trish's music played and she came out for her match against Mickie James. As she walked bye, waving at her fans, she sent a wave and a wink to us.

Because in my dream she said she would wave at us. I think I was really beginning to doubt this whole dream thing.

Trish won her match and the next match out was Chris Masters who I swore kept looking over at us before he got into the ring. Kay, he was never in my dream, I mean I talked to him online, maybe he thought Danni was hot.

The last match of the night was one I had been waiting to see live since the feud between them started. Randy Orton and John Cena.

Randy came out first and as he passed by us, he barely gave us a second glance. John came out and he didn't look either. Which made me feel tons better. I must have been imagining everything else. I wanted something so badly to be there that I was imagining things.

The match started and the two locked up but quickly pulled apart and went into their own corners. John turned around and scanned the crowd, his eyes briefly resting on me and Danni before turning back around and locking once more with Randy, this time a bit longer before they broke apart again, this time Randy briefly looked at us before the match really got under way.

I scowled and sat in seat beside my mom.

"What's wrong?" She asked, "Are you feeling okay?"

I nodded watching the match with my arms crossed. The scowl still in place.

I must've spaced out because the match was over and John had made Randy tap to the STFU. John celebrated in the ring before rolling out and grabbing his hat that didn't quite make it into the crowd. As he passed by us he leaned over the barricade and placed the too large hat on my head.

"Cheer up there Princess or your face might get stuck that way."

With a wink, he left slapping Danni's hand, and other fans on the way as the people behind me began to gather around wanting to touch the hat, I felt someone try to pull it off but I quickly snatched it back, standing up and turning it around to see a blonde woman with huge boobs trying to take it.

"Back off." I told her.

"You think he meant it for you?" She sneered.

Danni chuckled. "Actually he did give it to her you dumb bitch."

More people began to crowd around all wanting to see the hat John Cena had just given to me and to top it off that skank was also advancing on me, trying to get it.

"Get lost." I screeched, staring to feel suffocated as everyone began to move closer, there was no way in hell I'd be able to push them away.

"Back off." My mom and cousin both yelled. "leave her alone."

Everyone still moved closer and I began to panic as the skank once more swiped at my hat. She pulled it off and just as I went to pull it back, another hand came out and snatched it away from her, before reaching under my arms and lifting me over the barrier.

"No." I silently groaned as the hat was placed back on my head. I knew exactly who was behind me.

"You have the passes?"

Danni held them up as he first helped her then my mom over the barrier.

"I knew it." I snapped, turning to glare first at Randy then at Danni.

"Knew what dear?" My mother asked in awe.

"It's a conspiracy." I muttered. "Mom, I want to go home."

"Honey, this nice man just got us out of there."

"Yeah why don't you come backstage?" He said.

"Come on, Lan, if we don't you'll have to go through there and go past Skanky McSkank."

"I can take her." I muttered.

She laughed. "You can't even take me anymore. So drop the pout and follow Randy. He went through a lot of trouble for us."

"Really?" I asked, "Gee Dan, he seems to only have lifted us over the barricade but you seem to be holding so much back from me so why don't you tell me exactly what he did for us."

"I'm standing right here." He reminded them. "You don't have to talk like I'm not here."

I rolled my eyes, my scowl returning to my face as I crossed my arms and followed behind him, Danni and my mom. Stopping once to turn around and lift my middle finger to the skank that tried to start something earlier, who looked ready to murder me.

At least that made me feel better.


	8. IDK

Re-edited Oct. 1, 2012

**Chapter 8: **

… … …

"Hey Princess, you're still scowling." A voice said beside me as we walked backstage. "Didn't I tell ya your face would get stuck like that?"

I turned my deadly glare onto him and he held his hands up in mock defense.

"Alright, Orton, what did ya do to piss her off?"

Randy looked back at me briefly meeting my eyes as he shrugged, a look of sadness on his face. "I don't know she's been like that ever since I pulled her out of the mob that looked ready to kill her."

"I've been like this ever since I figured out someone has lied to me." I said, glaring at Danni. "And that I didn't dream what I thought I did and I realized I made myself look like a complete idiot earlier today. If I had known it wasn't a dream, I wouldn't have come."

"Which is why I told you it was a dream." An exasperated Danni replied before turning to Randy and John. "You'll hafta ignore my cousin, she's been incredibly cranky the last few months. Everything pisses her off and she's negative about everything and everyone and walks around with a huge, gigantic stick up her-"

"Go to Hell Danni." I snapped. "I wouldn't be so grumpy if you had just told the goddamned truth once in a while."

"Girls." My mom said getting in between us in attempt to calm us down, but I stepped around her,

"You never really paid for the tickets, did you? Never won the backstage passes huh? He gave them all to you and he helped you cut in line. How long have you been in contact with him? Huh?"

"You know I'm still standing right here." Randy said trying to interrupt us this time.

I just gave him a look that would shut anyone up

"God you think you'd be happy. Hello. I got you Randy Orton the guy who seriously likes you and the guy you've been completely lusting over for who knows how long, but you can't see it because you'd rather be stuck in your own little world. Making yourself and everyone else around you miserable"

"Makes me wonder what else you've blurted out, huh Danielle June?" I said using her full name, and middle name which I knew she hated. "You tell him everything?"

"Why don't you just back off and calm down Alana May." She snapped back at me, knowing it would piss me of just as much.

A cruel joke of our parents giving us the middle names of the months we were born in. Or so we always said.

We glared at each other and we heard a small chuckle beside us. As one, we turned to glare at John Cena.

"What's so damn funny?" we snapped at the same time

"Are those your middle names? Cause that's just damn funny June and May who came up with that brilliant idea?"

My mom raised her hand "that would be me and Danni's mom. We thought it was cute at the time"

I just growled at John as I advanced on him but all of a sudden found an arm wrapping around my waist and pulling me back and another arm lifting my legs out from beneath me.

"Let me go." I cried, struggling against Randy but to no avail. I was as weak as a newborn kitten and he, well he was a wrestler.

"Lana, please." My mom pleaded. "Just calm down I don't want you overexerting yourself. This was supposed to be a stress free fun night for you."

"Well it would've been if someone over there wasn't a meddling loser."

Danni growled and stepped towards me but she was scooped up by John.

"Opposite corners." He said.

"Ma'am, is it alright if I talk to your daughter alone for a few moments?" Randy politely asked my mother who nervously chewed her lip.

"Perhaps we should get her home. This might've been too much for her."

"Let her go Auntie Kim. Perhaps _he_ could talk some sense into her. Lord knows she needs it."

"Did anyone think to ask me? I'm standing right gave you all permission to rule my life." I growled.

"Now you know how it feels." Randy replied, before turning back to my mom. "We won't be gone long, I swear."

My mom nodded her consent and Randy carried me off down the hallway and into an empty locker room. When we got inside he locked the door and placed me on my feet as I scowled up at him.

"You scowl too much." He said lifting the hat up I still had on a bit so he could see my eyes.

"What do you want?" I snapped.

"You're a lot nicer online."

"Yeah well you're not even supposed to be real. You're supposed to be an imposter." I muttered.

He sighed. "But I'm not and I never gave the impression that I was. And now you're mad at me cause I'm not an imposter."

"How long have you been in contact with Danni?" I abruptly asked, trying to see how much he knew.

"Once when you told me to buzz off, and a few times after, when she heard we were coming here."

"So she believed you were real?" I asked in disbelief, my face flushing in anger.

"You have quite the temper."

"Hello? Redhead?" I snapped, pointing out the obvious.

"Can you quit snapping at me for one minute?" He asked annoyed. "I didn't do anything to you."

"Except freak the hell out of me earlier today, and kidnap me just now."

"How is that kidnapping?" He asked. "I asked your mom."

"But not me."

"I already knew what your answer would be."

"Then you should've respected it."

"Don't talk to me about respect. You've been a total bitch ever since I saved your ass from a mob of crazy fans."

"Well gee, I don't remember asking you to save me, now did I?"

"What is your problem?" He asked.

"My problem is you. You decide to come waltzing into town and expect me to fall at your feet."

"What are you smoking? I never once expected that. I just wanted to talk to you and get to know you a bit better"

"We quit talking months ago." I snapped back.

"And whose fault is that?" He asked, stepping up so he was right in my face but I refused to back down. There was no way in hell I would let down my defenses and let Randy in only to have him shun me when he found out the truth.

"Not mine. Who told me to leave you guys alone?"

"Who thought I was fake?"

"Oh my god I'm not gonna sit here and have some stupid petty argument with you, of all people."

"Why? what's wrong with me?" he asked raised an eyebrow

I rolled my eyes. "I never said anything was."

"Then why do I bug you so much?"

"You don't." I replied, taking a step back, finally realizing just how close he was too me. He just stepped with me.

"I think I do, I think I'm getting right under your skin." He trailed his fingers lightly up my arm, bringing out an involuntary shiver from me.

"What do you want from me?" I whispered.

"Just what I told you online. For the first time since I became a wrestler I met someone who finally treated me like a real person. I just want to get to know you."

My senses finally snapped into place.

"Well tough, I don't want to get to know you."

"You seemed to online."

"You weren't real. I never actually planned on meeting you so why don't you just leave me alone?"

"Is that what you really want?" He asked.

"Yes." I snapped, avoiding his eyes.

"Then look at me and tell me that."

"Go to hell." I mumbled, not looking up.

"Come on Lana, look at me. I want you to look at me and tell me that, cause that fact that you can't look at me tells me another story. I think you want to get to know me too."

I finally looked up and opened my mouth to tell him just that but I faltered and he seemed to pick right up on it, grabbing my arms and pulling me closer, capturing my lips with his in a hard, demanding kiss, nothing at all like the sweet one in my dream.

Oh god my dream.

I pulled away and used all my strength to yank my arms away, bringing my hand up to slap him across the face.

There was no way in hell I was letting that dream become a reality, I couldn't bear to have Randy Orton look at me with such disgust.

"Don't ever do that again."

I left him there, stunned, as I raced out the door and back to where I had left Danni and my mom.

"Honey you shouldn't be running." My mom said as soon as she saw me.

"You sick or somethin'?" John asked.

"Or something." Was all I said, turning to my mom." I want to go now."

"what happened baby?"

"Nothing momma I just need to go, I think I overexerted myself and I'm extra tired."

She wrapped an arm round my shoulder as we walked down the hall but as we turned I saw Danni handing John a piece of paper before waving goodbye.

"Liar." I heard her mutter behind me.

Without my mom seeing I also flipped her the bird.


	9. Chapter 9

New authors note…as you can guess, randy is back on Raw here but since it's been awhile since they've talked, time has fast forwarded and I'm basically using my own storylines and everything….gotta problem… meh you can quit reading lol…

--- --- ---

Title: Instant Messenger 9?

Author: Harmoni

Category: WWE

Rating: T for teen...cuz I like to swear hehehe

Summary: A nice messenger chat with WWE imposters becomes her way for escape. Cause that's all they were, Imposters. she wasn't that dense, she just wanted to pretend and play along cuz that's what they were doing.. Right?

Disclaimer: the OC's belong to me… wrestlers belong to the WWE and themselves,

Spoilers: Randy is suspended, and I'll prolly just make it up as I go along… I might follow some things that happen and discard the rest. My fan fic, my rules ha ha ha)

Feedback: Please

Author's Note: Ahem if this completely sucks, I'm blaming it on my feverish mind… I wrote this while sick. There is an explanation behind this story that I may perhaps share at a later date. I dreamed half of it… but that's how a lot of my fics start...and before people go on about another Randy story… SOOOO not my fault… My Randy Muse is running rampant and SOOOO not my fault… please tell me what you honestly think it's written in 1st person which I usually don't do… oh and this part is unbetaed…my poor girls internet is down.

--- --- ---

**Jen: Well? How was it? you've been awfully quiet.**

**Lana: Meh.**

**Jen: hold on let me bring in Krista, she wants all the details too…**

Oh boy this was going to be fun. Jen and Krista were my closest online friends. They were the only ones who I had ever come close to telling but then chickened out in the end. They knew I had gone to the house show last night and that I was sitting front row so of course I'm sure they were dying to know what was going on.

**Krista: Hey psycho so Jen said you were about to give up all the details on the show. Didja get to touch any of them?**

**Lana: You can say that.**

**Jen: Well tell us.**

I bit my bottom lip at a loss for what to say.. I can tell them and the whole story can some up or I can lie to them again. They've been wonderful and I was sick of lying to them all the time about where I was and how I was feeling.

**Lana: Remember awhile back when I told you guys I met these WWE imposters online?**

**Jen: yes…**

**Krista: oh god are you gonna tell us what I think you are?**

**Jen: What?**

**Krista: either she thought they were real and made a complete fool out of herself or they WERE real.**

**Lana: Bingo!**

**Jen: No way.**

**Krista: How?**

**Jen: we want details…NOW!**

**Lana: well my cousin and I went to a signing for Trish and Randy and when we got there, he recognized my name and picture and I well kind of passed out and when I woke up I was at home again and thought it was all a dream.**

**Krista: You passed out? That is fucking hilarious…**

**Lana: scowls it wasn't at the time.**

**Jen: wait a sec, Randy Orton recognized you? How the hell did that happen?**

**Lana: apparently someone likes me.**

**Krista: NO FUCKING WAY!**

Did I mention Krista loves to swear?

**Lana: Yeah huh. When I thought he was fake and he was telling me all that I basically freaked and called him on being fake. We quit talking but little did I know my cousin continued talking to him and got us the front row seats and backstage passes…when I realized she tricked me I got pissed off but I didn't quite get why Trish, Masters, and John all kept looking after me. John and Randy wrestled and after the match John gave me his hat, I was almost attacked by a mob cuz of that and Randy saved me.**

**Krista: Now you're making this shit up.**

**Jen: Krista shut up I wanna hear this.**

**Lana: Randy saved me, I freaked out at my cousin for lying to me, we almost got into a fist fight until him and John pulled us apart. Randy took me to talk we got into a big argument, then he kissed me, I slapped him, then I ran off…**

**Krista: Then you woke up.**

**Lana: How I wish… I'm not that lucky.**

**Jen: That sounds like you're very lucky. Why would you slap Randy for kissing you?**

**Krista: Are you crazy?**

**Lana: I freaked.**

**Krista: No shit, but hello, hot guy.**

**Jen: the guy you've been lusting over since like ever.**

**Lana: Or since I came across him.**

**Krista: So you slapped him…why?**

**Lana: I had my reasons….**

**Krista: Which are?**

**Jen: I think you wouldn't have done it unless something happed. Was he being a sleaze? I heard he was an asshole backstage.**

**Lana: no he was nothing but sweet. I did that for both our own goods. I'm not starting something with Randy Orton. No good will come of it.**

**Krista: Are you on crack? If Batista kissed me I'd be all over that in a heartbeat. And I'd never leave that sexy man alone after that.**

**Jen: Why Lana? What's going on? You know we're here to talk whenever you need us? What happened?**

**Lana: If Randy ever saw me, I mean really saw me, if he knew, he'd run the other way. He'd hate me.**

**Jen: honey, why would you say that?**

**Krista: Yeah no bashing.**

**Lana: God if you guys knew you'd hate me too.**

**Krista: No we won't we could never hate you..**

**Jen: What could be so bad?**

**Lana: how about me being a liar who never told anyone the truth about me.**

**Krista: I knew it, you're a 50 year old man.**

**Lana: you got me p**

**Jen: honey what is it really?**

**Lana: I don't want anything to happen between me and Randy because I don't want to see the look on his face when he finds out about me.**

**Jen: hun just tell us already, we're not gonna hate you.**

**Lana: I didn't want Randy to find out I have/had cancer.**

**Krista: and….?**

**Lana: And what?**

**Krista: and you killed someone in a fit of anger?**

**Lana: What/ no what the hell are you talking about?**

**Jen: Lana I think what Krista is trying to so tactfully to say is basically why would we hate you if you have cancer? You're our friend. If you didn't want to tell us right away that's fine, I know it's a stressful time for you and all but that doesn't mean you have to stop living. I'm positive Randy won't hate you for it either. **

**Krista: Jen's right. You are our friend. I'm glad you trust us enough to tell us. WE don't think you're a liar or anything and if he does well then those rumors about him being a dick are true.. but OMG the real Randy Orton?**

**Lana: hugs thanks girlies. And yes the real thing.. it was him.**

**Krista: Do you like him?**

**Lana: well yeah, I've lusted after him for god knows how long, but all that aside. I loved talking to him and he says that was the main reason he was drawn to me because I didn't treat him any differently then I would anyone else.. but of course I wouldn't I had no clue it was really him. WE had fun talking and it was sweet, he was sweet.**

**Jess: Then why push him away. Why would he react badly?**

**Lana: Cuz I'm ugly, I'm bald and I have this huge ugly scar in my chest from where they administered the chemo. I went into remission 2 days ago.**

**Jen: cheers congrats, lady.**

**Krista: Yeah psycho, same here. You know we're always here for you.**

**Jen: Now you gotta make it like the movies and go get your man.**

**Lana: Are you kidding? After I bitch slapped him? Lol**

**Krista: Was the kiss good?**

**Lana: like you wouldn't believe. **

**Krista: Then message his ass.**

**Lana: I'm scare. The night before I had a dream. One where he found out and it scared me. He was so mean, and I was so hurt….**

**Krista: And you're so gone…**

**Jen: Sounds like love to me.**

**Lana: Shut up, it does not… he only said he wanted to get to know me better… as friends.**

**Jen: hmm I don't usually go around kissing my friends or potential friends, do you Krista?**

**Krista: Yeah but that's another story.. LMAO! But I doubt Psycho does… she' not that type of girl.**

**Lana: p how would you know?**

**Krista: Intuition. So?**

**Lana: So what?**

**Krista: Do I gotta spell everything out for you? When the hell are you gonna get in touch with him?**

**Lana: ummm how bout..NEVER…**

**Jen: is that what you want?**

**Lana: Does it matter what I want? It's how it has to be.**

**Jen: Nuh uh.**

**Lana: girlie if you really saw me, you'd get it.**

**Krista: How old is that picture?**

**Lana: before the cancer obviously… it's about a year old. **

**Jen: He's already seen you, he's not gonna care.**

**Lana: Ladies please give it up.**

**Krista: What about your cousin?**

**Lana: I dunno haven't talked to her yet today. I'll deal with her later…**

**Krista: You really pissed?**

**Lana: ahh Yeah…. She tricked me…**

**Jen: ahh redhead…**

**Lana: hey I resent that….**

**Jen: Do you deny it?**

**Lana: well no…. OMFG.. I don't believe it… I gotta go..**

**Krista: What's going on?**

**Lana: I'll tell you later?**

**Jen: are you feeling okay?**

**Lana: Yes, I'm feeling fine and you guys aren't allowed to ask me that**

**Or pity me or anything. I won't allow it.**

**Krista: Fine Psycho but what's going on?**

**Lana: I just got a message, I'll ttyl.**

**Jen: it's from Randy, isn't it…**

**Krista: We're waiting for you…**

I wasn't lying I did have a message and it took me awhile to get the nerve to open it up. I stared at it, unsure of what to do…open it? Close it and sign out.

I quickly opened it and shut my eyes, counting to 3 before I opened them again.

**Randy: we need to talk. Either you talk to me on here or John will call your cousin and get the number. He has Danni's number. So what will it be?**

My eyes widened in disbelief.

Oh god this couldn't be happening.

--- --- ---


	10. Chapter 10

Sorry all, I've been trying ot get this out for the past few days but this site ws just not letting it happen.. but now, yay! will try and get the next one up soon

--- --- ---

Title: Instant Messenger 10?

Author: Harmoni

Category: WWE

Rating: T for teen...cuz I like to swear hehehe

Summary: A nice messenger chat with WWE imposters becomes her way for escape. Cause that's all they were, Imposters. she wasn't that dense, she just wanted to pretend and play along cuz that's what they were doing.. Right?

Disclaimer: the OC's belong to me… wrestlers belong to the WWE and themselves,

Spoilers: Randy is suspended, and I'll prolly just make it up as I go along… I might follow some things that happen and discard the rest. My fan fic, my rules ha ha ha)

Feedback: Please

Author's Note: Ahem if this completely sucks, I'm blaming it on my feverish mind… I wrote this while sick. There is an explanation behind this story that I may perhaps share at a later date. I dreamed half of it… but that's how a lot of my fics start...and before people go on about another Randy story… SOOOO not my fault… My Randy Muse is running rampant and SOOOO not my fault… please tell me what you honestly think it's written in 1st person which I usually don't do… oh and this part is unbetaed…my poor girl's internet is down.. grrrrrr…

--- --- ---

**Randy: Ignore me all you want but I know you're there reading this and if you keep ignoring me, I'll have to resort to drastic measures.**

I continued to stare at the screen. Did this guy ever give up? I slapped him, told him to leave me alone. What more do I have to do?

**Lana: What type of drastic measures?**

**Randy: The kind that includes me getting John to call up your cousin to get your address and then when there happens to be some time off coming over there to talk to you.**

**Lana: Why can't you leave me alone?**

**Randy: Is that what you want?**

**Lana: And if I told you yes, then would you leave me alone?**

**Randy: no**

**Lana: Then why ask what I want?**

**Randy: Cuz I don't think it's what you really want.**

**Lana: Stop! You don't know what I want, Danni doesn't know what I want so why can't you all butt out and leave me alone?**

**Randy: Okay I'll leave you alone.**

**Lana: You will?**

**Randy: Yup.**

**Lana: Really? Just like that?**

**Randy: If that's what you want.**

**Lana: Yeah I do.**

**Randy: Okay but I want you to tell me that.**

**Lana: fine, leave me alone.**

**Randy: That's not what I meant.**

The phone began to ring and my eyes snapped toward the door. No, no way, I was going to kill Danni for giving him my number. I stood up and opened the door.

"Mom, don't answer." I yelled but it was too late.

"hello?" I heard my mom ask. "yes this is her."

I breathed a sigh of relief, going back to my laptop, but saw no new message from Randy.

Then it happened.

"Lana, phone."

I swore, opening up my door. "I'm not here." I hissed at her

My mom handed me the phone. "Too late I already told him you were here."

I took the phone, shooting her a dirty look.

"What?" I snapped.

"_Is that anyway to treat an old friend?"_

I racked my brain, trying to figure out who it was. Finally it hit me.

"Derek?"

It was my ex.

"What do you want?"

"_I just called to see how you were."_

"Oh perfect, you know how it is."

"_how are you feeling?"_

"Horrible. What do you think? Why are you calling now?"

"_I heard it was gone."_

I pulled the phone away staring at it in disbelief. Was he serious?

"_It_ is not gone, Derek. _It _is still very much there and _It _will always be a part of my life. I'm in remission if that's what you mean, why do you want to know.

"_Well you can move back in now right?"_

"Y-you want to get back together? Where the hell were you this whole time I was sick?"

His reply was cut off by the call waiting beep.

"Hold on my other line is going."

I clicked on and answered.

"Hello?"

"_So say it."_

"What? Randy? Oh my god, like I really need this right now."

"_What's wrong?"_

"My ex is on the other line wanting to get back together now that-"

"_Now that what?"_

"Nothing, I dunno why I'm even telling you."

"_You want to get back with him?"_

"Oh hell no."

"_Then tell him so."_

"I plan on it."

"_Give it what you got."_

"Fine I will."

I clicked back over.

"Derek?"

"_So what do you think?"_

"I think that I don't want to get back together with you. I think it's really over. If you can't be there for me while I'm sick, then I can't be with you, good bye Derek."

I clicked back to the other line.

"See? Told you I would-wait a sec, why am I talking to you about it?"

"_Can we talk now?"_

"I thought we were."

"_You know what I mean. If you want me to leave you alone then tell me so."_

"Fine, Randy, leave me alone."

He chuckled. _"Okay I wasn't expecting that to be so easy."_

"So you'll leave me alone now?"

"_No."_

"But you said…"

"_I lied."_

I let out a huge sigh. "Randy why are you bugging me? I don't have time for this and how did you get my number? Did Danni give it to you?"

"_No, John called Danni then she gave it to him."_

I let out a frustrated scream. "Mom, give me your cell phone."

"_Lana."_

"Hold on." I snapped, grabbing the cell phone out of my mom's hand.

"Is everything okay?" My mom asked.

"Just peachy." I growled punching in Danni's number.

"_Hello?"_

"You're so dead."

"_Lana please just calm down."_

"Don't tell me to calm down. Where the hell do you get off going behind my back? AGAIN?"

She sighed. _"Did you talk to him?"_

"No he's-oh shit he's still on the phone. I'll call you back and you better answer, cause you're dead."

"_Oh like that gives me an incentive to answer. Just do everyone a favor and talk to him."_

"I hate you." I hissed hanging up the phone.

"_Sweetheart?"_

"Don't call me that." I snapped at him.

He sighed. _"Lana."_

"What?" I snapped again.

"_Why are you so angry at everyone?"_

"Can we talk later? I gotta go."

"_No you don't. If you hang up I'm coming over there. Or perhaps that's what you want."_

I went back into my room, sinking down onto my bed, tears in my eyes as I decided to switch tactics. "Fine, I give in. Randy I think you are the hottest guy on the planet. I've wanted you for over 2 years now in the baddest kind of way. And now that I know you feel the same way then come get me. I'll travel with you and we can go and get married and have our 2.5 kids and a cute little picket fence. I'm sorry it took so long for me to realize this but I thought it was a dream for the longest time."

"_What? See now you're just saying that to get rid of me."_

I let out a high pitch giggle, my expression now completely changed, as was my tone. "nuh uh. I just finished talking to some friends and they told me to go and get you. They're right of course, I'm an idiot acting like a spoiled brat and I hope you can forgive me."

"_Really?"_

"Well duh. So when are you coming to get me?"

"_For what?"_

Another giggle. "You want to get to know me, so what better way then to travel together?"

"_You want to travel?"_

"Just send me a ticket."

"_What the hell is going on?"_

"What are you talking about? Hun, I thought this is what you wanted?"

"_Not exactly what I had in mind. Look Lana, I'll call you back later okay?"_

He hung up and I turned the phone off a big smug smile on my face. So that's what I had to do all along? Talk like I actually wanted him? That was easy, I was free. He wouldn't be bugging me anymore, no more calls, no more messages, no more of Danni's meddling. I'm sure that scared him away completely. He would never know my secret now, he would never look at me they way he did in my dream. It was done.

I felt like patting myself on the back.

--- --- ---

**Danni: What did you do?**

It was many hours after the phone call and I had yet to call back Danni and kill her. The motivation was gone, Randy was gone.

**Lana: I told him what he wanted to hear :D**

**Danni: NO you didn't you purposely scared him away. Lana, he _likes_ you. Why are you being so damned stubborn?**

**Lana: And why can't you butt out? Give it up Danni. I don't want to be with him. I refuse to let him into my personal hell.**

**Danni: You're in remission. **

**Lana: But for how long?**

**Danni: Hopefully forever and if not then you'll kick its ass again. But you can't shut him out. He wants to be your friend Lana. It should be up to him if he wants to be there or not through it. You can't decide that for him.**

**Lana: Too late.**

**Danni: You really think he's gone for good? If so, you're an idiot.**

**Lana: I'm an idiot? Excuse me?**

**Danni: You heard me, or ahhh read it right…You can't decide who and who will not care for you, it's not up to you to decide that.**

**Lana: I can make him stop caring.**

**Danni: But why? Why are you trying so hard to push everyone away? Why do you want so badly to just be alone?**

**Lana: Did you…. Did you tell him about me?**

**Danni: Sigh No Lana, that is up to you to tell him.**

**Lana: Oh look you were able to keep your mouth shut about something.**

**Danni: hate me all you want. But one day you'll thank me.**

**Lana: Doubt it.**

**Danni: If you say so. He will call you back you know. He's not just gonna give up.**

**Lana: He couldn't get off the phone fast enough. It's done.**

**Danni: So you think. That's not what he told John.**

**Lana: And how would you know?**

**Danni: John told me.**

**Lana: You're talking to John?**

**Danni: Yes I gave him my number. He seems cool and plus I had a feeling you weren't gonna be super nice to Randy, so it was a back up plan.**

**Lana: Danni? Butt out okay?**

**Danni: Not until you answer my question**

**Lana: What question?**

**Danni: Why are you trying so hard to push everyone away? Why do you want so badly to just be alone?**

I stared at the question for a long time, not caring that I was making Danni wait. Why was I so stubborn on keeping everyone away? The only people I had let in were Danni and my mom and most recently Jen and Krista but no one else. It hadn't just been my friends ignoring me, what I didn't tell Danni all those months ago sitting on the porch, the few friends that did call, I was nasty to them and when I missed their calls I never returned them.

**Lana: If something ever happened to me, if this cancer comes back and takes over my body, if it eventually kills me, then so be it, but I'm not leaving behind a wake of hurt people, to mourn over me. It's better if I'm left alone. The less people to feel guilty about leaving, the better.**

**Danni: Again Lana, that's not your decision to make.**

**--- --- ---**


	11. Chapter 11

Seriously thank you to all who have reviewed it means a lot nd it's what keeps me updating so much so please keep letting em know what you think

--- --- ---

Title: Instant Messenger 11?

Author: Harmoni

Category: WWE

Rating: T for teen...cuz I like to swear hehehe

Summary: A nice messenger chat with WWE imposters becomes her way for escape. Cause that's all they were, Imposters. she wasn't that dense, she just wanted to pretend and play along cuz that's what they were doing.. Right?

Disclaimer: the OC's belong to me… wrestlers belong to the WWE and themselves,

Spoilers: Randy is suspended, and I'll prolly just make it up as I go along… I might follow some things that happen and discard the rest. My fan fic, my rules ha ha ha)

Feedback: Please

Author's Note: Ahem if this completely sucks, I'm blaming it on my feverish mind… I wrote this while sick. There is an explanation behind this story that I may perhaps share at a later date. I dreamed half of it… but that's how a lot of my fics start...and before people go on about another Randy story… SOOOO not my fault… My Randy Muse is running rampant and SOOOO not my fault… please tell me what you honestly think it's written in 1st person which I usually don't do… oh and this part is unbetaed…my poor girl's internet is down.. grrrrrr…

--- --- ---

**John: hey Princess.**

**Lana: hi.**

**John: Whatcha doin?**

**Lana: shrugs Watching TV.**

**John: Can we talk?**

**Lana: We already are and I know what you're gonna talk to me about and I don't think I want to talk to you about it.**

**John: We're all just trying to understand.**

**Lana: You talk to Danni, she has a big mouth.**

**John: You still mad at your cousin?**

**Lana: not so much. I know she has her reasons, even if I do think she's being dumb.**

**John: Danni tells us you have your reasons, can't you tell us your reasons, cuz she won't.**

**Lana: What are you talking about? I gave in to Randy, didn't he tell you that?**

**John: Yes but you expect anyone to believe that?**

**Lana: Got him off the phone…**

**John: So why you hate him now?**

**Lana: I don't.**

**John: you act like it.**

**Lana: I don't. First I was freaked out cuz it was him. Then I was mad because him and Danni were scheming behind my back. That's not cool.**

**John: lol okay Carlito.**

**Lana:p**

**John: and now?**

**Lana: Never wanted him to kiss me.**

**John: He kissed you?**

**Lana :I can't be in a relationship right now John, I can't. it's not fair to him.**

**John: why?**

**Lana: It isn't, just trust me.**

**John: What about friendship? Can't you do that? You guys were getting a long great before. **

**Lana: Why are you trying so hard? Why is he? I'm a nobody, I'm nothing special.**

**John: Obviously he doesn't think so Princess. If he thought that way he woulda left you alone a long time ago. So instead of putting him through this hell and making him miserable, cuz he's no fun to hang out with on the road, why don't you both take a crack at it on being friends.**

**Lana: I don't know.**

**John: I ain't gonna push you but Danni says you haven't been exactly pleasant either, so I'm thinking you and Orton, you need to talk. Just talk on here like you used to, see what happens?**

**Lana: And when did you become a therapist?**

**John: lol, I am a doctor.**

**Lana: Thuganomics, psychology.. hmmmmm… you're right they do sound very similar. Well damn I'm canceling my appt. with my doctor and I'll just go to you from now on.**

**John: Princess, I doubt you could afford me.**

**Lana: Already am getting it free.**

**John: it's a one time thing, don't get used to it.**

**Lana: Do you like my cousin?**

**John: Where the hell did that come from?**

**Lana: You're talking to her now aren't you?**

**John: Yeah, we mostly talk about you two.**

**Lana: So do you like her?**

**John: Aren't we discussing u? But yeah Danni's pretty cool. So u gonna talk to Orton?**

**Lana: sighs fine we'll talk. But you tell him that no more kissing or anything, otherwise I'm punching him.**

**John: You're feisty, I like that.**

**Lana: Meh, I try.**

**John: That must be why Randy likes you. That, and you rejected him….lol… who turns down Randy Orton…?**

**Lana: raises eyebrow If you like him so much why don't you go out with him?**

**John: Cuz that's just getting a little too weird. 'sides, we wouldn't wanna disappoint all the lovely ladies.**

**Lana: rolls eyes oh please. I'm sure they'd all survive.**

**John: ouch you're mean.**

**Lana: And you wrestlers are a bunch of wusses. Doesn't take much to wound you does it?**

**John: We're a sensitive bunch.**

**Lana: That's hard to believe…Hold on there's someone at my door.**

I ran to the door as it rang again and threw it open, staring at Danni in surprise.

"Since when do you ring?"

"I didn't want you throwing stuff at me. I just came to drop something off, I gotta get back to work."

"What?" I asked, trying to remember what I had leant her.

She gave me a little smile as her eyes drifted to the side and out stepped Randy from behind the wall. My eyes widened as I touched my hair, thankful I had gone out for a short walk earlier and my wig was still on.

"What are you doing here?" I whispered.

He shrugged, leaning against the door jamb. "I told you when I had some time off I would come see you."

"No you threatened. Big difference."

"I gotta get back to work." Danni said, waving at them both as she left.

"You gonna invite me in?" He asked.

"Do I have to?" I asked but a small smile was on my face.

"You seem to be in a better mood. John cheer you up?"

I narrowed my eyes. "Does he report everything to you?"

"Just what I ask him to and don't worry I won't give you a reason to punch me."

"Okay fine I'll let you in."

He moved to come in but I put my arm across, stopping him. He looked at me, a puzzled look on his face.

"I'm serious Randy, this is to remain friends only. I don't want you getting crazy notions in your head like falling in love with me."

He held out his hand. "Fine we're friends."

We shook on it.

--- --- ---

"Lana, I'm home." My mom called

"And I'm going out." I told her as I grabbed Randy's arm and headed for the door.

"Where are you going?"

I shrugged, "Dinner. You want anything?"

She shook her head a small excited smile on her face as she kissed me on the forehead. "No you two have fun and look after my daughter."

"Of course Mrs. Mitchell." Randy said.

I held out my hand for the keys to the car but my mom ignored me, instead handing them to Randy.

"I'd feel much safer if he drives, baby."

I nodded, knowing she worried about me still and although it bugged me sometimes Id be like that too, considering I once almost drove into a ditch one time when I was out driving. It was in between Chemo rounds so I thought I'd be okay. Luckily Danni was there.

"So where are we going?" Randy asked, as we got in the car.

I shrugged. "What do you feel like?"

"Where do you like eating?"

I smiled. "Old Spaghetti Factory." I gave him the directions and we just chatted as we went there.

Talking to him was a lot of fun. We chatted about stupid things but got too know each other at the same time. He told me about some of the wrestlers backstage, what it was like and everything. He admitted how he had gotten too cocky and yes his ego became over sized but when they suspended him, he realized that if he kept going that way he's be out of a job soon.

I didn't tell him much about my present life. I did tell him about my dad leaving my mom alone with a baby when she was young, how my dad's family rallied around her and how Danni's mom, Auntie Kay, and my mom were best friends and were pregnant with both of us at the same time. I told him what it was like living with one parent and no other siblings but how I spent so much time with Danni that I considered her my sister.

When we got to the restaurant, we continued talking as we were seated and bread was served which I automatically dug into .

"So this is your favorite place?" he asked.

I nodded, giving him the bread. "They give you a 3 course meal with salad, and ice cream. Get the lasagna, it's awesome."

"Okay I will." He smiled, ordering for us both when the waiter came by.

"So why?" I asked, suddenly changing the subject.

"Why what?" He asked, lifting an eyebrow.

"Why did you come here?"

"I had time off, I wanted to talk to you where you couldn't sign off or hang up on me."

"umm you left me last time we hung up."

"You were saying the weirdest thing. So you really think I'm the hottest guy on the planet?"

"Well let's see it fell into the weird things I was saying. But you know I was always more of a Cena fan."

He pouted to which I rolled my eyes at. "Suck it up you big baby." I said sticking my tongue out at him.

We continued our banter as our food arrived and we both dug in. My appetite was back, although I was still fairly skinny, and by skinny I meant I had lost any curves I had before. I looked like a boy. But now that I could eat and keep food down, my love for eating had increased, so much so that I guess Randy was amazed.

"Where is all that going?" he asked.

I glanced up at him, my cheeks reddening.

"No I don't mean to embarrass you, a woman with a healthy appetite is good but look at how tiny you are." To emphasize his point he reached over and grabbed my wrist, holding it up as he wrapped his hand around it, his palm overlapping most of his fingers.

I reddened more, yanking my wrist away.

"High metabolism." I shrugged off, trying to appear non-chalant.

"I know all about that, He said. "But damn yours must be through the roof."

I shrugged as I pushed my plate away, a big smile on my face. "hurry up and eat then, I want some ice cream."

He finished soon after and the waiter delivered the ice cream. It was this special kind called spumoni that you could only get at this restaurant and I made randy close his eyes, feeding him his first bit of the green ice cream and watching his face lit up.

"Is that not the bestest ice cream ever?"

He nodded and we both finished off our ice cream Randy giving me most of his, complaining about not being able to eat too much . When the bill came we both fought over the bill until Randy demanded he pay, pointing out that I didn't have a job.

After we walked across to the theatres to see what was playing and just as luck would have it I ran into some old co workers. One of them running up behind me to give me a big hug.

"Lana, oh my god, I haven't seen you for ages. You cut your hair it looks cute short and where's Derrick?"

I smiled at Carrie. "We broke up a while back. Carrie this is my friend Randy. Randy, Carrie we used to work together here, and no this wasn't the place I quit, at least not recently."

"Nice to meet you." Carrie said, staring at him with a big goofy grin before turning back to me.

"So how come you haven't come to visit? I heard rumors but no one knew for sure, but damn if you haven't lost a lot of weight."

I shrugged. "Been busy, and u know how rumors are around here I'm sure they're all fake and I've been running a lot."

She nodded. "Well cool, I gotta get back to work, make sure you stop in to see Tim. He'll be so pissed if he found out you came by without coming to see him. 'sides I'm sure he more of those crappy magazines for you."

I snickered as she walked off and led Randy to the office.

"Magazines?" he asked.

I nodded, "the theatre shows the WWE Pay per view events and we're also sent the magazines which Tim gives me. Tim." I yelled getting his attention.

He turned and smiled at me, is eyes widening when he saw Randy.

"Hey did anyone ever tell you, you look like Randy Orton?" Tim asked with a smirk.

"I get that all the time. Anyone ever tell you, you look like Christian?"

Tim laughed, "Lana does all the time."

"Tim, meet Randy, randy Orton. Randy meet Tim, aka Captain Charisma."

I was sure Tim's jaw hit the floor.


	12. Chapter 12

This part is short.. why ? cuz it's a filler and pissing me right the fuck off and yes I'm cranky as hell you wanna know why/ go read my myspace blog.

--- --- ---

Title: Instant Messenger 12?

Author: Harmoni

Category: WWE

Rating: T for teen...cuz I like to swear hehehe

Summary: A nice messenger chat with WWE imposters becomes her way for escape. Cause that's all they were, Imposters. she wasn't that dense, she just wanted to pretend and play along cuz that's what they were doing.. Right?

Disclaimer: the OC's belong to me. wrestlers belong to the WWE and themselves,

Spoilers: Randy is suspended, and I'll prolly just make it up as I go along. I might follow some things that happen and discard the rest. My fan fic, my rules ha ha ha)

Feedback: Please

Author's Note: Ahem if this completely sucks, I'm blaming it on my feverish mind… I wrote this while sick. There is an explanation behind this story that I may perhaps share at a later date. I dreamed half of it but that's how a lot of my fics start...and before people go on about another Randy story…. SOOOO not my fault My Randy Muse is running rampant and SOOOO not my fault… please tell me what you honestly think it's written in 1st person which I usually don't do.

--- --- ---

"So what now?" Randy asked as we got back in the car.

We had just finished a movie and to be honest I was exhausted. It was a later movie as we had spent a lot of time talking to Tim and a few other old friends who were wrestling fans and didn't quite believe I was with Randy Orton. He ended up signing a lot of autographs and got his picture taken with Tim once I picked up his jaw from the floor. I wondered how much money I could get from that picture… how many people would actually know it's not the real Christian. Yeah that's how much alike they looked.

I let out a big yawn, leaning my head back against the head rest."I don't know about you but I'm tired. Put a fork in me I'm done."

He chuckled. "I'll take you home then."

I sleepily nodded my head. "Where are you staying?"

"I dunno, I'll just check into a hotel after I drop you off."

"Nuh-uh. We have a guest room, you can stay there."

"You're not gonna ask, just tell me?" He teased.

"Yeah, what's the point in arguing when we know in the end you'll say okay. How long are you in town for?"

"Day after tomorrow.""Cool." I murmured sleepily. "Let's do something fun tomorrow. It's been awhile."

I must've fallen asleep because the next thing I knew was me in his arms as Randy quietly talked to my mom before I heard her bedroom door close. Then he moved off to my room gently placing me on my bed.

"Thank you." I murmured.

"You're welcome sweetheart." He whispered placing a kiss on my forehead.

I smiled. "Can you stay for a few minutes, just until I fall asleep."

"'Course." He whispered, sliding in beside me.I cuddled in beside him and fell asleep with him stroking my hair.

'God I hope my wig doesn't fall off.' Was my last thought but I was too sleepy for it too cause much alarm.

--- --- ---

I woke up the next morning alone in my bed my wig still on, perhaps a little crooked.

Yawning I sat up, stretching my arms and wondering if yesterday had been a dream but as I went out into the front room, I saw Randy putting on his running shoes.

"I'm going out for a run, did you want to come?"

Ha ha ha that was hilarious I wouldn't even be able to make it to the end of the driveway before I keeled over and died. But just as I was about to laugh out loud, I hesitated remembering I had told Carrie that I run a lot now.

"I can't I twisted my ankle last week and am still not able to run on it."

He nodded in understanding. "I'll see you in a bit."

I watched him leave and go down the driveway and when he was gone, I ran for my laptop and quickly signed onto messenger, grinning when I saw Krista there.

**Lana: Holy hell, guess who showed up at my house yesterday**

**Krista: LOL Randy Orton?**

**Lana: Yes.**

**Krista: Bullshit. I was just kidding.**

**Lana: I'm telling you the truth.**

**Krista: I don't believe you.**

**Lana: Fine don't believe me but he's here and when he gets back from his run we're gonna go do something.**

**Krista: Where do you live? I'm coming over.**

**Lana: Lol nice try. But I have to go shower.**

**Krista: Did you tell him yet?**

**Lana: Tell him what?**

**Krista: You know what. About you.**

**Lana: No. I'm in remission. I'm fine, I'm better. He doesn't need to know.**

**Krista: Lana….**

**Lana: I gotta go, I'll ttyl.**

I quickly signed out and ran to take a shower, getting out just as Randy came back. Luckily I heard him or I would've walked out of the bathroom without my wig.

"You're hair is dry." He noted as I came out.

I shrugged. "I shower quick and dried my hair quickly. There're towels in the bathroom I just need to change."

He nodded heading off to the bathroom and I quickly changed into some draw string pants that at one point had been tight on me but were now kind of baggy and another long sleeve t shirt. I put a bit of make up and when I was done Randy had just finished changing as well.

"Anywhere you want to go?"

He asked.I eagerly nodded my head. "My mom got a ride in with Auntie Jane, Danni's mom, so we're free to take her car."

"You want to drive?"

I shook my head. "You heard my mom last night."

"Why doesn't she like you driving?"

I grinned. "'Cause I got into an accident in her car."

He laughed. "You're such a badass."

I rolled my eyes, "yes, I'm hardcore. Just watch out I'll be debuting in ECW before you know it."

He stuck out his lower lip. "I'm hurt you don't even want to come on Raw?"

"And risk you RKOing me? Forget it, unless of course I get to you before you get to me."

"Is that a challenge?" He asked with a raised eyebrow as he moved towards me with his hands up.

"Maybe." I replied sticking my tongue out at him.

He jumped at me and I backed up but he still wrapped his arms around me as he began to tickle my waist.

"Stop." I screeched, trying to back away. That just resulted in us falling back on the chair as he continued to tickle me.

"You give up?" He asked.

"No." I screeched.

"Say it."

"Bite me."

"Okay." He reached down and bit into my shoulder.

"Ow, you jerk." I cried while laughing.

"I wasn't serious about biting me."

"Then don't say something cause I'll do it."

"Then how bout getting off of me, you way a friggin ton."

"Oh sorry." He said jokingly letting all his weight fall on me.

I gasped in pain and he quickly sat up.

"Are you okay?"

I nodded. "Not used to having someone as heavy as you. Man you should go on a diet." I said trying to shrug the pain off with a grin.

He looked at me closely then shook his head as he stood up, holing a hand out to me.

Trying my hardest not to wince, I stood up and together we left the house.

--- --- ---

I took Randy to this place called Castle Fun Park. It was a place where they had indoor mini golfing, outdoor go-karting, bumper cars, a hockey shootout game, batting cages and an arcade upstairs.

We went go carting first and I pulled ahead of him cutting him off every time he tried to pass me. As we were going around a sharp corner he finally passed me, clipping my front end and sending me spinning out of control and crashing into the tires that were on the side. I was desperately out of breath and feeling dizzy from spinning and crashing. I was still super weak and easily winded and it pissed me off. This never would've happened to me before, I would've just pushed my go cart out and do it all over again but my legs felt like jelly and I couldn't even move.

"Lana, are you okay?"

I nodded as Randy pulled me out and placed me on my feet, except they couldn't hold me and as I started falling he quickly scooped me up.

"Put me down." I mumbled. "Let's just finish our race."

"You look shaken up." He pointed out.

I shook my head. "Bad memories."

"Why don't we go inside and play some mini golf."

I finally nodded and he walked back inside, not putting me down until we were getting our clubs and after we played a game where we didn't keep score, just played like big idiots, headed up to the arcade, playing game after game where we won loads of tickets.

Hours later we brought our tickets getting a whole bunch of stupid little prizes before leaving to go home as my mom had said earlier that she would make dinner for us.

--- --- ---

"I'll call you later."

"You don't have to."

"I want to."

"We can talk online."

Randy grinned at me. "That too. It was cool of your mom to drive me here. She must really not want you to drive."

"Yeah, something like that." I muttered, looking away.

Mom was waiting by the food court as I walked Randy to his gate. These past few days had been fun. I had forgotten all about being sick. I was a young adult again, hanging out with a friend and having fun. What did it matter that my friend was a super hot WWE star that I wanted in the worst way but refused to let anything happen between us. We still had fun

."Have a safe trip." I told him.

He smiled. "I had fun, next time, you can come down and visit me some time."

I laughed. "Yes hold on, let me pull out some imaginary money."

He laughed. "You tell me when and I got you covered."

I frowned. "I doubt my mom would like that."

"Lana you're 22."

"I'm her only child that she is protective of, talking about going into another country all by myself she will hate it."

"Then we'll bring Danni."

I sighed, "we'll see. Your flight is being called."

He reached over to give me a big hug. "Take care Lana and call me if you need me."

I returned his hug and watched him leave, turning around to wave one last time before he disappeared.

I frowned as I went to go meet my mom.

"Say your good byes?" She asked with a big smile.

I nodded, "He wants me to come visit him one time."

Her grin grew. "That's great honey. Just let me know when and we'll what we can work out money wise."

I knew she would willingly go for it. I lied to Randy when I said she would hate it, questioning if me visiting him would be a smart move. She thought this new friendship was wonderful and the best thing that happened to me. She also saw it as a stepping stone for me to get into the wrestling business. Yes, my mom was very supportive of whatever I wanted to do.

"He said he'll pay." I muttered

"You don't look that happy honey."

I shrugged. "A friendship with Randy Orton is probably not for the best mom."

"Why?" She asked.

"I never want him finding out about me. Promise me if this friend thing continues, you'll never tell him"

She stopped and stared at me. "Honey-"

"Mom please, I don't want him to know. I don't want anyone else to know. I just want to lead a normal life."

She sighed putting her arm around me. "If that's what you want baby."

"It is." I whispered as we stepped up to the window and I watched as his plane took off.

--- --- ---


	13. Chapter 13

--- --- ---

Title: Instant Messenger 13?

Author: Harmoni

Category: WWE

Rating: T for teen...cuz I like to swear hehehe

Summary: A nice messenger chat with WWE imposters becomes her way for escape. Cause that's all they were, Imposters. she wasn't that dense, she just wanted to pretend and play along cuz that's what they were doing.. Right?

Disclaimer: the OC's belong to me. wrestlers belong to the WWE and themselves,

Spoilers: Randy is suspended, and I'll prolly just make it up as I go along. I might follow some things that happen and discard the rest. My fan fic, my rules ha ha ha)

Feedback: Please

Author's Note: Ahem if this completely sucks, I'm blaming it on my feverish mind… I wrote this while sick. There is an explanation behind this story that I may perhaps share at a later date. I dreamed half of it but that's how a lot of my fics start...and before people go on about another Randy story…. SOOOO not my fault My Randy Muse is running rampant and SOOOO not my fault… please tell me what you honestly think it's written in 1st person which I usually don't do.

--- --- ---

It has been a couple months since Randy came to visit me. I gained back some weight, my hair grew back, I told everyone what I had gone through and everyone was okay and super supportive especially Randy who has already flown me to some of his shows and has come to visit me. We're together now, madly in love and getting married, and we live happily ever after……

Wow you actually believe that bullshit I just spewed out? I'm glad one of us did. My hair is like an inch long now but I still wear a wig most of the time. I gained back a bit of weight but still have a figure of a boy. I have no boobs for god sakes. I've told no one and I'm not going to , especially not Randy. Haven't gone to see him, he hasn't come back to see me. I lied and told him I was working again. We talk a lot online and when he's not at home or at a show, we talk on the phone. Trust me, I didn't want to see his phone bill.

He's fun to talk to and I talk to a lot of them now mostly Randy and John, who I've talked to on the phone a few times. I know Danni still talks to him online once in awhile and she says they're only just friends. I also talk to Trish a bit to. She's really cool and really sweet. An awesome role model. I told her that one time and she laughed at me.

I didn't even know Danni talked to Randy online until one day when he came on and asked me again to come visit him at one of his upcoming shows but I told him I couldn't I had to work.

**Randy: No you don't.**

**Lana: Yes I do.**

**Randy: All this time you never told me what you do.**

**Lana: I'm sure I did, I got my old job back in the call center.**

**Randy: Why are you lying?"**

**Lana: Why are you calling me a liar?**

**Randy: I just talked to Danni.**

I grew angry vowing this time to kill my cousin and her meddling ways, although it was my fault for not telling her in the first place.

**Randy: Why did you tell me you had a job?**

**Lana: Cuz I didn't want you thinking I was a lazy bum.**

**Randy: Or because you didn't want to come see me.**

**Lana: Or because I didn't want you thinking I was a lazy bum. I was just trying to fit in with my story when Danni got the time off I was going to tell you I did.**

**Randy: She said she has the week after next off.**

Curses! You blasted cousin.

**Lana: Oh guess she forgot to tell me.**

**Randy: So you'll come then?**

**Lana: I can't afford it.**

**Randy: I got it covered.**

**Lana: I don't feel right taking your money.**

**Randy: Consider it a loan and consider the tickets booked. I'll email you the information.**

Curses! You blasted stubborn WWE superstar. Can't you ever give up?

--- --- ---

"You better not be grumpy when we land." Danni warned me as we were on the plane to California.

I sent her a glare before turning into a big fake smile. My cheerleader smile as she calls it. Yes I used to cheerlead. We all make mistakes.

"Fake much?" Danni muttered. "You scowl way too much now."

"I'm doing it all now so I'm fine when we get off."

Over all I really didn't have much reason to look grumpy. I was getting to see Randy again. Okay that made me a little grumpy because I didn't want him finding out. But hello, free Raw events. They had house shows and Raw in the same area _and_ I would finally meet Jen and Krista who were both coming to Raw. I even begged Randy for some extra passes and he said he would see what he could do.

The plane landed and we disembarked, Danni warning me to be nice as we walked out. Hey I was fine when it was just Randy and I, she wasn't there.

I let out a small screech as I was lifted in the air from behind, taken by complete surprise. I turned my head expecting to see Randy but he was a few feet back a smile on his face as John held me in his arms.

"You could've given me a heart attack, you big oaf." I teased him stealing his hat off his head and putting it on my head.

"Aww Princess, I didn't know you cared." He grinned showing his dimples as he handed me off to Randy and gave Danni a big hug.

"I think that hats too big for you." Randy teased as I put my arms around his neck and gave him a hug.

"Well it ain't my fault someone has a big head." I replied with a big grin. "But he needs it to fit his oversized ego."

John turned around, an evil glint in his eyes. "Whaddya just say Princess?"

Randy put me down and I stood behind him. "Oh I think you heard me, or could the words not get passed your huge ego?"

He dived at me and I took off running across the airport, knowing he would catch me fairly quickly. He was a wrestler, I was still not in good enough shape where I could run fast. And sure enough 15 feet away, John grabbed me around the waist and swung me around, throwing me over his shoulder.

"You wanna repeat that Princess?"

"God have you gone deaf? Put me down."

"How bout no?"

I quit struggling. "Fine I'll just enjoy the view."

He stopped knowing exactly what I was talking about.

"I'll slap it." I warned him, lifting my arm.

"Damn woman." he complained, handing me off to Randy, who then put me down.

I stuck my tongue out as I lifted up my carry on bag.

"Plain evil." He muttered.

I grinned, picking that hat up and putting it backwards on my head. "I take it as a compliment."

Randy grabbed my bag from me. "Come on, we have to get to the arena."

"Are you guys fighting each other again?" I asked.

John nodded. "Triple threat. Edge is in it too."

"You two better play nice."

I noticed Danni looking at me like I had grown another head.

"What?" I asked.

"Cheerleader?" She questioned, wondering if I was being fake.

I shook my head, "nope told you I got it out of my system."

"Wait, who's a cheerleader?" John asked with a big grin.

"Lana used to be back in high school." Danni said.

"Ready, okay." I joked, putting on the fake smile and doing the hand movements, causing all 4 of us to burst out laughing.

"So what are we doing while you two are kicking the crap out of each other?" Danni asked.

"Watching backstage, or wherever you want." John replied with a shrug as we waited for out luggage.

"You look good." Randy said quietly to me.

"Thanks." I replied with a blush.

"No, I'm serious, you look, I dunno healthier and like you've put on weight."

"I don't think that's something you should say to a girl."

"No I mean you looked unhealthy skinny before but now you look really good."

"Well it's a good thing I don't get offended easily." I laughed. "But thanks I know what you mean. I feel better."

He smiled at me and we grabbed our gear, heading out to the rental car they had. I sat in the front while Randy drove and the other two were in the back, whispering too each other.

"So what else have you been up to besides pretending to work?" Randy asked with a raised brow.

I looked down. "Nothing actually. I'm just… umm having trouble finding a job."

"So why say you have one?"

"Because I didn't want you thinking I was a total loser."

"Lana, I don't and I doubt I ever will."

"Aww mushy moment." Danni yelled.

"You guys want some alone time?" John asked making kissing noises.

I sent them the middle finger as I looked at Randy. "And he's supposed to be the oldest one?"

"I know." Randy replied, a look of sadness on his face. "It's sad, it's really, really sad."

He was replied with a smack on the back of the head.

"Shut up Orton, you're worse then me, you're just trying to impress your girl there."

"Shut up John." I said, my face going red. "We're friends and only friends."

I turned back to Randy, ignoring the two in the back. "Remember how I told you my friends were coming to Raw on Monday?"

He reached into his pockets and pulled out two guest passes. My eyes widened as he again reached into his pocket and pulled out two tickets for front row seats.

"You didn't." I screeched, throwing my arms around him. He returned my hug with one hand as he tried to keep the car straight.

"Actually I didn't, John did. You two are here this weekend as my guests so John had to get these for your friends."

"Thanks John." I called back.

"What no hug for me?" he asked.

"No but I'm sure Danni would be happy to oblige."

"Shut up Lana."

--- --- ---


	14. Chapter 14

--- --- ---

Title: Instant Messenger 14?

Author: Harmoni

Category: WWE

Rating: T for teen...cuz I like to swear hehehe

Summary: A nice messenger chat with WWE imposters becomes her way for escape. Cause that's all they were, Imposters. she wasn't that dense, she just wanted to pretend and play along cuz that's what they were doing.. Right?

Disclaimer: the OC's belong to me. wrestlers belong to the WWE and themselves,

Spoilers: Randy is suspended, and I'll prolly just make it up as I go along. I might follow some things that happen and discard the rest. My fan fic, my rules ha ha ha)

Feedback: Please

Author's Note: Ahem if this completely sucks, I'm blaming it on my feverish mind… I wrote this while sick. There is an explanation behind this story that I may perhaps share at a later date. I dreamed half of it but that's how a lot of my fics start...and before people go on about another Randy story…. SOOOO not my fault My Randy Muse is running rampant and SOOOO not my fault… please tell me what you honestly think it's written in 1st person which I usually don't do.

--- --- ---

I nervously stood out back where most of the superstars usually entered, waiting for Krista and Jen. I was alone and unbothered as most of the wrestlers were already inside and the fans didn't see me as anyone important. I had told them to meet me at the back as I would be backstage but I hadn't told them that they would be too.

Danni was inside with the guys and I told them I was going to wait outside as no one would pay attention to me. Which was true, security even ignored me because of the pass around my neck. Randy gave me his cell phone and told me to call John if there were any problems with getting them in.

"Lana."

"Psycho."

I turned to the voices and saw two girls waving their arms wildly. I recognized them from their pictures and ran over to them. They wrapped their arms around me and practically pulled me over the barrier in a big hug.

"Can't breathe." I managed to gasp.

"Finally." Krista laughed. "I get to meet my little psycho."

I grinned. "Yup it's me and I told you I was different then my pics."

"Skinnier." She said wrinkling her nose.

" Not as skinny as a few months ago."

"So you gonna stay over there all night or are you gonna come hang out with us for a bit."

"I'm not coming over there but why not come back here." I said holding out two passes.

They both screeched as I handed them the passes and they moved past the security guards, proudly flaunting them.

"Psycho, how did you manage this?"

"Thank John and Randy. I begged them to bring you and he said he'll see what he can do and if you guys wanna scalp your crappy seats, go for it cause I got you better seats too."

They both stopped and stared.

"Lana, you so didn't have to do this." Jen said

"I know." I replied, "but I wanted to."

"Psycho, if you tell me you have Batista ready and waiting for me, I swear to god I will be forever in your debt."

I laughed, "sorry Krista, but he's on Smackdown."

We walked into the building and I paused trying to remember where the hell exactly I was.

"Ladies, I'm lost."

"Perhaps I can help."

We turned as Trish came towards us. I had already met her and we had hung out a bit over the weekend but that didn't stop Krista and Jen from staring in total shock.

"Randy's room?" Trish asked with a wink.

I nodded, motioning to my friends. "Trish this is Jen and Krista. They came to watch the show."

"Hey." Trish said warmly. "It's so good to meet you two. I was just on my way to Randy's so that works out good."

"This is so cool." I heard Jen whispered as we followed Trish down the hall and they spotted various superstars.

We entered Randy and John's locker room where they were both still lounging around now in their gear.

"You find them?" Randy asked.

I nodded stepping into the room so a still shocked Jen and Krista could get in.

"please tell me I'm not dreaming." Jen whispered.

"If so I don't want to wake up." Krista replied.

"Everyone, this is Jen and Krista. Ladies this is my cousin Danni, John, and Randy."

They all shook hands and I was sure they were going to pass out.

"You guys can sit down." John told them with a grin. "I don't bite unless provoked."

I rolled my eyes. "How bout not scaring the crap out of them right now. But seriously guys, sit."

They sat down on the closest bench and just stared.

"I think they're in shock." Danni laughed as I took up my seat beside Randy on the couch and he lifted my legs, laying them across his.

"You know Psycho, you told me this all along but part of me didn't believe it."

"Psycho?" Trish asked.

Jen nodded. "It's what Krista calls Lana."

"Why?" Randy asked.

"She found out I used to be a cheerleader, and thought I had to be psycho to go through something like that." I replied.

"I'm sure the Spirit Squad has room for you." John laughed.

He had been bugging me all weekend about cheerleading and each time I threatened him bodily harm. He didn't give up though, I swear that boy was just begging for it.

"Come on Cena, keep going and see what happens." I told him through clenched teeth.

"Ready, okay." He said mimicking my hand movements from the airport a few days ago.

I glared at him and stood up, going into an old taunting cheer.

"_You think you're cool,_

_You think you're class, _

_But don't you know, _

_I'll kick your ass."_

I ended the cheer with a slap to my ass.

He stared at me in complete silence before bursting into laughter. "Well Princess, that's loads better the Spirit Squad."

"You busy tonight?"

We all turned to the door to see Triple H leaning against the door, Shawn Michaels behind him.

"What for?" Randy asked.

"Oh my god." I heard Jen and Krista gasp staring in awe. That was me and Danni, Friday and Saturday night so I couldn't really blame them.

"A segment DX is doing against the Spirit squad. Creative wants them to challenge us to a cheer off so cheerleaders might help."

I blushed and shook my head. "No thank you, I don't want to go out there."

"Come on Princess, let's see your cheerleading skills."

I shook my head. "I really couldn't."

Triple H shrugged. "Perhaps another time then?"

"Come on Lana, it would be fun." Danni tried coaxing her.

"We could use all 4 of you if you come back again." Shawn said, "any way to save money, Vince would love."

"Maybe another time." I said still looking away.

The two nodded and walked away.

"Psycho, you just got the 4 of us on TV. Teach me some cheers."

"No I didn't and I'm not going on." I replied.

"Why not?" Jen asked "It would be fun."

"Then knock yourselves out but I'm not doing it." I snapped.

Everyone grew silent as the stared at me but I refused to meet anyone's eyes.

"Redhead." Jen whispered causing the rest to laugh.

I cracked a smile sticking my tongue out at her as Randy grabbed me and pulled me back down onto the couch.

"Hey." I cried, placing a hand on my head.

"Oh like you don't enjoy it." Trish teased.

I blushed. She wasn't lying but I wasn't going to say that.

"Hey Lana, we wanted to get some shirts before the show, can we do that?"

"Sure we can go now, Danni and I are sitting with you guys."

"Hey I got some shirts, none of you ladies want my shirt?" John asked, pretending to be hurt,

"I do." Jen said, blushing.

John laughed and went into his bag, tossing her a shirt.

"Hey I want a shirt." I cried.

"Here you can have mine." Randy said, taking of his shirt and giving it to me.

I wrinkled my nose. "This is used. And probably all sweaty."

"I didn't work out in it." He said with a pout. "Sides it's worth more cause I wore it."

"okay." I replied with an exaggerated sigh, slipping it over my head. "Don't I look cute."

"You do." He replied.

I smiled and stood up. "I'm guessing Krista wants a Batista shirt. She was praying he would be here tonight."

"Oh and a DX one. I have to get one of those."

"Good luck you three." Danni called as we began to leave.

"Yeah have fun." I told them waving as left.

"I can't believe this is real," Jen said. "Pinch me."

Both Krista and I reached over and pinched her.

"Ow." She cried.

"It's real." Krista informed her.

"Come on guys." I laughed as we slid out from backstage.

"So uh friends hey?" Krista slyly asked, smirking at me.

"That's all." Danni laughed. "She refuses to let anything happen. They even shook on being friends only."

I ignored them all as we reached the merchandise stand.

--- --- ---

"Okay so why did you get his hat again?" Danni asked as we made our way backstage.

"Cause he wanted to piss you off." I replied sticking my tongue out at her.

"That was unbelievable." Krista screeched. "That was just amazing, I've never seen anything so incredible."

"Of course cause you've never been front row." Jen giggled.

"Randy didn't even fight." I said with a pout.

"No, but he did get to RKO John." Danni laughed.

"But not before I got his hat." I shot back with a laugh.

"Which if ya ask me, I think I'll just take back."

A hand grabbed my hat and pulled and right away I could feel my wig being pulled as well. I reached up to snatch it back but it was too late, it was already being pulled off my head.

"Oh my god." I screeched, spinning around to take it back.

"Lana." Danni cried in panic.

"Oh shit." Krista whispered.

"uh oh." Jen said.

"What the fuck is going on?" John asked, holding his hat in one hand and my wig in the other.

--- --- ---


	15. Chapter 15

Ok so a few things, a few have asked what myspace link was and it's just the myspace url with /harmoni at the end.. I can't actually type it out properly as it will not show up on but without the spaces it www . myspace . com /harmoni.. just get rid of the spaces….feel free to add me…

Secondly I should've done this last chapter but me too tired… going back to the DX part, should I let the girls have a little bit of fun and make them cheerleaders? Just for a cheer off against the spirit squad? Lemme know, yay or nay

--- --- ---

Title: Instant Messenger 15?

Author: Harmoni

Category: WWE

Rating: T for teen...cuz I like to swear hehehe

Summary: A nice messenger chat with WWE imposters becomes her way for escape. Cause that's all they were, Imposters. she wasn't that dense, she just wanted to pretend and play along cuz that's what they were doing.. Right?

Disclaimer: the OC's belong to me. wrestlers belong to the WWE and themselves,

Spoilers: Randy is suspended, and I'll prolly just make it up as I go along. I might follow some things that happen and discard the rest. My fan fic, my rules ha ha ha)

Feedback: Please

Author's Note: Ahem if this completely sucks, I'm blaming it on my feverish mind… I wrote this while sick. There is an explanation behind this story that I may perhaps share at a later date. I dreamed half of it but that's how a lot of my fics start...and before people go on about another Randy story…. SOOOO not my fault My Randy Muse is running rampant and SOOOO not my fault… please tell me what you honestly think it's written in 1st person which I usually don't do.

--- --- ---

"You wear a wig? Are you some kind of guy?" John asked.

I stomped over to him and yanked my wig away, kicking him in the shins.

"Ow, what the hell was that for?"

"For calling me a guy, you asshole. Look just because I no longer have boobs doesn't make me a guy, I will have you know that I used to have boobs, I actually had a nice set of boobs until I got sick and lost a whole bunch of weight, starting with my boobs."

"What are you talking about?"

"Where's Randy?" I snapped.

"Prolly at his locker room." John replied, still staring at me.

"You can tell him now, Psycho."

I turned around and glared at all of them. "No." I snapped. "And if any of you think of even telling him, so help me god you'll regret it. Please just go back to the room and tell him… tell him I forgot something, I want to talk to John."

The three of them nodded warily but trudged off. I grabbed John's arm and yanked him off to the nearest room.

"You gonna tell me what's going on?" John finally asked as I paced the room.

I glared at him. "First off, this never leaves this room, got it."

"That all depends on what you have to say." He replied, his eyes narrowing back at me.

I sighed and threw my hands up. "There was a reason I kept you all at an arms length for so long. I didn't want any of you to know."

I turned around to face him but continued looking up, not meeting his eyes.

"When I first met you, online, I was sick. That's why I don't have a job, that's why I disappeared for weeks at a time."

"What did you have?" He quietly asked.

"Cancer." I quietly replied. "Leukemia. I was gone when I went in for my Chemo treatments and they made me so sick. The day before the house show I went into remission and now I'm trying to recover from it."

A few stray tears made its way down my cheek but before I could wipe them away, John was there brushing them away.

"Why didn't you say anything, Princess?"

I finally looked at him. "I didn't tell anyone online. Krista and Jen didn't even know until I went into remission. I wanted to lead a normal life, I didn't want anyone to look at me the way you're looking at me right now with pity."

"What else am I 'sposed to do?"

"Treat me no differently then before. It's done now, it's over, I just want to move on."

"That why you push Orton away?"

I sighed and pulled away from him. "You can't tell him John, you have to promise me."

"Princess-"

I turned my hard gaze on him. "I swear to god John if you tell him, I'm gone and out of here. I'll never talk to you or Randy again and while you may not care, considering Danni will also stop talking to you if she finds out you hurt me, and considering how stubborn and hard headed Randy is, he's gonna be a little pissed off that I've cut all contact with him because of you."

John's gaze hardened. "Now you're not being fair."

"I need to protect myself. If Randy finds out, he'll hate me, look how disgusted you were."

"I was shocked. If you brought it up to him 'stead of him accidentally pulling off your wig it'll be a lot better."

"No." I snapped. "please John, I know you barely know me and you owe me nothing but please don't say anything."

My hands were clasped in front of me as I stared up at him, begging him to help me, my eyes watering more.

"fine." He finally sighed. "I'll keep quiet now but you gotta tell Randy eventually, he needs to know."

"One day but not now. I can't just yet." I lied, knowing very well I would never tell him.

"Is that why you pushed him away?" John asked again.

I nodded. "If it ever comes back, the less people I hurt because of it, if I die the less people I leave behind, the better. I only have Danni and my mom and I was happy keeping it that way."

"But now you got us." John said, putting his arm around me. "Princess, Orton likes you, no matter what he ain't gonna give up on you. _If_ something were to ever happen we'll be there for you."

I smiled up at him through my tears. "no you won't John, cause you'll never know. I'd never tell you and I'd make sure Danni doesn't either."

He let out a frustrated sigh. "Anyone ever tell you, you were stubborn and hard headed."

I shrugged, stepping towards the door. "Once or twice."

"I didn't mean in the last hour." He muttered.

I raised an eyebrow at him as we walked down the hall.

"Hey you two, find what you were looking for."

We turned around seeing Randy there.

"Yeah." I replied, "I lost my bracelet."

I held up my arm, showing him the purple sparkly plastic bracelet Randy had given me after we went to Castle Fun Park.

Randy laughed. "You still have that."

"Yeah I happen to quite like it." I said.

"Hey Lans, are you okay?" He asked, noticing my red eyes. "You look like you've been crying."

I nodded. "I'm fine, John and I cracked heads while we were looking for this and him having a hard head and all he's fine, it hurt me though."

You know I was getting pretty good at this lying thing and it made me sad. I've always hated lying. I was the one who always told it like it was but not anymore. Now when it came to me I was closed up tighter then a clam.

"You sure you're okay?" Randy asked again.

I nodded, "Just a little dizzy."

I felt myself being scooped up and turned my head to glare at John.

"What are you doing?" I hissed.

"Looking out for you." He whispered before speaking louder in an attempt at a light hearted tone. "Princesses shouldn't walk especially dizzy ones."

I smiled up at John but my eyes were still blazing. "How sweet but just because I'm a _Princess _does not mean I should be treated any differently, I still want to lead a normal life."

"What the hell are you guys talking about?"

John shrugged, handing me off to Randy. "The Princess doesn't want to be carried so you can have her."

I stuck my tongue out at him as we entered their locker room and Danni, Jen and Krista let out a collective sigh of relief.

"What are you 3 so relieved about?" Randy asked.

"They must be happy I found my bracelet." I said, with a raised eyebrow at all of them. What, did they think I was going to kill John to keep him quiet. Yes I'd like to see me try and hide the body. I wouldn't even be able to drag him anywhere… and why was I still thinking about this?

"Awesome show tonight guys." I told them both. "And you can put me down now." I told Randy. "I feel like I've barely walked since I came here."

He put me down and I instantly flopped onto the couch, feeling emotionally drained after my confession to John. I closed my eyes and sighed, feeling someone sit beside me and ease me down so my head was in their laps. I opened my eyes and glared up at John but didn't say anything not wanting to draw Randy's attention to us.

"I'm gonna shower first." Randy said, grabbing some clothes, "I'll be out in a few."

As soon as he left I lifted myself up and glared at John. "What in the blue blazing hell are you doing?"

"You looked tired." He shrugged.

"You keep up stupid shit like that and Randy's gonna start thinking that there's something wrong or something going on between us."

"He knows?" Danni asked.

I sent her a look wondering why she'd ask a stupid question like that. "No Danni, I told John I was really a guy, which is why he has taken a sudden interest in me."

"I ain't gay." John said holding up his hands.

I rolled my eyes. "Sarcasm John."

"So are you going to tell Randy now?" Jen asked.

I glared at her. "No and neither will anyone else including John, right John?" I asked sending my elbow into his stomach.

"Yes." He gasped. "I told her I wouldn't say anything yet. She will tell him though eventually, it's part of our deal."

"Of course." I agreed with a smile, all the while rolling my eyes at the girls. Krista laughed causing John to move to look at me but I had an innocent smile on my face.

"How are you feeling?" Danni asked me.

I shrugged. "Fine. Why?"

"Well while you guys were gone, we were discussing going out to a club for a few hours."

My eyes widened in horror and I was about to pass when John interrupted.

"Is that safe for her? Will she be okay?"

"I'm fine, I'm not an invalid." I snapped. His hesitation just made me want to prove him wrong. "Let's go then, it'll be fun."

"Are you sure Princess, you shouldn't overdo it?"

I stood up. "Who are you, my mom? Look Cena I told you not to treat me differently but you already are so stop it. We're going and we're having fun, even if it kills us."

"How would us being killed be fun again." Krista asked,

"Why are we being killed?" Randy asked, coming out of the shower.

"We're not." I replied, "we're gonna have fun. As soon as John showers we're going to a club."

"Cool." Randy said as John stood up and grabbed his stuff.

As he went into the shower room he sent me another pitying look to which I shook my head at. How many times did I have to tell him? I didn't want his pity. And I really didn't want him looking at me like that. It just made me feel worse.

--- --- ---


	16. Chapter 16

You know this story was supposed to be short but at 16 chapters, I don't think it will… does anyone else mind?

--- --- ---

Title: Instant Messenger 16?

Author: Harmoni

Category: WWE

Rating: T for teen...cuz I like to swear hehehe

Summary: A nice messenger chat with WWE imposters becomes her way for escape. Cause that's all they were, Imposters. she wasn't that dense, she just wanted to pretend and play along cuz that's what they were doing.. Right?

Disclaimer: the OC's belong to me. wrestlers belong to the WWE and themselves,

Spoilers: Randy is suspended, and I'll prolly just make it up as I go along. I might follow some things that happen and discard the rest. My fan fic, my rules ha ha ha)

Feedback: Please

Author's Note: Ahem if this completely sucks, I'm blaming it on my feverish mind… I wrote this while sick. There is an explanation behind this story that I may perhaps share at a later date. I dreamed half of it but that's how a lot of my fics start...and before people go on about another Randy story…. SOOOO not my fault My Randy Muse is running rampant and SOOOO not my fault… please tell me what you honestly think it's written in 1st person which I usually don't do.

--- --- ---

As we entered the club, lights were flashing the music was pumping and I silently groaned. I could already feel a headache coming on. Damn my stubbornness. If I wasn't so stubborn I wouldn't have felt the need to show John that I was perfectly capable of going out even if I hated clubs.

"You don't want to be here." Jen whispered in my ear.

I shook my head. "I hate clubs."

"I knew it."

"John will you get out of my business and stop hovering around me like some mother hen." I snapped, beyond annoyed with him.

"Look, there's Masters." Randy pointed out making his way through the crowd the rest of us just behind him as we followed him to a table full of wrestlers.

Randy quickly introduced Jen and Krista as Danni and I had basically met everyone over the weekend.

"We're gonna get some drinks, what do you ladies want?" Randy asked.

"Margarita." Jen and Krista both said.

"Same." Danni agreed.

"Water for you?" John asked me.

I clenched my hands in my lap, trying my hardest to keep my temper in check.

"Pornstar." I snapped.

"What?" Randy asked.

"I want a pornstar. It's Bol's blue, Raspberry sour puss and 7 up. I want one of those."

I saw Danni give me a warning look but I ignored it. I really didn't want to be here.

"Come dance with us Lana." Jen begged.

I shook my head instead watching them leave and staying with Chris, Carlito, all 5 members of the Spirit Squad, Mickey, Trish, Victoria, Candice and Maria.

Eventually Mitch, Mikey and Nicky stood up and joined my friends on the dance floor as Trish leaned over to me

"So how are you sweetie?" She asked me over the music.

"Not too bad, great match tonight by the way."

"Thanks."

"Did you want to dance?" Chris asked me.

I was going to say no but I thought to hell with it if I'm gonna be stuck here, I might as well enjoy it.

"Sure." I replied, grabbing his hand and following him out to the dance floor.

"It's pretty cool you guys being here." He said as we danced.

I nodded. "It's s lot of fun. I never imagined in my wildest dreams-"

"That we'd be real?" He asked a teasing smile on his face.

I blushed. "Yeah I guess."

Someone tapped me on the shoulder and held out my drink. I turned around. Looking into the disapproving eyes of John Cena. He was about to open his mouth when I cut him off.

"That is it. Chris can you excuse us for a moment please?"

Chris nodded, confused as he watched me push Cena back. I pushed him all the way to the outside, gulping my drink down as I went and slamming it on a nearby table

"You." I growled, glaring up at him with my arms crossed.

"What?" He asked in all innocence.

"Am I gonna have to kick you in the shin again cause I will. I told you to treat me no differently, I begged you to treat me no differently. John, I'm in remission, The cancer is gone. I am getting stronger by the day and I want you to leave me alone. My mother hovers over me enough so please just stop. If you keep this up, Randy will find out."

"I'm worried about you." He softly replied.

"You don't have to be. I'm getting better, I just want to move on. Please help me."

John hesitated then nodded, looking down. "Fine I will."

"Thank you." I replied, giving him a hug. "Now, come dance with me."

We went back into the club and danced, Randy soon appeared and I turned to dance with him as John grabbed Danni.

"Everything okay?" He asked, handing me another drink.

I nodded. "I'm just really hot." I complained, slamming my drink back once more. "Let's just dance." I pulled him closer losing myself into the music.

"Did you have fun this weekend?" He asked.

I nodded.

"So we can still hang out?"

I laughed, putting my arms around his neck. "Of course. Just remember Randy Orton, you promised not to fall in love with me."

A few songs later, Randy pulled me aside. "are you okay? You look really pale."

I waved him off, turning away. "I'm fine."

I saw Danni move towards me.

"What's wrong, you look funny."

I waved her off too but she grabbed my arm, pulling me away.

"Did you even read the warnings on your medication?"

I gave her a funny look. "What are you talking about?"

"Can you even drink with your meds?"

I stopped. "I have no idea."

Danni rolled her eyes and grabbed my arm, dragging me off to the bathroom.

"Look at you."

She shoved me in front of the mirror and I looked noticing and feeling for the first time how clammy I was. My hair clung to the side of my face and neck as sweat trickled down. I was pale. Okay usually I'm pale but I was really pale, disgustingly pale.

"I don't feel-" I pushed Danni aside and ran for one of the stalls, not bothering to lock it as I leaned over the toilet emptying the contents of my stomach. Danni entered the stall rubbing small circles on my back, as I sobbed, thinking back to my chemo days and the endless retching I did then.

I heard the bathroom door open then a knock on our stall.

"Is everything okay?" Jen asked.

Danni opened the stall door, explaining what had happened and asking them to get something. They left as I miserably sobbed, everything gone as I continually dry heaved.

Jen and Krista soon returned and we all squished into the stall, me still on the floor. Danni took my purse from Krista and opened it, routing around in it before she came up with some of my medication.

"God dammit Lan." She swore, digging through my purse for more of my prescriptions.

"What is it?" Jen asked.

"Warning: mixing with alcohol can be harmful."

I sobbed harder.

"Shh, it's okay psycho." Krista soothed, rubbing my back now. "You're throwing it all up. You're getting it out of your system."

"I-I fe-feel like I-I'm g-going through ch-chemo again." I sobbed.

The door opened again. "Everyone decent?"

"John?" Danni hesitantly called.

"Yeah, I'm coming in."

He moved and stopped at the stall, his eyebrows lifting as he took in the scene.

"Princess, you okay?"

"No." I wailed.

Danni held up my meds. "Mixing bad." Was all she said as John took the pills and read the label.

He softly swore before handing the pills back.

"Why did you come in?" Krista asked.

John shrugged, "we couldn't find the girls so Randy, Chris and I drew straws."

Danni sighed, grabbing all the pills and putting them back at the bottom of my purse. "We need to get her back to the hotel. Lan, can you walk?"

I continued sobbing, my knees pulled up and my head buried in them.

"Is she okay?" John asked.

"Maybe it's all just affecting her at once."

I felt a pair of arms go around me and was being lifted into John arms. I balled his shirt up in my hands as I continued to sob into his chest.

We left the bathroom and was soon descended upon by Chris and Randy.

"What's going on?" Randy asked.

"Please." I whispered into John's chest.

"Danni told me she's not much of a drinker and she must've had a lot tonight, it made her sick and now she just wants to go lie down."

"I can take her back." Randy volunteered.

"You okay with that Princess?" John asked me.

I nodded, holding my arms out to Randy wrapping them around his neck as he gently took me in his arms. I buried my face in his chest, feeling miserable.

"You guys have fun, I'll look after her."

"Are you okay with that?" Danni asked me.

I hesitated before nodding, not lifting my head.

"We can just go home tonight." Jen said, referring to our plans to have them crash in our hotel room.

I shook my head.

"We'll see you guys later." Randy said as he carried me out through the club and hailed a taxi to take us back.

The whole way there he kept me on his lap holding me tightly as I whimpered, feeling nauseous in the back of the cab.

When we reached the hotel, instead of taking me to my room, we went to his. He put me on the bed but immediately I struggled to get up to go for the bathroom. Seeing this, he again picked me up and carried me there putting me down just as I made it to the toilet and began my homage to the porcelain god, Ralph, once again.

This time it was Randy rubbing circles on my back, making me sob more that he had to see me like this. Guess I'd never hear from him again.

When I was done, he got an extra toothbrush that he handed to me before stepping outside to let me brush my teeth. The guy just watched me puke my guts out and now what, he couldn't watch me brush my teeth?

When I was done, I sat on the side of the bathtub, my head in my hands as I groaned. I was so stupid. Why did I have to be so stubborn, why did I have to try and prove myself, it only resulted in me getting sick and looking like an idiot.

"Lana?" Randy called, knocking on the door before he entered. He came upon me sobbing once more and again he pulled me into his arms, carrying me to the bed and holding me on his lap until I calmed once more.

"Are you feeling better?"

I shook my head, struggling to pull away. "I'm going back to my room now."

"Why?"

"Why not? I look like a fool I don't even know how you can stand to be around me right now."

"How couldn't I? You're my friend Lana, no matter what. I've already shown you can't get rid of me."

"No matter what." I hollowly replied. But what if he knew? He'd hate me, I'd disgust him. Or worse, he would pity me and I didn't want him hanging around out of pity, or hovering over me. Look how John was and I had told him only hours ago. I couldn't tell him. Pity or rejection, I couldn't handle it either way.

"Why don't you lie down?" He said, easing me onto the bed. "There's no point in looking for your room key, Danni still has your purse."

He went to move away and I felt cold, I reached up, grabbing his arm, a pleading look in my eyes.

"you want me to lie down with you?"

I nodded and he lied down beside me pulling me closer. I buried my head in his chest and once again began to sob.

--- --- ---


	17. Chapter 17

--- --- ---

Title: Instant Messenger 17?

Author: Harmoni

Category: WWE

Rating: T for teen...cuz I like to swear hehehe

Summary: A nice messenger chat with WWE imposters becomes her way for escape. Cause that's all they were, Imposters. she wasn't that dense, she just wanted to pretend and play along cuz that's what they were doing.. Right?

Disclaimer: the OC's belong to me. wrestlers belong to the WWE and themselves,

Spoilers: Randy is suspended, and I'll prolly just make it up as I go along. I might follow some things that happen and discard the rest. My fan fic, my rules ha ha ha)

Feedback: Please

Author's Note: Ahem if this completely sucks, I'm blaming it on my feverish mind… I wrote this while sick. There is an explanation behind this story that I may perhaps share at a later date. I dreamed half of it but that's how a lot of my fics start...and before people go on about another Randy story…. SOOOO not my fault My Randy Muse is running rampant and SOOOO not my fault… please tell me what you honestly think it's written in 1st person which I usually don't do. And this is still unbetaed…. Come one girl, get ur damn internet back

--- --- ---

I woke up in the morning, alone and starving and not feeling as sick as I thought I would be. Randy was gone, and well I had emptied any food I had last night. Rubbing my eyes, I gasped, reaching up to feel that my wig was still fully intact, not even lopsided. I let out a sigh of relief, pausing to see if I could hear Randy in the room somewhere. He wasn't in the room but I could hear low voices talking outside of the room. I cautiously tiptoed over, looking through the peephole to see John and Randy talking. I put my ear to the door, listening to what they were saying.

"I dunno man, say what you want, but it's just this feeling I have." Randy was saying.

"Have you tried talking to her?" John asked.

"Yes and although she's hanging out and talking to me, I can't help but feel she's keeping me at arms length. Has Danni said anything to you?"

"Naw, nothing. Maybe she's still wary, cause y'know the rumors backstage about you bein' an asshole."

"I don't think that's it. There's something she's purposely holding back from me."

"And maybe it's all in your head cause you want this girl so bad and you don't get why she ain't falling at your feet."

I silently cheered. At least John was doing something right.

"OW, what the hell was that for?"

"Shut up Cena, it's not like that with her."

"uh oh Orton, you got it bad."

"I can't. She made me promise not to fall in love with her."

John let out a snort. "Yeah cause y'know you get to choose who ya fall in love with."

My eyes narrowed. I take back that praise, he was getting another kick in the shin.

"I know, I just wished I knew what was bugging her."

"Give it some time. And maybe you should take that food in before it gets cold."

I quickly scrambled back to the bed, pretending to be asleep when Randy came in, Breakfast in his hands.

This was not good, not good at all. What was I going to do?

--- --- ---

"Come visit again soon, okay?" Jen said giving me a big hug.

Krista pushed her away, wrapping me in a hug. "Psycho, call us when you get home okay."

I nodded as she stepped away and John stepped up, the pity back in his eyes.

"I'm worried bout you, you gonna make the trip home?"

I nodded but as he went to hug me I softly kicked him in the shin before putting my arms around his neck.

"I heard you this morning." I murmured so only he could hear me. "Please don't encourage him."

He pulled away and looked at me hard before sighing and stepping back. Now Randy stepped forward, pulling me into a big hug.

"Call me too, okay?"

I nodded against him. "Thanks for looking after me last night."

He looked down at me. "Anytime you need me to talk or anything, just call me."

I sighed and looked away, knowing what I had to do, knowing it wouldn't be easy but I couldn't let this go any further.

"Yeah, I'll see you later."

On impulse I grabbed him and held him really tight, praying the tears wouldn't come. He had been such a good friend since I met him. But I couldn't do this to him anymore.

"Come on Danni." I said, grabbing her arm and pulling her away from John. We waved at the 4 of them and went to board our plane.

"Are you okay?" Danni asked as we sat and I moodily stared out the window.

"Just peachy." I replied, watching the window where I could see John and Randy staring out at us.

It was fun while it lasted.

--- --- ---

"Princess are you feeling sick again?"

I looked at my mom and sighed. Only her and John ever called me Princess, I don't know why. But thinking about John made a sharp pang go through me as I thought about Randy.

"No mom, I'm okay."

"Baby, you've barely left your room."

"I'm tired Momma, that was a lot for me for one weekend."

She sighed, knowing that could very well be true but also knowing there was something else. Then again I've only been back for 3 days so she couldn't very well push me on the issue.

I hadn't gone on the internet and after the initial phone calls to say I was home, I hadn't taken anyone's calls, telling my mother I wasn't feeling well enough. I didn't have a cell anymore so I didn't have to worry about anyone trying to reach me on there.

"Danni called again."

"Tell her I'll talk to her when I feel better." I muttered turning over.

Mom sat down on the bed, running her hand through the inch fluff I had on top of my head.

"Did something happen Baby?"

"No." I whispered, ignoring the tears that stung my eyes. I didn't tell her what had happened at the club, I didn't want her worrying about me more.

My mom sighed again as the phone rang and she placed a kiss on my cheek as she went to answer it, leaving my door ajar.

"Hello…? No Randy she's still sleeping….I guess she must've caught a bug while visiting you… I'll let her know… okay you too, bye."

More tears came but I ignored them as I continued staring at the wall.

--- --- ---

"Princess, phone."

I kept my eyes closed as I faced the wall, keeping my breathing slow and even.

"No Randy, she's sleeping…. I'm sorry you seem to be catching her all at the wrong times… I'll let her know you called….

--- --- ---

"No, Lana is sleeping, can I take a message?... Krista?... okay I'll tell her you called…No she hasn't been well since she came back…. Oh you know? Just you and Jen? I wasn't aware anyone did… No that doesn't seem to be it…. Yes I'll let her know, thank you."

My door opened.

"That was Krista, all your friends are calling you."

"I have no friends." I whispered.

My mom was silent and I thought she had left but then I heard a sigh, then her footsteps walking away.

--- --- ---

"She's been like this the last few weeks." I heard my mom murmur. "She says she's not sick just super tired from your trip, and she doesn't seem sick but she's just not right."

I heard a sigh then recognized Danni's voice. "I'll talk to her Auntie Kim."

My door opened and I kept my eyes closed pretending to sleep.

"Lana?" My cousin called softly shaking me.

I groaned and rolled over, feigning sleep.

I forgot who I was dealing with.

My blanket then my bed sheet was yanked away and I finally opened an eye, glaring at my cousin.

"Bitch." I muttered.

"The mattress goes next." She warned me.

"What do you want?"

"To talk Ms. Mopey, let's go out."

I rolled my eyes. "Let's not and say we did."

"Why are you ignoring everyone Lana?"

"I'm not. Can't you just let me rest in peace? I'm still recuperating from cancer."

"Still, unless your little accident at the club hit you harder then you're willing to admit, you shouldn't still be in bed, tired. You should go to the doctors."

"And you should fuck off." I snapped, grabbing the blanket and throwing it over my head.

There was silence and I heard Danni leave, causing me to let out a sigh of relief, I didn't want to be bugged anymore.

"Time to wake up." A male voice said.

I gasped, lifting the corner of my blanket to see John looking down at me.

"Go away." I muttered.

"Is that any way to treat an old friend?"

I glared at him.

"I'll jump on you." He threatened.

"You'll break me." I replied.

He jumped onto my bed, narrowly avoiding landing on me.

"You gonna come out Princess?"

"Do I look like I'm going to?"

"Let's talk."

I stared at him before my hand slowly creeped out to my night table and moved around until I found a scarf. I pulled it back into the covers, my head also disappearing. I reappeared moments later with a black scarf on my head, I sat up, bringing my knees up to my chest.

"Why are you here?"

"Danni called me."

"And not Randy? Gee that doesn't sound like my cousin."

"Well I know, he doesn't."

"I thought for sure you'd have told him by now." I muttered.

"Are you feeling okay? It didn't come back did it?"

"No."

"You're not really sick, ya look fine."

I sullenly glared at him.

"You're pushing people away again, aren't ya Princess?"

I sighed but didn't answer him.

"You can talk to me ya know."

I warily looked at him, still not talking.

"C'mon Princess, what's going on?"

"I heard you guys." I finally said. "I don't want him falling in love with me John."

"Why is that so bad?"

"Because it's just wrong. I can be gone at anytime and to have him be there and watch me suffer. It's not right."

"Now you're just bein stupid. It ain't up to you to decide whether he sticks around or not. 'Sides, you're in remission. It's gone."

"For how long?"

John sighed, running his hand over his head as he stood up. "You know what I think it is Princess? I think you're scared. Scared of what may happen if you actually let down your wall and let people in."

My face flushed as I glared up at him.

"You're just worried about what may happen to you if you actually start to feel something for someone."

He left me staring after him in shock.

--- --- ---


	18. Chapter 18

Enjoy this dammit… why cuz I said so? Lol have fun….and please tell me what you think

--- --- ---

Title: Instant Messenger 18?

Author: Harmoni

Category: WWE

Rating: T for teen...cuz I like to swear hehehe

Summary: A nice messenger chat with WWE imposters becomes her way for escape. Cause that's all they were, Imposters. she wasn't that dense, she just wanted to pretend and play along cuz that's what they were doing.. Right?

Disclaimer: the OC's belong to me. wrestlers belong to the WWE and themselves,

Spoilers: Randy is suspended, and I'll prolly just make it up as I go along. I might follow some things that happen and discard the rest. My fan fic, my rules ha ha ha)

Feedback: Please

Author's Note: Ahem if this completely sucks, I'm blaming it on my feverish mind… I wrote this while sick. There is an explanation behind this story that I may perhaps share at a later date. I dreamed half of it but that's how a lot of my fics start...and before people go on about another Randy story…. SOOOO not my fault My Randy Muse is running rampant and SOOOO not my fault… please tell me what you honestly think it's written in 1st person which I usually don't do. And this is still unbetaed…. Come on girl, get ur damn internet back

--- --- ---

John left me a lot to think about and because of this I still didn't return anyone's phone calls. I wanted to be away so I could think, really think about what John said. Was I really that scared to open myself up? I don't know if I was but if it was true it was like I said, I didn't want anyone left behind if something were to happen to me. The time I was sick I had come to realize my own mortality. I could go at any minute, was it really fair for me to drag others into it? I ignored the smart part that was telling me anyone could go at any minute. You wake up in the morning you risk a chance of something taking your life. You step outside you can get hit buy a bus. I hated the practical side of me.

A week after my talk with John, I sat on my front porch swing watching cars drive by and kids laughing as they rode by on their bikes. It brought tears to my eyes remembering what it was like to be that young and innocent back when you thought you were invincible and no one could hurt you. How I wished for those days once again. But I knew no matter how much I wanted that, it could never be. I was now an adult ready to face the world. Well as much as one can who has had, I guess what you would call minor setbacks.

He was right you know, it wasn't up to me to decide who wanted to go or stay. So far since this whole debacle started I had been choosing. I chose to keep my mom and Danni near and I chose to shun my friends, to keep them far away so they wouldn't have to see me like this.

Then he happened.

And now my life was so upside down. It wasn't fair. But if anything, I of all people should know life it isn't fair. I never chose to get Leukemia and become sick. I never chose to meet the most wonderful guy but keep him at arms length because I was afraid of how he would react. I never chose to have my dad leave my mom so she struggled her ass off to give me all I had growing up, having her miss out on her own youth. Life wasn't fair but we had to deal with it and eat whatever dish life served.

I closed my eyes, pulling the blanket tighter around my shoulder and letting my head drop down as the tears fell. I heard a car pull up and someone get out but I ignored it thinking my mom was home from work.

The porch swing moved a little as someone sat down and put their arm around me as they pulled me closer. I knew it wasn't my mom, but that didn't matter, without opening my eyes, I knew who it was. I could smell his cologne on his shirt and feel his familiar hands as he wrapped his arms me and pulled me to his chest, one hand stroking the soft fluff of hair on my head. That's right, I wasn't wearing my wig but my hair was long enough now to classify as a pixie cut and it was starting to look kind of cute.

"You came." I whispered,

"No one's heard from you in weeks Sweetheart, everyone is worried."

"I haven't been feeling well." I choked out.

"You cut your hair." Was all he said.

I sighed, burying myself deeper into his side, he finally pulled me onto his lap so I was facing him.

"Why are you crying?" He asked lifting my chin to look at him.

I shrugged, pulling my chin away and leaned against his chest.

"I'm so tired." I whispered.

"You want to go back inside?"

I shook my head, not elaborating on what I was tired about. Perhaps he knew I wasn't physically tired but I couldn't tell him. I just couldn't.

I looked up at him, my large blue eyes pooling with unshed tears as he stared down at me and I could see the affection, the understanding in them. I could see how much he cared I wouldn't be lying if I said it scared the shit out of me.

Something must have been different in my eyes because something in his changed too as he slowly brought his hand up and gently traced his thumb across my cheekbone, then lightly across my lips as his eyes moved down to stare at them.

"Lana." He whispered. "I think I'm going to kiss you."

His eyes moved back to mine as I held my breath and watched him stare at me, wondering if I was going to stop him. When I didn't protest, his thumb went back to tracing my cheek, his head slowly moving closer, our lips almost connecting.

"Is this okay?" He asked.

"I might not be good at it." I whispered back, my eyes never leaving his.

"I don't think that's possible."

He moved closer and just as our lips made the barest contact, a car door slammed making me jump and pull away.

"Hey Baby, Randy, can you kids help me with the groceries?" My mom called.

I stood up, refusing to meet Randy's eyes as I went to go help my mom.

--- --- ---

"Out." I shooed both my mom and Randy out of the kitchen as I went back to preparing dinner.

I offered to make dinner that night for everyone, using it as an excuse to stay far away from Randy.

Yes I was a chicken, and no I didn't need reminding.

What happened on the porch, well it scared me. Scared the crap out of me so bad, I didn't even know what to do next.

If that kiss happened, there was no going back. There was a higher chance he would find out and he would hate me even more for not telling him. I think it was past the point where I didn't want him despising me for what I had or his pity. Now it was if he found out he would be royally pissed he didn't know before, but something inside me still couldn't tell him. I was still too scared.

Turning the noodles off I drained and rinsed them, turning back to the stove to add the alfredo sauce and chicken, mixing it all together to create my special chicken fettuccini alfredo. I dare someone to find something better. And yes, I'm very modest.

Moving it out to the table, I called my mom and Randy for dinner.

"This smells awesome." He said as soon as he entered, giving me a big smile.

I smiled back at him, taking a seat across from him.

"Looks wonderful as always, Baby." My mom said, placing a kiss on my cheek.

We ate mostly in silence, making small talk. When we were finished my mom shooed us away saying she would clean up.

"You want to go sit outside on the front porch?"

I shook my head "let's go for a walk."

I grabbed a light jacket ad we began to walk down the road heading towards the park.

Hesitantly he reached over and grabbed my hand, lacing his fingers through mine. I gave his hand a small squeeze, letting him know I was alright.

Entering the park, I walked us towards the small pond that was in the center and sat on the bench pulling him with me, leaning my head against his shoulder as I let out a content sigh.

"You okay Lans."

I nodded, watching the ducks swim.

"Thanks for coming." I whispered.

"Have you really been sick?"

I nodded, just not telling him when exactly I was sick.

"Why did you cut your hair?"

I ran my hand over my short hair. "Time for a change."

"It'll take some getting used to but I think it looks good. Are you better?"

"For now."

I lifted my head and stared at him. "Randy, there's something you need to know, I-"

"shh." He placed a finger against my lips. "If you're going to say what almost happened earlier was a mistake, then you're wrong Lana."

"I-"

He quieted me again. "I want to finish what we started and if you still think its wrong then we can talk okay?"

I nodded, closing my eyes as he leaned closer and his lips touched mine. I gasped and leaned closer as he wrapped his arms around me. His tongue ran across my lips and I opened my mouth granting him access as he pulled me onto his lap. My arms went up around his neck and we didn't pull away until we were both out of breath.

"Wow." He said, leaning his forehead against mine.

I nodded too breathless to speak.

"So was that wrong?"

I shook my head. "Never was gonna say it was. You assumed it."

"Come visit me again?"

I nodded, knowing there was no point in putting it off again.

"So what were you going to tell me?"

I wrapped my arms tightly around his neck.

"Nothing" I murmured.

How was I supposed to tell him? He would hate me now for sure.

--- --- --

Since everyone was going nuts, a nice little bit of fluff )

Just remember, I'm evil….take it how you want.


	19. Chapter 19

Huh Well this took awhile me is sorry, but guess what, I'm sick again.. so maybe faster updates Lol. Part of the cheer you'll recognize some is from me.. yes I admit it I used to be a cheerleader hides head in shame oddly enuf, ppl laugh when I tell them that.. I don't get it hehehe

--- --- ---

Title: Instant Messenger 19?

Author: Harmoni

Category: WWE

Rating: T for teen...cuz I like to swear hehehe

Summary: A nice messenger chat with WWE imposters becomes her way for escape. Cause that's all they were, Imposters. she wasn't that dense, she just wanted to pretend and play along cuz that's what they were doing.. Right?

Disclaimer: the OC's belong to me. wrestlers belong to the WWE and themselves, Part of the cheer is from Bring it On and the other part is from me… yes I admit it I used to be a cheerleader hides head in shame

Spoilers: Randy is suspended, and I'll prolly just make it up as I go along. I might follow some things that happen and discard the rest. My fan fic, my rules ha ha ha)

Feedback: Please

Author's Note: Ahem if this completely sucks, I'm blaming it on my feverish mind… I wrote this while sick. There is an explanation behind this story that I may perhaps share at a later date. I dreamed half of it but that's how a lot of my fics start...and before people go on about another Randy story…. SOOOO not my fault My Randy Muse is running rampant and SOOOO not my fault… please tell me what you honestly think it's written in 1st person which I usually don't do. And this is still unbetaed…. Come on girl, get ur damn internet back

--- --- ---

"Hello?"

"_Hi can I speak with Lana please?"_

"Speaking."

"_Hi Lana, I met you at Raw last month when you came to visit Randy and John."_

"Okay…"

"_This is Hunter. Triple H."_

I was silent as a smile grew on my face and I burst into laughter.

"_What's so funny?"_

"John quit being a nimrod."

There was silence.

"_Actually it's really Triple H."_

My laughter died down as I realized that wasn't John's voice and I let out a squeak of surprise.

"_John did give me your number, I asked him to talk to you guys but he said I was on my own with this one."_

"This is bizarre." I muttered to myself. My life was getting more weird by the week.

"Who is it?" Danni mouthed. She was over for the night and we were just sitting around discussing our plans for the upcoming week. We were leaving tomorrow to meet up with Randy and John for more house shows and Raw.

"Triple H." I mouthed back.

Her eyebrows shot straight up into her hairline.

"What can I do for you?" I asked him out loud.

"_Remember a few weeks ago when Shawn and I asked you and your friends about that cheer off?"_

"Oh. Ooohhh. No, no way."

"What?" Danni asked.

"He wants us to do that cheer off thing."

Danni vigorously nodded her head but I turned away from her.

"That's nice of you to think about us, but I can't get Krista and Jen to Raw too."

"_Consider it taken care of."_

The phone was yanked away from me and Danni moved out of reach.

"Triple H? Is this really you?...Ignore my cousin, she'll do it, we'll do it. We'll be visiting this weekend so if we can get the others there tomorrow as well to practice, you got yourself a squad…. Uh-huh…Awesome…. Yeah we can meet up with you before the shows….I'll make her choreograph something…. Okay, see you then."

She hung up, a triumphant smirk on her face as she turned to face me.

"You Bitch." I cried.

She tossed me the phone. "You better call Jen and Krista, then tell them to call Randy or John to get their flight info. Oh and you better start coming up with some insulting cheer for the spirit squad. He says we have to run it by creative but as long as there isn't too much nudity or swearing it should be fine."

"I'm not getting naked."

"He meant for them, you know like mooning but said if we want to take our shirts off that's okay too."

I raised an eyebrow at her, "Please tell me you're kidding me.My shirt is staying firmly on. Hello ugly scar chest?"

"He said it's up to us so let's see what you got."

"I don't even remember agreeing to this."

"That's why I'm here."

"I can't think of something by tomorrow."

"Don't you have an old routine?" Danni asked.

"Not one I could teach you three in 3 days." My eyes drifted to the TV screen where _Bring It On_ was currently playing. I had a good idea that just may work.

--- --- ---

This time when Danni and I got off the plane, I jumped into Randy's arms, my legs wrapping around his waist.

"Happy to see me?" He laughed, placing a quick kiss on my lips.

"Not at all." I replied as I jumped off and turned to give John a hug.

"How come I don't get that treatment?" he replied with a pout, running his hand over my short hair. "Cute." Was all he said.

"Kinda like the rest of me. Jen and Krista here?"

Randy pointed to a couple chairs where they were sitting eagerly waiting for us to finish saying hi to the guys. I ran over to them, throwing my arms around both of them.

"I can't believe you did this Psycho?" Krista said, excitement in her voice.

"I didn't. I said no, Danni said yes."

Krista turned and hugged my cousin. "This is the most incredible thing ever."

"You do realize we're gonna be in cute little cheerleading outfits."

She made a face. "I am willing to make a sacrifice."

"Did you come up with something?" Jen asked me.

I nodded. "Yeah we're going to the arena and I'll show DX and creative what I have. If it's given the go ahead I'll teach you guys."

Following the guys we went out to the SUV they had rented, John and Danni in the front, Krista and Jen in the middle with Randy and I in the back. Once settled, his arm went around me, and I snuggled into his side.

"How've you been?" he quietly asked.

"Mm, fine." I whispered, leaning up to give him a kiss on the cheek.

"You excited about Raw."

"I don't want to trip or something embarrassing."

"You won't you'll do fine with all of it."

The way he said it, made me glance suspiciously up at him.

"What are you hiding Randy Orton?"

He gave a mysterious grin. "Nothing at all Lana Mitchell."

"Boo on you." I said knowing he was lying and he knew something I didn't, but he refused to say anymore.

I took a deep breath, unable to believe this was all happening. I steadied my shaking hands, waiting on the Gorilla as the Spirit Squad did their cheer.

This weekend had been crazy, my cheer had been given the go ahead but more had been added, and there was to be a match after with the Spirit Squad against DX and Cena with Randy doing a run in to continue his feud with John. But, and here was the kicker, we as DX's cheerleaders were to stay at ringside and would warn John about Randy, leading him to come after us.

Could you believe we weren't even getting paid for this?

I don't think anyone cared, they were all super excited that they would get to do this, even if I was the only actual cheerleader going out there. That basically made me the captain and the one starting off, which made sense as I was the only one able to do what I was about to do.

I didn't even know I was still capable of it. I kind of amazed myself how easily I fell right back into it. Mind you I cheerleaded for 5 years. The only 8th grader to make it on the squad, I was captain in grade 11 and 12, but after I graduated I didn't carry on with it. I didn't see a future in it. Right, I silently laughed at myself, because I was doing oh so much now.

I gave the girls one last hug, giving Randy and John a shaky thumbs up as DX's music began to play. We were a surprise and DX wouldn't be coming out with us. Instead catching the Spirit Squad by surprise behind them.

All our hard work better pay off, we practiced like crazy I even threw in a small lift, which had me going in the air as I was the smallest now, damn weight loss. But besides that I had made the choreography quite simple, with simple hand gestures but to put it all together and in sync was extremely difficult. Except after shows, we had barely spent time with the guys, as soon as we awoke, we were in the gym working and practicing.

"kick some ass." My cousin whispered as the intro finished and I stepped out.

The ramp was flat, thank god, and when I stopped at the top, trying my damndest not to faint, the crowd went silent, taking in the skinny red headed cheerleader in a small black pleated skirt with green trimming and a long sleeved v neck top to match the skirt.

"Who the hell are you?" The Spirit Squad yelled at me.

I grinned and held up a finger telling them to hang on, then I took off at a run, going into a round off, 2 back handsprings, followed by a twist and landing in a split, my hands held up in a V, a big smile on my face.

I didn't move until I heard the others coming out of the backstage cheering. When they reached me, I jumped up and grabbed my Pom-poms from Jen and we got into formation.

"DX squad ready?" I shouted, my voice being picked up on the small headset I had on.

"Ready." They shouted back.

"What?"

"Ready."

"What?"

"Ready."

"Okay." We all shouted.

The spirit squad looked on warily, wondering what DX had up their sleeves.

We began our routine which, yeah I ripped off from Bring It On.

_We're sexy, We're cute, _

_We're popular to boot,_

_We're bitchin', great hair, _

_The boys all love to stare_

_We're wanted, We're hot,_

_We're everything you're not_

_We're pretty, We're cool_

_We dominate this room_

_Who are we, just guess_

_Guys wanna touch my chest_

_We're rockin', we smile_

_And many think we're vile_

_We're flyin', we jump_

_You can look but_

_don't you hump, whoo _

_we're major, we roar_

_We swear that we're not whores_

_We cheer and we lead_

_We act like we're on speed _

_Hate us 'cause we're beautiful_

_Well, we don't like you either_

_We're cheerleaders_

_We are cheerleaders._

One by one we stepped forward and did fancy hand movements.

_My name is Danni, _

_And I am Krista_

_You got Jenny_

_And here I'm Lana_

_Spirit Squad,_

_You think your class_

_But DX'll come_

_and kick your ass._

Here, Krista and Jenny boosted me up so my feet were at their shoulder height my arms held up, as they stared on in awe. We continued on;

_So Spirit Squad_

_You better check_

_And look behind,_

_Here comes DX._

I jumped down into the waiting arms of Jen, Krista, and Danni as we clapped and cheered and kicked, shaking our pom-poms.

One by one they realized what we said and slowly turned around, right into kicks from DX who had snuck in from behind. The rest of the Spirit squad jumped on top of them as Jen and I stepped to one side of the ramp and Danni and Krista stepped to the other side, shaking our Pom-poms in front of us as John ran down the ramp, giving me a small wink as he ran by and slid into the ring.

We went into DX and John's corner as a ref came down and the bell rang to start the match. I had to admit it was kind of like being back in high school as I led the girls in short easy chants, angering the Spirit Squad even more. They were just jealous because we were better.

Later, all but 2 member of the Squad were down, Triple H was in the ring with one of them, Shawn was laid out beside the ring and John was reaching in for the tag.

That's when we saw Randy come down.

"John, look out." We screamed.

He turned around landing a flying cross body on Randy and they both went down. John quickly stood and stepped onto the apron in time to receive the tag, Triple H rolling out of the ring, exhausted.

We cheered but our cheers soon turned into screams as Randy advanced on us, we ran around the ring, only to be met by two member of the Spirit Squad. We huddled together, our eyes wide with fear as we looked between them.

Then Shawn was there, attacking the Spirit Squad and John grabbed Randy, laying into him with forearms, we ran away huddling at the foot of the ramp until John went back into the ring for the pin, winning them the match.

When their opponents were rolled out and all three men standing, they motioned us into the ring where we got in to celebrate with them as Raw went off air.

We made our way backstage, squealing and hugging each other as soon as we got through the curtains.

"That was incredible." We all screeched.

Hunter and Shawn gave us all quick hugs.

"Thanks for the help." Shawn said, "You guys did great."

"No thank you for asking us." Danni spoke for all of us.

John swooped us all up into hugs, spinning me around when he got to me. "you bout damn near gave me a heart attack with your little flippie thingie and air time."

I rolled my eyes. Nobody but DX and creative had seen my opening segment and the whole cheer complete with the lift. "Told you I was a cheerleader, numbnuts."

"Well hey I dunno about my nuts being numb."

I gave him an evil grin, "Would you like me to ask Danni?"

He blushed. Yes John Cena actually blushed. "Smart ass."

Arms went around me from behind. "I watched the whole thing, You were incredible."

I grinned turning in Randy's arms. "You sound surprised."

"I didn't know you were a gymnast, or so flexible." He raised his eyebrows an evil smirk on his face.

I punched him in the arm but I wasn't really mad at him. Actually I was ecstatic. Everything was great. My boyfriend was one of the hottest WWE Superstars, I was good friends with other Superstars, I got to go to WWE shows, I got to be part of a WWE show, my cancer was gone and I was happy, really truly happy.

What could possibly go wrong?


	20. Chapter 20

I think I almost cried when I wrote this… stupid Harmoni…

--- --- ---

Title: Instant Messenger 20?

Author: Harmoni

Category: WWE

Rating: T for teen...cuz I like to swear hehehe

Summary: A nice messenger chat with WWE imposters becomes her way for escape. Cause that's all they were, Imposters. she wasn't that dense, she just wanted to pretend and play along cuz that's what they were doing.. Right?

Disclaimer: the OC's belong to me. wrestlers belong to the WWE and themselves, Part of the cheer is from Bring it On and the other part is from me… yes I admit it I used to be a cheerleader hides head in shame

Spoilers: Randy is suspended, and I'll prolly just make it up as I go along. I might follow some things that happen and discard the rest. My fan fic, my rules ha ha ha)

Feedback: Please

Author's Note: Ahem if this completely sucks, I'm blaming it on my feverish mind… I wrote this while sick. There is an explanation behind this story that I may perhaps share at a later date. I dreamed half of it but that's how a lot of my fics start...and before people go on about another Randy story…. SOOOO not my fault My Randy Muse is running rampant and SOOOO not my fault… please tell me what you honestly think it's written in 1st person which I usually don't do. And this is still unbetaed…. Come on girl, get ur damn internet back

--- --- ---

I hummed as I ran a comb through my short damp hair, staring at the mirror, happy with how much better I was looking.

I was at home again. We left on the Tuesday and Randy said he would come visit me soon. Ever since I saw him again I felt like I was floating, my feet were barely touching the ground.

"You seem happy." My mom mused as she stopped in the doorway.

I grinned at her in the mirror. "I am momma. I like him, I really do."

She smiled, happy that I was finally happy.

"Have you told him yet?"

My smile turned to a frown. "Is it really that important?"

She sighed, a sad look in her eyes. "You know it is baby, he has a right to know."

"Momma I'm happy again, everything is going great, if I tell him he'll hate me."

She stepped up behind me wrapping me up in a big hug.

"I don't think it's possible for anyone to hate you Princess, and I know he won't."

"Why?" I timidly asked

"Because you're beautiful inside and out. All he cares about is what's inside. This won't be important to him but he should still know."

I sighed knowing she was right. "I'll tell him. I will, please just give me a little bit more time."

She nodded, placing a kiss on my cheek before she left.

"I'm glad to see you smiling again Princess," She said before she left me there, my smile long gone, in its place a frown as I stared at myself in the mirror.

--- --- ---

**John: I know he's on is way there now. Are you going to tell him?**

I frowned at my computer screen. The thoughts have been mulling around in my head for the past couple weeks. He had a right to know but if I was going to tell him I wanted it to be face to face and on my terms I didn't want everyone, i.e., John, Danni, my mom, Krista, Jen, telling me or pressuring me to do it

**Lana: Look John I'll tell him when it's time okay. Please don't bug me about this right now.**

**John: Are you okay Princess?**

**Lana: Yes I just haven't been sleeping well lately. I think I'm just stressed from worrying about how he will react.**

**John: He'll be fine, the guys crazy for you.**

**Lana: Crazy enough to not hate me when he finds out?**

**John: I think so.**

**Lana: How can you be so confident? Did you tell him already?**

**John: No I swear I didn't.**

**Lana: He's here.**

**John: Good luck and call me if you need me for anything.**

**Lana: Of course, thanks John.**

**John: No prob Princess.**

I nervously shut my laptop and threw open the front door, jumping into Randy's arms as he picked me up and spun me around placing me down with the sweetest most heart melting kiss. But damn if this boy couldn't kiss.

"Miss me?" I teasingly asked.

"Of course." He said, giving me another kiss.

I grinned up at him, my arms wrapping around his neck. "I missed you too."

"You all alone?" He jokingly asked.

"Are you trying to seduce me?"

He gave me another kiss. "Is it working?"

I grinned and pulled away going back inside. "no, but I will let you take me out to dinner."

"with Pleasure." He said following me inside.

"I didn't make reservations." I called to him as I went to change.

"That's fine, I did."

My head poked out of my room. "Where? You don't know this city."

"I asked Danni."

"Where at?"

"I'm not telling you."

"I hate surprises." I grumbled as I reappeared, wearing a knee length skirt and a green top.

He whistled appreciatively, causing me to blush.

"Why are you blushing?" He teasingly asked.

"Why are you whistling?" I shot back.

"Because you're looking gorgeous, and your face is now matching your hair."

I whacked him on the shoulder but he grabbed my hand, frowning down at the inside of my arm.

"What's that?" He asked.

I followed his gaze to where a large purplish bruise was.

I shrugged. "no clue."

"You don't remember how that happened?"

I shook my head. "No, knowing me, I walked into something. I'm clumsy."

He dropped my hand, believing that I had no clue how it happened. I didn't know. I may have had a small idea what it could mean. But I was clumsy. There's a good chance I just walked into something.

--- --- ---

"This is, this is really wow." I whispered as we ate our food.

He had taken me to Harbour Center, which was a revolving restaurant overlooking all of Vancouver. The view was breathtaking both inside and out.

"Dance with me?" He asked, standing up and holding a hand out to me. I blushed, shyly taking his hand as he led me to the dance floor.

"You really do look beautiful." He whispered as he pulled me to him.

"You're not so bad yourself." I teased him, leaning my head against his chest. "Thank you for this. You'll never know what it means to me. Just you coming into my life."

He leaned down and kissed me. "You'll never know what you've done for me since you came into my life."

"Driven you nuts?" I teasingly asked.

"Well that too." He agreed.

I pretended to look hurt and stuck out my lower lip which he bit, sucking it in. I responded with another kiss before wrapping my arms around his neck tighter as his arms pulled me closer.

"This right here." I said, "I never want to forget this."

"Nor do I," he replied. "And we won't"

I sighed, closing my eyes, content with the world.

--- --- ---

I woke up a few weeks after that night feeling sick to my stomach. Groaning, I swung my legs over the bed and gasped at the huge bruise on my leg, lifting the sleeve on my arm I saw the bruise that Randy had pointed out was still there.

Immediately my breathing became shallow as I tried not t think about what it meant.

"MOM." I screamed.

She was in my room within 2 seconds, followed by Danni who looked like she had just arrived.

"What is it Baby?"

I held my arm out.

"Did you hurt yourself?" Danni asked.

I pointed to the bruise on my leg.

"No." My mom gasped, dropping to her knees beside me.

I nodded, feeling numb.

"Perhaps you did just hurt yourself." Danni hopefully suggested.

Again I nodded, knowing it wasn't true.

--- --- ---

"Are you sure?" I asked again, begging the doctor to give me some other news. Anything really but this.

"I'm so sorry Lana. We ran all the tests."

"Run them again." Danni snapped, looking angry.

Doctor Cortez sighed, running a hand over her face. "Trust me Danni, if there was anyway I thought these tests were wrong I'd run them again but they are very accurate. I don't want to see Lana go through this anymore then you do. I've known her, her whole life, and I know this is unfair."

A bitter laugh escaped me. "No, unfair is me thinking I could lead some sort of normal life."

"You can still lead a somewhat normal life." Dr. Cortez told me.

"How?" I asked. "last time the Chemo made me so sick I never went out anywhere. I was just getting over it last time and for it to happen again…."

I trailed off unable to go on. I wanted to cry so badly, to scream and shout. To throw stuff, to hit something, to have Randy here beside me. But I couldn't, I was numb. Danni had the anger part covered and my mom, she was crying, unable to believe this was happening again and Randy still had no clue.

"Will she be going back on Chemo?" My mother tearfully asked.

Dr. Cortez shook her head. "we feel her body won't respond to the Chemo treatments the way it should. Her best bet would be a Bone Marrow transplant. We'll test you Mrs. Mitchell to see if you're compatible."

"And if she isn't?" Danni asked, her voice deadly calm.

"We would try you or any other relatives she has." She explained. "Usually a parent or a sibling would be the best bet-"

"Thanks _dad_." I muttered, thinking this was something else he screwed up.

"-If we can't find someone compatible, we would have to look for an outside donor although it's a lot more difficult and tricky, plus there is a higher chance her body will reject the Marrow."

"and if we can't find a donor?" I asked, afraid to hear the answer.

"Then we can _try _Chemo and Radiation and hope for the best."

I numbly nodded and stood up motioning for Danni and my mom to follow.

Once outside Danni pulled out her phone. "I'll call John and tell him to cancel our flight tomorrow."

I shook my head. "I want to go. God only knows when I'd get another chance, I want to go and have fun."

"will you tell them?" Danni hesitantly asked.

"No." I whispered looking up at the sky. "I'm not going to tell them and neither are you. I want this weekend to be fun, if everyone knows it'll just bring everyone down. Let's make it a memorable weekend."

I turned to my cousin who was looking at me, tears in her eyes.

"I love you, you know that right? We'll find a donor."

I looked away as I fumbled with the door handle.

"Yeah I know."

--- --- ---


	21. Chapter 21

--- --- ---

Title: Instant Messenger 21?

Author: Harmoni

Category: WWE

Rating: T for teen...cuz I like to swear hehehe

Summary: A nice messenger chat with WWE imposters becomes her way for escape. Cause that's all they were, Imposters. she wasn't that dense, she just wanted to pretend and play along cuz that's what they were doing.. Right?

Disclaimer: the OC's belong to me. wrestlers belong to the WWE and themselves, Part of the cheer is from Bring it On and the other part is from me… yes I admit it I used to be a cheerleader hides head in shame

Spoilers: Randy is suspended, and I'll prolly just make it up as I go along. I might follow some things that happen and discard the rest. My fan fic, my rules ha ha ha)

Feedback: Please tell me what you think

Author's Note: Ahem if this completely sucks, I'm blaming it on my feverish mind… I wrote this while sick. There is an explanation behind this story that I may perhaps share at a later date. I dreamed half of it but that's how a lot of my fics start...and before people go on about another Randy story…. SOOOO not my fault My Randy Muse is running rampant and SOOOO not my fault… please tell me what you honestly think it's written in 1st person which I usually don't do. And this is still unbetaed…. \

--- --- ---

I screamed as I was lifted into an FU by John.

"Let me down, you big loser." I screeched hitting his back.

"Aww Princess, you know you love it." John teased me.

"John, put her down." Danni snapped watching me closely.

John softly FU'd me onto the couch.

"You idiot." Danni snapped, "I said put her down, not FU her. You could've hurt her."

I rolled my eyes as John helped me off the couch looking between the two of us.

"What's going on?" He asked.

"Nothing." I quickly responded. "Danni's in a bad mood."

My cousin shrugged, rolling her eyes, as she tossed back her dark hair. "Whatever, where's Randy?"

We had just arrived at the arena. The guys were busy so we rented a car and drove ourselves. The backstage crew knew us now so had no problem directing us the guy's locker room. We had just entered when John snuck in behind us and lifted me into an FU.

"He's talking to creative." John distractedly replied, his eyes just on Danni now.

"I'm gonna go find him." I said, hugging John.

"What this for?" John asked.

I shrugged. "For being you."

Truth be told, I was feeling more affectionate since yesterday. After we left, my mom had gone back for the marrow test and it had turned out she was not compatible. It was hard to take in and again Danni was looking to cancel this trip but I wouldn't let her. I needed this. When we got back, Danni and her mom were going to try. After that, it would have to be an outside donor. Things weren't looking up for me but I wasn't going to let anything else ruin my weekend.

I moved over to Danni, giving her a hug "Play nice." I whispered. "Be normal, you promised."

She gave me an extra squeeze, almost like she wasn't going to let me go "I know, I'm trying."

"Try harder." I pleaded as I pulled away and went off down the hall.

It didn't take me long to find him as he was leaving an office.

"You're here." He replied, giving me a kiss and a hug. "How was your flight?"

"Painless." I replied my head against his chest. "But just to warn you Danni is in a bad mood. Perhaps we shouldn't leave poor John alone too long."

"What's up with her?"

"I don't know. Perhaps she's just tired and cranky."

"You okay?" he asked as I sighed in content

I nodded. "I'm just happy to be here, and tired."

"But not cranky?" He teased.

I stuck my tongue out at him. "Not yet but keep pushing me buddy."

The next thing I knew I was scooped up into his arms.

"Randy." I cried, "Put me down."

He grinned and shook his head as he walked back to his locker room. "Nah I think I like you like this." He leaned down and kissed me as my arms went around his neck.

"Get a room."

I broke away from the kiss to see Chris Masters smiling at us.

"Nice to see you too." I laughed. "How's it going?"

"Not too bad, good to see you again."

"Thanks you too."

"Awesome cheerleading segment you and your friends had. You gotta do that again sometime."

I laughed. "Thanks. I doubt we will but it was fun."

"I'll see you later. He called as he waved as continued on down the hall.

"So what's new?" Randy asked. "Anything interesting happen? You find a new job yet?"

My smile faded. "No, I'm not going back to work right now. 'sides if I did, I wouldn't be able to come see you."

He laughed. "In that case stay unemployed as long as possible."

"And mooch off you even longer?" I teased before becoming serious "I don't feel right taking your money."

He shrugged it off. "When it comes to paying your airfare or only being able to see you when I can come there I think I'd rather pay airfare. Trust me, Lana Withdrawals are no fun."

I threw my head back in laughter. "Lana withdrawals. No such thing Buddy boy."

"Ah but there is, I've experienced it. See you never have to go through it cause you're always with you. But to me, it's hell."

I gave him another kiss. "Aww my poor baby."

We jumped as his locker room door slammed open and Danni walked by, tears streaming down her face, her hands balled up and looking ready to kill someone. She stormed past us, not even acknowledging us as Randy and I stared at each other, dumbfounded.

"What was that about?" He asked.

I shrugged as he put me down and we went into the room. John was sitting there looking shocked and confused.

"What happened?" I asked.

"I don't know, we were talking about…stuff, she got all pissed off and stormed out."

He gave me a look that meant they had been talking about me but I couldn't tell if Danni had told him or not.

I sighed. "Let me go talk to her."

I left the room in the direction that she had gone but didn't get very far when an arm grabbed me and spun me around. I turned right into John.

"Following me?" I asked, an eyebrow raised, knowing exactly what he wanted.

He pulled me off to the side a bit and looked around, making sure no one else was nearby.

"What's going on?" He asked me.

I shakingly ran a hand through my hair. "What- what do you mean? What did Danni say?"

"It's not what she said, it's what she didn't say."

I looked away, unable to meet his eyes.

"We were in the room talkin'" He continued. "knew she was in a bad mood, so I brought up a topic that I thought was safe and make her happy. I told her how much healthier you were lookin' and she completely flipped at me before storming out of there. What's goin' on?"

"Nothing." I replied, still not meeting his eyes.

He grabbed my chin, forcing my eyes to meet his, which I reluctantly did.

We both didn't say anything as he stared searchingly into my eyes. He dropped his hand, shaking his head.

"No. No Princess. No."

I blinked rapidly, forcing the tears back. I gave a short nod, diverting my eyes.

"When?"

"I noticed the bruises a few weeks ago and went for tests last week. I got the results back yesterday." I replied in a low voice.

He turned away from me, one hand on his hip as he shook his head, running a hand over his face.

"That ain't fair." He muttered.

"I know." I quietly replied.

"When do ya start your treatments again?"

I sighed. "I don't."

He looked back at me, confused.

"The Doctors don't think chemo will help me anymore. My best bet is a Bone Marrow transplant."

"From who?"

"They hoped my mom. A parent or sibling is the best bet. I only have my mom and she's- she's not compatible. They tested her yesterday."

"What about Danni, or another family member?"

I shrugged. "They'll try but there's a higher risk of rejection. And if they're not compatible it'll be an outside donor with an even higher risk of rejection and a long waiting list."

I sighed brushing at my tears, saying what I had been thinking about since yesterday but had been unable to say it out loud. "I'm dying John."

He grabbed my shoulders, lightly shaking me as he looked hard into my eyes. "Don't say that. You're not dying."

I stared back at him, not acknowledging what he had just said. "Please don't tell-"

"Randy?" He finished for me. "Princess, that I can't do. You can't hide something like this."

"I know. And I don't plan on it. But please, let me have this weekend. This last weekend to be normal. He's coming to visit me in a couple weeks, I'll tell him everything then. But I need his weekend John."

He stared at me before hesitantly nodding. "I don't like this Princess."

"Please John. Please help me. Do this for me"

"I'll do it for you."

I threw my arms around him "Thanks John, you're the best, and I love you for that."

I kissed him on the cheek and that's when we heard a noise behind us. I turned to see Randy behind us, looking at both of us with disgust on his face before he turned and stomped away.

"Oh god." I whispered, suddenly feeling sick to my stomach and it wasn't from the cancer.

"You don't think…." John trailed off, looking to where Randy had left.

"I- I don't know how much he heard."

But I prayed he didn't hear it all. I didn't want him finding out this way.

--- --- ---


	22. Chapter 22

Am I becoming too damn predictable or something? Hmmmm…lol

Oh and tissue warning…

--- --- ---

Title: Instant Messenger 22?

Author: Harmoni

Category: WWE

Rating: T for teen...cuz I like to swear hehehe

Summary: A nice messenger chat with WWE imposters becomes her way for escape. Cause that's all they were, Imposters. she wasn't that dense, she just wanted to pretend and play along cuz that's what they were doing.. Right?

Disclaimer: the OC's belong to me. wrestlers belong to the WWE and themselves, Part of the cheer is from Bring it On and the other part is from me… yes I admit it I used to be a cheerleader hides head in shame

Spoilers: Randy is suspended, and I'll prolly just make it up as I go along. I might follow some things that happen and discard the rest. My fan fic, my rules ha ha ha)

Feedback: Please tell me what you think

Author's Note: Ahem if this completely sucks, I'm blaming it on my feverish mind… I wrote this while sick. There is an explanation behind this story that I may perhaps share at a later date. I dreamed half of it but that's how a lot of my fics start...and before people go on about another Randy story…. SOOOO not my fault My Randy Muse is running rampant and SOOOO not my fault… please tell me what you honestly think it's written in 1st person which I usually don't do. And this is still unbetaed…. \

--- --- ---

"Oh god." I whispered on the verge of a panic attack.

"Breathe." John reminded me, rubbing small circles on my back.

"I-I have to find him and talk to him."

John nodded in agreement "Why don't you look for him and I'll go talk to your cousin."

I nodded, going at a fast walk down the hallway.

"Whoa, Lana, what's going on?" Shawn Michaels asked.

"Have you seen Randy?"

He nodded. "He came by here not too long ago I think he was headed outside. You two okay?"

I helplessly shrugged, offering him a weak smile as I quickened my pace, practically running as I got to the door and pushed my way outside.

"Randy." I called as he paced in the parking lot.

He briefly glanced at me, looking more hurt then anything else. What exactly had he heard?

"Why-why did you take off?" I asked as I moved closer, trying to gouge what he knew.

"I heard enough." He spat out.

I stopped. "What did you hear?"

"You telling John you loved him."

"That's it?" I cautiously asked.

"What do you mean is that it?" he exploded. "Isn't that enough?"

I took a step back, caught unaware by this angry side of him. Yes I've seen him angry but never really with me.

"It's not what you think." I whispered.

"Right." He snorted.

"It's not. I was telling John I loved him for being a great guy, you know as a friend? I wouldn't do that to either you or Danni. John's a friend and only a friend. If you're implying what I think you are implying, that would be like going out with a brother and a big ew there."

He stopped, still turned away from me and I watched as his shoulders began to shake.

What was he doing? Was he actually crying?

I held my breath as I watched him, when he finally turned around I could see he was laughing.

"I'm an idiot."

I crossed my arms over my chest, raising an eyebrow as I bit back a laugh. "You want me to answer that?"

"No I can figure it out on my own."

I stuck my tongue out at him as he stepped forward and placed a kiss on my forehead. "I'm sorry Lans."

"Momentary lapse in sanity." I shrugged it off, with a smile, more relieved then anything else he had walked in on the end of the conversation.

--- --- ---

Monday night Raw was fun. Danni and John had worked out their differences obviously making it easier now that he knew what had been bugging her. Danni and I also got to pull out our DX uniforms for a couple backstage segments. One was right after DX had won and we were celebrating backstage with them before Vince McMahon showed up. The second one had Danni and me stopping to get a drink of water when Randy stalked up to us, remembering who we were. We stepped back in fear only to bump into another body, who just happened to be John Cena, leading to a confrontation between the two.

It was fun, a great end to a great weekend and I didn't want to leave knowing I would have to get back to real life and when Randy came to see me next week I would have to tell him. A great way to send him off on his tour down under but time was running out and as much as I didn't want to tell him, I had to. Mom, Danni and John were making sure of that. Thank god I hadn't told Jen and Krista the news yet, it would be two more people harassing me.

We left Wednesday and the whole week I was on edge wondering just how I was going to tell him and eagerly awaiting the results from Danni and her mom's test to see if either were compatible.

Tuesday came and I went to pick up Randy from the airport but I did so with a heavy heart. Dr. Cortez had called that morning and the news was not good. Neither were compatible and I was now put on a waiting list for a compatible donor. One that may never even appear. I could feel my life growing shorter. I felt like my days were numbered. There was no guarantee a donor would appear, my time was running out. I was dying.

And what bugged me most was knowing I would die and my worst fear would come true. I would leave behind people I cared for and I could not do that, My family I had no choice they were there for me now and always, they were all I had left but I'd be damned if I let any of my newer friends see me suffer and be there to pick up the pieces after I was gone. Especially Randy. I tried to bite back a panic attack at this. I was supposed to tell him, but I couldn't. I just couldn't. First I had been afraid of his pity, then I was afraid of his anger, but now I didn't care about either. I was afraid of what would happen. When I started feeling sicker, when I was too weak to do anything, what would he do? He had his whole career ahead of him. He had his whole life. I couldn't ruin that.

No, it had to end and it had to end this week.

"Hey sweetheart, you okay?" Randy asked as soon as he met up with me.

I smiled and nodded turning my head as he leaned in for a kiss and kissed my cheek.

"Cold sore." I lied, pointing to an invisible spot on my lip.

He nodded not pushing the issue as he grabbed his bag and grabbed my hand and I lead him out to the car, stopping occasionally so he could sign autographs. I was amazed that a couple people even recognized me as the DX cheerleader. But soon we made our way out of the airport and he teased me seeing as I was the one driving, alone. Normally I would've given him the keys but I laughed and slid in behind the wheel, determined to keep myself busy as I turned the car out of the lot and towards home.

"You're awfully quiet." He pointed out as he fiddled with the radio.

I shrugged, "Sorry, I'm a little tired, I didn't sleep much last night."

"Excited to see me?" He teased.

I forced a smile and nodded.

"I'm leaving Thursday morning as we have a tour in Australia." He reminded me. "So I have something planned for tomorrow night."

"Like what?" I asked, looking at him in surprise. "You don't have to do any of this for me."

"I know." He smiled, "But I want to."

I bit back a sigh and forced another smile. He wasn't going to make this easy on me.

--- --- ---

The next night, after a wonderful picnic lunch, Randy and I walked along the seawall, enjoying the sea air as we looked at the stars. All yesterday and today had been hard as I tried to figure out what to do and Randy knew something was bugging me. But each time he asked, I pasted a smile on and waved it off. He also asked me what was bothering my mom as she had seemed to have lost her bounce. I made some excuse up about her having a tough time at work.

"Lana." Randy said, tugging on my hand to turn me towards him.

I smiled up at him and he sighed.

"Something's been bugging you, why won't you talk about it?"

"Cause nothing is wrong." I replied once again shrugging it off as I turned to the ocean

I could feel him staring at me but I ignored him and he dropped the subject.

"I want to talk to you about something important."

I turned back to him, my head cocked to the side as I stared at him curiously. "Is something wrong with you?" I asked.

"No, everything is great, thanks to you. But I just- there's something I need to tell you."

I stepped back and stared at him suspiciously. Oh god don't tell me he was going to say what I think he was. No he couldn't do this. Not now, not when I was just getting the courage up to do what I had to.

"Lana, the last little while with you has been amazing. You've changed me into a better person and for that I'm grateful. I just- I want to tell you-"

"Please don't say it." I whispered.

"Lana, I love you."

"No. Randy no."

He looked at me surprised, I guess not expecting this reaction.

"Lana, what's wrong."

"Take it back." I said.

"Why? Is that why you've been acting weird, were you planning on breaking up with me, or something?"

"You promised not to fall in love with me." I whispered, my lower lip trembling.

"That was before, I couldn't stop this." He snapped.

Tears fell from my eyes but I ignored them. "Well stop it now, you can't love me Randy, you weren't supposed to fall in love with me."

"I can't turn it off Lana, it's not that simple."

"Well make it simple. Please, just stop. Don't love me, better yet don't even like me. It's over Randy, we're over."

He grabbed my arm. "How can you say that? Can you honestly tell me you don't feel the same?"

"I don't." I moaned.

"And do we really have to go through this again? I thought we got past this."

"please, just stop, just leave me alone."

"No." He said. "What's going on Lana?"

I yanked my arm away from him. "You can't love me Randy, you can't."

"Why?"

"Because- because I'm dying. I have Leukemia and I'm dying, so you can't love me."

Ignoring the tears and the look on his face, I ran away as fast I could.

I wanted to run away from it all, but unfortunately it's never that easy.

--- --- ---


	23. Chapter 23

OK just so you all know, i am reading and I thank you all for the reviews, i usually write back to everyone i'm just having some time issues write now and am working on some original fiction so just know i thank you all SO SO much for your kind words and i wouldn't be writing if not for all ur reviews so keep it up

--- --- ---

Title: Instant Messenger 23?

Author: Harmoni

Category: WWE

Rating: T for teen...cuz I like to swear hehehe

Summary: A nice messenger chat with WWE imposters becomes her way for escape. Cause that's all they were, Imposters. she wasn't that dense, she just wanted to pretend and play along cuz that's what they were doing.. Right?

Disclaimer: the OC's belong to me. wrestlers belong to the WWE and themselves, Part of the cheer is from Bring it On and the other part is from me… yes I admit it I used to be a cheerleader hides head in shame

Spoilers: Randy is suspended, and I'll prolly just make it up as I go along. I might follow some things that happen and discard the rest. My fan fic, my rules ha ha ha)

Feedback: Please tell me what you think

Author's Note: Ahem if this completely sucks, I'm blaming it on my feverish mind… I wrote this while sick. There is an explanation behind this story that I may perhaps share at a later date. I dreamed half of it but that's how a lot of my fics start...and before people go on about another Randy story…. SOOOO not my fault My Randy Muse is running rampant and SOOOO not my fault… please tell me what you honestly think it's written in 1st person which I usually don't do.

--- --- ---

**Lana: I told him.**

**Jen: And?**

**Lana: I haven't heard from him since. There's more, there's something I haven't told you guys yet. Something he found out.**

**Krista: What's wrong?**

**Lana: It's back. It came back and I can't be saved unless I find a compatible donor. Randy told me he loved me and I freaked, told him I couldn't, told him what was wrong with me and ran away. I haven't heard from him since.**

**Krista: It's back?**

**Lana: yes.**

**Jen: And how long ago did you tell him?**

**Lana: Just before the Aussie tour last week.**

**Jen: I'm so sorry girl. Sorry it's back and sorry he's an asshole.**

**Krista: I was really routing for you 2.**

**Lana: So was I. I made him promise so long ago not to fall in love with me. I was so scared something like this would happen. And now…**

**Jen: you fell in love with him too.**

**Lana: look girls I just wanted to come on and give you an update. I'm not feeling too well so will talk to you when I can.**

I quickly signed off, lying on my bed and staring at the ceiling. I was all cried out. I had no more tears.

When I had left him in the park, I took a taxi home, and locked myself in my room and yes, bawled my eyes out. Hmm I'm coming off as a big cry baby aren't I? I don't care. I didn't want to tell him like that. Actually I didn't want to tell him at all. I wanted to end it so I didn't have to hurt him more. But then he said those 3 words. I Love you. I didn't want him to fall in love with me. I didn't want him to make it harder. But he did and it came out because I freaked and now he hated me.

Look how quickly he left. Hell his stuff was even here. He must've gone straight to the airport just to get as far away as possible from me.

I haven't told Danni yet, I knew she was busy with a college course for work and had barely talked to her in the last couple weeks. John called me the first day of the Aussie tour and he knew right away by Randy's hostile attitude that he knew and called me. Through the tears and the sniffling I had been able to tell him everything. He had called me everyday since then.

My phone rang and even though I knew who it was, I waited for my mom to pick it up but soon I realized she wasn't there. Groaning I reached over and picked up the portable phone.

"Hello?" I croaked out.

"_Damn you sound awful."_

"Thank you Captain Obvious. What do you want John?"

"_You Okay Princess?"_

I made a noise unable to trust my voice.

"_I'm guessin' ya haven't told Danni yet huh? I didn't say anythin' when I talked to her earlier."_

"no." I whispered. "I haven't been able to yet. I don't wanna distract her even more from her work. She's almost done so I'll tell her then."

"_I tried talkin' to him today."_

"Why?" I asked him. "can't you just leave it alone?"

"_Damn well should have. I think he's hurt Princess. He's hurt ya didn't tell him and pissed off he can't fix it."_

"Pissed off? I doubt he could care less."

"_He's confused." _

"Did he tell you all this?"

"_Naw, not exactly. We kinda got into a fight before Raw."_

"John." I said my voice tired and weak.

"_I didn't mean for it to happen. I talk to you everyday Princess and I know you're hurtin'. I hate to hear you like this so I decided to talk to him today."_

I sighed but waited for him to continue.

"_Probably wasn't the best idea. When he realized I knew already and kept it from him, he freaked out and punched me. I got me a nice black eye. Pissed me off so I hit him back, H and Shawn broke us up."_

"What did he say?"

John sighed.

"John, what did he say?" I pressed.

"_He called us all liars, asked how we could keep this from him then yelled at the rest of the locker room wonderin' who else knew, if you had told everyone but him. He got into Master's face, H's, Shawn's, anyone you had contact with and asked if they knew too. I grabbed him and pulled him away, he pushed me off called me a fuckin' traitor and punched me."_

I clenched the phone tighter, and gritted my teeth. "I'm sorry John, I didn't mean for you to get hurt. I didn't mean for any of this to happen."

"_It ain't your fault."_

"Or so you say. I'll talk to you later okay?"

I hung up the phone and immediately pressed the talk button again, blocking my number before I dialed another number.

"_Hello?"_

"You listen here." I hissed into the phone. "Hate me all you want, despise me all you want but don't you dare, don't you _dare_ blame this on anyone else. They kept quiet on _my_ commands. I begged them not to tell you so if you want to place the blame on anyone, place it on me."

"_Lana, I-" _I heard him sigh and I don't know why but I hesitated and waited for him to finish.

"_Forget it."_ He muttered before hanging up.

Out of frustration, I screamed and threw the phone against the wall. Pissed off with the world and what it had done to me.

--- --- ---

"Just give me the fucking phone." Danni snarled, reaching for my house phone.

She had come over after her course was complete and I told her everything that had happened since that horrible night.

"Leave it alone, Danni." I sighed, gently pushing her back. "What happened, happened. I dealt with it so let it go."

"And you're fine with him being the world's biggest asshole."

"I don't care." I murmured, my head falling back on the couch. "I told you I was going to end it anyways."

"Then he told you he loved you. Lana, can you seriously tell me you don't feel the same way?"

"Why does everyone keep asking me that?" I asked annoyed.

"Because nobody is stupid. It's not hard to see. You're the only one who refuses to see that."

"I don't." I muttered.

Danni rolled her eyes. "look at me and tell me that."

I lifted my eyes to hers. "I don't." I said again,

"god, you don't think I know when you're lying? I of all people am not stupid and know you better then anyone else so don't lie to me."

"What does it matter? He's made it pretty clear how he feels. What does it matter how I feel?"

"Because I'm sick and tired of you walking around like nothing bothers you and you don't feel anything towards anyone."

"It's easier." I shrugged.

"You always say that but you're not making it easier on anyone, least of all yourself."

"Why are you yelling at me? I thought you wanted to call Randy and yell at him."

"Well you won't let me call him and you're here being all dumb again so you put the pieces together."

"Wow so you go from over protective mode, hovering over me and making sure everything is okay, to yell and pick on Lana mode, trying to make me as miserable as possible."

"Me?" She asked with a disbelieving laugh. "oh no, I think you're making yourself miserable all by yourself."

"Me? How am I making myself more miserable." I yelled at her. "I'm the one dealing with it/ I'm the one getting over it so why don't you do the same and drop it?"

"Because this never would happened if you just told him from the get go."

"And none of this would have happened if you two weren't scheming behind my back."

"Oh so the whole time you've been with him you hated it and wished it never happened huh?"

I heavily dropped down to the couch, my head in my hands. "No, I'm glad it happened but if I had told him sooner this all would have happened sooner."

"Probably not." She quietly replied sitting down beside me. "More then likely he's just hurt and confused and he will talk to you again soon. Don't forget Lan you didn't just tell him you had cancer, you had to tell him that you've had it before and it came back, that was probably a great blow to him."

"When did you become the voice of reason?" I muttered wiping at the tears falling down.

"Probably about the time you quit being the voice of reason." She teases. "One of us has to be."

I sighed, rubbing my eyes hard as the phone rang. Reaching over I picked it up from the table, thinking it was John.

"Hello?"

"_Hello this is Dr. Cortez's office calling, may I speak with Lana Mitchell please?"_

I gripped the phone harder, my eyes shooting up to meet Danni's.

"This is Lana." I replied, hope now hovering in my heart. Was it possible? Did they already find a donor?

I listened for a few moments in silence then surprise and shock before hanging up the phone.

"what did they say?" Danni asked, "Did they already find a donor?"

"No." I shook my head slowly. "They called to tell me that the latest person to be tested for bone marrow compatibility came back negative."

"What?" Danni asked in confusion. "Who went in? No one knows. Was it John?"

I shook my head, still thinking I got the name wrong.

"Who?" Danni asked, before she gasped, covering a hand with her mouth. "no, really?"

I nodded my head. "It was Randy."

--- --- ---


	24. Chapter 24

Me thinks we are gettnig closer... usually i have the ending of the fic beofre i start writing but i'm torn i really am.. i ahve 2 ways this could go, adn with one way there is a possible sequel... what do people think of that?

Actually i changed my mind... i ain't ending this thign til i ahve 1000 reviews.. okay j/k, now i'm getting greedy

--- --- ---

Title: Instant Messenger 24?

Author: Harmoni

Category: WWE

Rating: T for teen...cuz I like to swear hehehe

Summary: A nice messenger chat with WWE imposters becomes her way for escape. Cause that's all they were, Imposters. she wasn't that dense, she just wanted to pretend and play along cuz that's what they were doing.. Right?

Disclaimer: the OC's belong to me. wrestlers belong to the WWE and themselves, Part of the cheer is from Bring it On and the other part is from me… yes I admit it I used to be a cheerleader hides head in shame

Spoilers: Randy is suspended, and I'll prolly just make it up as I go along. I might follow some things that happen and discard the rest. My fan fic, my rules ha ha ha)

Feedback: Please tell me what you think

Author's Note: Ahem if this completely sucks, I'm blaming it on my feverish mind… I wrote this while sick. There is an explanation behind this story that I may perhaps share at a later date. I dreamed half of it but that's how a lot of my fics start...and before people go on about another Randy story…. SOOOO not my fault My Randy Muse is running rampant and SOOOO not my fault… please tell me what you honestly think it's written in 1st person which I usually don't do. And this is still unbetaed….

--- --- ---

--- --- ---

**Lana: I don't know why you did it or why you still care but thank you for going. The test came back negative and you're not compatible but it still means a lot that you did that.**

I hit send but seeing he wasn't online, didn't expect a reply back. It had taken me days to get up the nerve to even write that. Maybe I should've called him but I couldn't work up the nerve. Yelling at him was a lot easier then calling him and thanking him especially when he would more then likely hang up on me again. I was shocked when he signed on and a reply came back. I guess he had been hiding again.

**Randy: I'm sorry I wasn't compatible and yes I do still care. Were you not listening that night? I love you Lana.**

**Lana: How could you still love me now that you know?**

**Randy: I've told you before, it's not something you can turn off just like that. No matter what I still love you. I'm pissed off and hurt you didn't tell me about this. Did everyone know but me?**

**Lana: No. Jen, Krista, my mom, Danni and John know.**

**Randy: Why John?**

**Lana: It was an accident. That first show I came to see you I was wearing his hat and when he pulled it off he took my wig with him.**

**Randy: That was a wig?**

**Lana: Yes, I never cut my hair, it had grown out after the chemo, I begged everyone not to tell you so please don't be mad at them, I kept putting it off and telling them I would tell you. They all kept telling me to tell you so you can't be mad at them.**

**Randy: I'm not. Were you really going to tell me that night? Or did it just slip.**

**Lana: Actually the night we kissed I was going to tell you then I chickened out. I was going to break up with you the night you told me you loved me.**

**Randy: What? Why?**

**Lana: Because I was scared. I had cancer the first time I talked to you online, I was sick with Chemo when I disappeared all the time. When I met you, I had JUST gone into remission. But then the test results came back the day before I came to see you last time and that's when they told me it was back with a vengeance and chemo won't help this time. I found out mom wasn't compatible then the day you came here I found out Danni and her mom weren't compatible. Now I'm put on a super long waiting list waiting for something that may never happen. I freaked and was scared. I'm sorry.**

**Randy: Do you still want this ended?**

**Lana: you shouldn't have to go through this, it's not fair.**

**Randy: You shouldn't have to either**

**Lana: But you have a choice.**

**Randy: And what if I choose to stay with you to be in it for the long run.**

**Lana: Then I'd say you don't know what you're saying. I'm dying Randy.**

**Randy: No you're not, we'll find you a compatible donor.**

**Lana: The waiting list is long. We've tried all my relatives.**

**Randy: Your dad?**

**Lana: Is in Mexico somewhere. No one knows where to find him. He doesn't care.**

**Randy: Then we'll find someone. You're not gonna die on me.**

**Lana: it's not that simple. You can't choose if I live or die.**

**Randy: But I can help. I'm sorry I didn't come talk to you after you told me. I freaked. Lana I love you, nothing will change that.**

**Lana: I don't blame you. But how did you know? That I needed a donor?**

**Randy: John told me after our whole little fight, then I called your mom for the info to get tested.**

**Lana: Seriously Randy you can back out now, no hard feelings. This isn't going to be easy. I'm going for Chemo, I'm gonna be sick, I'll probably be stuck at the hospital now. I'll lose my hair, I'll be ugly again, you'll see the ugly scar on my chest where they administer the chemo. I'll become weaker and sicker and I'm on a waiting list. If someone is found, there will be surgery and then for the rest of my life there will be a risk of me rejecting the marrow. If no one is found, I'll soon die. You shouldn't have to deal with that.**

**Randy: You just told me I can't choose if you live or die but when are you going to learn you can't rule everyone's life? You have to let them make their own decisions. I'm not going anywhere.**

**Lana: stubborn ass**

**Randy: hard headed mule. I'll come see you soon. You're not getting rid of me.**

**Lana: And if I refuse to see you?**

**Randy: You won't.**

**Lana: So sure of yourself?**

**Randy: Yes, you may not admit it but you're falling for me Lana Mitchell. I'll ttyl.**

He signed off but he was right.

Damn him, he was right.

--- --- ---

So where do we go from here? I couldn't tell you. What I want to say is this is where my story ends. I want to say Randy was by my side to the end. He was there that day the doctor came in and told me she found me a donor. He was there the day I had the transplant, holding my hand before I was put under and there when I woke up. I want to say that I never had a problem with rejection that I was forever done with it.

But I can't say that.

I don't know what the future holds. If any of that will actually happen, or even if I will be here to see my future.

I woke up this morning feeling awful. I had no energy and was feeling dizzy and nauseous. I tried pushing it down though.

I'm waiting for Danni and John to pick me up. He's in town to come see her, finally and they said that we would all go do something before I start my chemo next week. I wish Randy was here but he's busy this week with appearances and some match he's doing in OVW. He said he would come see me as soon as he had some free time. We started talking on the phone and I guess you could say I gave in to the fact that he wasn't going anywhere. And though I wouldn't say anything out loud it made me all happy and it gave me hope. But I wanted to wait to see just how far he would go.

Despite feeling sick, I wanted to go out today. God only knows when the next time would be so I forced myself to get up and change.

They came by an hour later and I hopped into the back.

"How are you feelin'?" John asked.

"Peachy, with a side of keen." I muttered.

"Are you sure?" Danni asked, turning around and looking at me closely. She could probably see how pale I was.

I nodded, changing the subject.

"How come he gets to drive your car and I don't?"

Danni smirked. "Ask his male ego. He has it in his mind that the guy should be driving. 'Sides, you'd probably drive my car off the road."

"Not fair I was sick that…." I trailed off not wanting to finish the sentence. I was sick when I drove off the road but I was sick again too.

"Hey Princess." John called, looking at me through the rear view mirror. When she's not lookin' I'll let you slip up front here."

I grinned mischievously. "Why John, I didn't know you thought of me that way."

He gave me the middle finger and my grin grew wider.

"Don't make promises you don't intend to keep."

I heard Danni's snicker as she refused to come to his defense.

"Damn women." John muttered, realizing he was alone.

"Where are we going?" I asked.

"Castle Fun Park." Danni said.

I smiled fondly. "That's where I brought Randy."

We arrived there shortly, after John took a few wrong turns, refusing to listen to our directions, and started off in the batting cages, watching each other hit. I laughed at both, easily out hitting them, even with my not feeling well. Danni had always sucked at softball and John was determined to go at the fastest speed. It was very comical though watching him get frustrated.

After, we went mini-golfing, both Danni and I constantly distracting John whenever he shot, annoying him to no end because he kept missing shot after shot.

We were at the 12th hole and it was my shot. Danni had run off to the washroom and John was unsuccessfully trying to distract me but Danni and I had been doing it to each other for years and were now immune to it. I hit the ball and it went through the little maze thing, going down the proper chute and coming out at the end, landing perfectly in the hole.

"Woo-hoo." I cried, raising my fist in the air. "Who rocks? Who's number 1?"

"Yeah, yeah rub it in, Princess." John grumbled, turning to put his ball down.

I continued celebrating as he lined up his shot, muttering about us being the world's biggest cheaters.

I stopped celebrating, gasping as pain went through me and I began feeling dizzy. John stopped in mid swing, noticing that for once I was quiet and he turned around.

"Princess?"

I looked up at him shakily as he stepped towards me.

"What's wrong?"

I tried to speak but no words came out as I collapsed.

"Lana." He yelled, catching me as I fell forward and scooping me up into his arms.

"What's going on?"

"Ambulance." I gasped, "call mom…Randy"

Then everything went black.

--- --- ---


	25. Chapter 25

My beta said issue warning...

Also i wanna pologise for not getting back to everyone for the lovely reviews, in all honesty it's been a shitty time so i;m behind, but thanks and i appreciate all your kindness

So I have many yays for the sequel, I just wanted to make sure I'd have readers.. as for it happening, I don't know yet.. I have othe projects I'm working on… so we'll see…but thank you…

--- --- ---

Title: Instant Messenger 25?

Author: Harmoni

Category: WWE

Rating: T for teen...cuz I like to swear hehehe

Summary: A nice messenger chat with WWE imposters becomes her way for escape. Cause that's all they were, Imposters. she wasn't that dense, she just wanted to pretend and play along cuz that's what they were doing.. Right?

Disclaimer: the OC's belong to me. wrestlers belong to the WWE and themselves, Part of the cheer is from Bring it On and the other part is from me… yes I admit it I used to be a cheerleader hides head in shame

Spoilers: Randy is suspended, and I'll prolly just make it up as I go along. I might follow some things that happen and discard the rest. My fan fic, my rules ha ha ha)

Feedback: Please tell me what you think

Author's Note: Ahem if this completely sucks, I'm blaming it on my feverish mind… I wrote this while sick. There is an explanation behind this story that I may perhaps share at a later date. I dreamed half of it but that's how a lot of my fics start...and before people go on about another Randy story…. SOOOO not my fault My Randy Muse is running rampant and SOOOO not my fault… please tell me what you honestly think it's written in 1st person which I usually don't do. And this is still unbetaed….

--- --- ---

I woke up feeling fine. I didn't feel sick or nauseous or weak or anything. I felt completely fine, like I wasn't even sick.

Opening my eyes, I sat up with no problem and looked around confused. I thought I was supposed to go to the hospital but I was in my room. And it was empty. Had that been a dream? It wouldn't have been the first time.

I got out of bed, noticing I was wearing the clothes I had supposedly gone to Castle Fun Park in. Had I just fainted then and they had brought me home? Last time Danni was with me so where was she now?

I stepped out of my room and went towards the living room, pausing briefly at what appeared to be crying noises. It tugged at my heart. I know my mother was having a tough time with this. Maybe more so then me; but as I listened she wasn't the only one who was crying.

"I should've come sooner." A male voice, Randy, said.

"It wouldn't have made a difference." Another male, this one John, replied. "It happened too fast."

"So? I should've been with her all the time. I never should have let so much time go by when I found out. We could've had this time together. This isn't fair."

I grew puzzled. What was the big deal? I was okay, just another fainting spell. I stepped into the living room waiting for them to acknowledge me, but no one did.

"Life isn't fair." Danni said in a low voice. She looked up and looked right at me, but it seemed she didn't see me.

"Guys, I'm fine now, what's the big sob fest for? Did someone die?"

But they ignored me and Danni continued talking.

"She always said that. But she still made the best of it; even if she was trying to control our lives."

"Hey, I resent that. I was trying to protect you."

"She was tryin' to protect you, protect us all." John softly said. "Think about why she didn't tell Randy, or even wanna tell me."

I stepped closer. This wasn't right, what the hell was going on?

"Mom?" I softly called.

Everyone ignored me.

I stepped in front of Randy, kneeling down in front of him.

"Randy?" I softly called, waving my hands in front of him.

When I still wasn't acknowledged, I stood up wildly looking around as I turned in circles. But when I stopped, the rest of the world didn't. It kept spinning out of control, and I closed my eyes, waiting a long time before I opened my eyes, startled to see I was outside, in what looked like a cemetery.

I turned around, and without thinking, moved towards the crowd of people off to my left. I slowed down realizing it was all people I know. People I had worked with. Others I hadn't seen in a long time. Danni, Auntie Kay, my mom, Krista, Jen Randy, John, and some other members of the WWE roster.

"No." I whispered, stepping around everyone, noticing once again that no one seemed to know I existed. But then I saw why. It was because I didn't exist. Not anymore.

My fears had come true.

_Lana May Mitchell_

_May 8, 1984-2006_

_Beloved daughter, beloved friend_

_Always in our hearts._

"No." I moaned, sinking to the still wet earth. "This isn't happening."

I watched as my mom, Danni, Auntie Kay, Randy, John and a few others walked by and laid a rose on the coffin, waiting to be put into the ground.

Tears trailed down my cheek as I stared at the coffin.

"Lana?"

I continued to cry not realizing someone was actually calling me.

"Lana, why are you crying?"

"I don't want to die." I sobbed, not looking up

"Then don't baby, it's time to wake up."

"How?" I moaned.

"Open your eyes."

"What?"

"You got to wake up sweetheart."

I opened my eyes, quickly closing them again as the harsh light broke through.

"Wh-" I couldn't finish because my mouth was so dry, immediately a hand was behind my head, helping me sit up as a glass of water was put to my lips. When I had a sip I opened my eyes again to see Randy there, looking as though he hadn't slept in days.

"What are you doing here?" I croaked out.

"John called me so I talked to Vince and with the help of Hunter, got the time off."

"For how long?"

"All house shows for the next little while. I have to go to Raw though if I'm needed, I actually just got back from it."

I looked at him confused. I had gone out with John and Danni on Thursday. Did I really sleep though the past few days?

"Why?"

He looked behind him and so did I. I saw my mother there, looking red eyed as if she had been crying since I had fainted.

"Mommy?" I whispered.

She sobbed and stepped forward to hug me, for some odd reason I felt like I should be the one comforting her so I did.

"Momma, it's okay. I'm going to be okay."

I felt her tense and she pulled away a forced smile now on her features.

"Of course you are baby."

"What happened?"

"You passed out." Randy stated matter of factly.

"But…why?"

They never got to answer as the door opened and a nurse came in followed by Danni, who came over and grasped my hand as the nurse checked my vitals.

"Good to see you awake, Lana, you gave us all quite a scare." The nurse said, filling out my chart. "We had your doctor paged and she should be here shortly."

"Where's John?" I asked after the nurse left.

Randy and Danni exchanged a look and I grew tired with the lack of answers.

"Can you tell me anything? Why is it so hard telling me where he is?"

"He wanted me to apologize for him." Randy hesitantly replied, "but we both couldn't get the time off. He had appearances to do."

"And was that so hard to say?" I asked with a frown.

He gave a small smile as he shook his head.

"How long have I been out for?" I asked, still confused about everything.

"5 days." Danni whispered.

I frowned. "When can I go home?"

Again the looks were exchanged, and I blew out a frustrated sigh.

"What the hell is going on?" I asked, thoroughly annoyed.

"Let's just wait for the doctor to come in." My mom soothed as she brushed my hair back.

I scowled and leaned back against my pillow but then I realized why they were being so evasive. Something was going on.

"Oh my god, something's wrong with me, isn't it?"

Randy grabbed my hand and I could see his eyes growing watery which pretty much confirmed what I had been thinking.

I lifted his chin and forced him to look at me.

"Your silence is very reassuring." I whispered. "It's stronger then ever isn't it?"

"I-I don't know for sure."

I sighed, and leaned back, closing my eyes. "Yes you do, you all know, and I'm going to know soon too. I don't see the point in stepping around it."

"Right to the point, like always, aren't you Lana?"

I opened my eyes and stared into the sympathetic eyes of my doctor, Dr. Cortez.

"Finally some answers." I huffed. "It's like pulling teeth."

She chuckled. "I'm sorry Lana, they were smart to wait for me. We don't want to give you any wrong information and cause unnecessary stress."

"And the silence is doing wonders for me." I sarcastically replied.

"Let's get right to it then." She said, pulling a chair up to my bed as she decided to also check my vitals. "Would you like them to remain?"

I nodded, grabbing Randy's hand.

"Basically your leukemia is attacking at a much faster pace then any of us expected. We are starting you on the Chemo tomorrow, hoping to at least slow it down. But it is taking over your body and I bumped you up on the waiting list for a marrow transplant. You are now high priority."

I squeezed Randy's hand. Being moved up was on one hand good. But that just showed how much more fatal this all was.

"How long will it take?" I asked.

"I can't predict it. We could find a compatible donor as soon as tomorrow or it could take awhile."

I brushed away the tears, refusing to let them take me over.

"How long do I have?"

Now Dr. Cortez sighed and I looked up at her, willing her to give me the news.

"Again, I can't predict that."

"Estimate, I know you have an idea."

"It all depends on how well the Chemo helps. You can have anywhere from 1-4 months."

My blood ran cold as my head dropped to my chest.

I could be dead by this time next month, and if not, anywhere in the next 4 months if a donor wasn't found.

Now this wasn't just a possibility I could be dying.

I really was dying.


	26. Chapter 26

Another tissue warning cuz I'm BAD…BBBBBBBAAAAAAADDDDDD and also a sheep on the side…LMAO.. don't ask, I'm just Psycho….

--- --- ---

Title: Instant Messenger 26?

Author: Harmoni

Category: WWE

Rating: T for teen...cuz I like to swear hehehe

Summary: A nice messenger chat with WWE imposters becomes her way for escape. Cause that's all they were, Imposters. she wasn't that dense, she just wanted to pretend and play along cuz that's what they were doing.. Right?

Disclaimer: the OC's belong to me. wrestlers belong to the WWE and themselves, Part of the cheer is from Bring it On and the other part is from me… yes I admit it I used to be a cheerleader hides head in shame

Spoilers: Randy is suspended, and I'll prolly just make it up as I go along. I might follow some things that happen and discard the rest. My fan fic, my rules ha ha ha)

Feedback: Please tell me what you think

Author's Note: Ahem if this completely sucks, I'm blaming it on my feverish mind… I wrote this while sick. There is an explanation behind this story that I may perhaps share at a later date. I dreamed half of it but that's how a lot of my fics start...and before people go on about another Randy story…. SOOOO not my fault My Randy Muse is running rampant and SOOOO not my fault… please tell me what you honestly think it's written in 1st person which I usually don't do. And this is still unbetaed…. \

--- --- ---

Days passed. I was started on the chemo treatments and with each passing day, I grew more and more sick.

Randy was there by my side all the time although I urged him to go back to work or at least go home for awhile but he refused. My mom and Danni were always there when they weren't working. I flat out refused their company when they said they would take the time off. Randy would be there they had nothing to worry about, if something happened, he would call them.

I enjoyed my time with Randy, although we didn't do much, I was usually too sick but often we would watch TV together and he would just hold my hand. Sometimes he would read to me and often it would end with me in tears. Tears that I couldn't even get up the energy to even read myself. Other times, he would just hold me. I knew this was harder on him then it was on me. He was just watching me waste away, unable to help, but I relished the times he held me. I felt whole, like I was well and there was no other people in the world but me and him.

A few days later, Jen and Krista showed up and this began a fresh round of tears. Just as quickly they were whisked away to be tested for Bone Marrow Compatibility. When the results came back, they were both negative. That didn't surprise me but the gesture was still sweet and I was grateful to them.

They stayed with us for a week but soon had to return home, promising to be back here as soon as possible. Their leaving felt like an end of sorts. Chances were I would never see them again.

I was in the hospital for 2 weeks. Randy had yet to leave as he hadn't been needed on Raw, Danni and Mom I could see were being run ragged in between work, home and the hospital. A few WWE superstars had even shown up on their days off. Ashley came with Matt. Trish came with Torrie and Chris Masters and they were all tested, which all turned out negative, but there was still no sign of John. Whenever I asked Randy about it, he always apologized and said John promised to come see me as soon as possible.

But I didn't have much longer.

My time was running out and he might not make it.

The Chemo wasn't working. I could feel it wasn't working and every time Dr. Cortez was in here checking me out she didn't appear too happy.

The end was almost near but there were a few more things I had to do.

--- --- ---

"Momma?" I whispered.

She looked up from the book she was reading, happy to see I was awake. It was only her and I in the room.

"Yes Princess?"

"I- I don't have much longer, I can feel it inside and before you deny it or tell me not to talk that way, please hear me out. I want you to tell Randy to get John here. I want to see him one last time."

I paused, mustering up as much energy as I could before I continue.

"When I'm gone, I want you to look out for John and Randy and Danni. Don't let them mourn for me too long, and you don't do the same either. I'll be waiting for you Mommy and I won't be in pain anymore, you won't have to see me like this anymore. And please make sure Randy knows I love him. He's the best thing that's happened to me."

The tears welled in her eyes and I rapidly blinked back the ones forming in mine.

"I love you all so very much but I don't have much time and I don't want to stay here anymore. I want to go home. If I'm going to die, I want to die at home, surrounded by the ones I love, at peace."

My mother sighed, running a hand over my once again hairless head. It didn't bother me as much this time and I didn't even care that Randy saw me like this.

"Baby, I wish I could. There's just no way I could afford that."

"Perhaps I can help." Randy said, entering the room, his eyes red from crying. "I'll get you home Lana."

--- --- ---

"Tonight and tonight only I'm gonna say screw storylines. Tonight isn't about some belt or some stupid rivalries. Tonight is about getting someone home."

My eyes filled with tears as I watched Raw on TV the next week and Randy was out in the ring looking like he hadn't slept since he left my hospital room.

"I want you all to look at this picture."

A picture of me was shown in my DX cheerleading outfit, a big smile pasted on my face.

"You may recognize her as a DX cheerleader, or some may have seen her with me outside of shows, but this is Lana Mitchell. And Lana has one wish and that's to go home. She's in the hospital right now and she's dying."

Same old Randy, sugarcoating everything.

"She has Leukemia and has anywhere from a couple weeks to 3 months to live. She needs a Bone Marrow transplant but as of yet been unable to find a donor. Tonight, 25 cents from each ticket sold will be used to help get Lana home where she can be at peace and enjoy what time she has. Also there are many donation bins set up around the arena exits to help out as well. Please help Lana get home. But most importantly, have yourself tested for Bone Marrow Compatibility. If not for Lana, do it for someone else who may need it. So someone else doesn't have to go through what Lana is. What her whole family is going through. No one deserves that."

He dropped the mic. No music played as he rolled out of the ring and walked up the ramp. He stopped at the top and turned around, looking directly into the camera.

"I love you Lana Mitchell"

In my hospital room I began to sob.

"I love you too Randy Orton."

--- --- ---

I was sleeping, something I did a lot, when I was woken up by someone grasping my hand. Yawning, I slowly opened my eyes as a kiss was pressed to my forehead.

"How you doing Sweetheart?"

"Mmm? You were great on Raw."

"am I not great every week?"

I gave him a small smile. "And so modest. Yeah, but you were extra great. You should become face again. I liked it when you were a cocky face."

He smiled back. "I will one day."

I slowly lifted my hand to caress his cheek. "I wish I could see it." I softly said.

He looked away, unable to meet my eyes.

"Where did all these cards and flowers come from?" He asked, changing the subject.

"They started arriving this morning. From people I've never heard of. People who watched you. Mom read some of the cards. Some people are going to get tested to help out anyone who needs it."

"That's great. Perhaps we'll luck out."

"I saw you, on top of the ramp. I saw you say you love me."

"I do." He whispered.

I motioned him closer, pressing a soft kiss to his lips. "I love you too."

"I'll love you always."

"But don't love me only. I would never have survived this long if not for you but when I'm gone, you have to live."

His eyes filled with tears as he kissed the back of my hand.

"Promise me." I whispered.

He shook his head clearing his throat "I can't and please don't make me promise that."

"I won't. But one day you will and when you do, don't feel guilty."

"I hate you talking this way, there's still a chance."

I just smiled and closed my eyes. "I love you."

I felt his lips gently over mine.

"I love you too Lana."

--- --- ---

"Hey Princes."

I rubbed at my eyes before opening them up, my tiredness soon forgotten as I saw who was there.

"John?"

How ya doin'?"

I scowled at him and called my cousin over.

"Danni, stand in front of him."

She looked at me confused but listened anyway.

"Now kick him."

Together the two of them laugh and she gave him a light tap on the shin.

"What took you so long?"

He placed a kiss on my forehead. "sorry princess, I was on official Randy business."

I looked between Randy and John confused. "He told me you were busy with appearances."

"I know, I told him to say that, I had something important to do."

"What was it?"

"I had to go to Mexico."

I stared at him, confused by why he would go down there. I never got to ask him why as my mom came bursting in the door.

"Baby, we have some good news." She beamed. "The doctor says you can go home."

I looked at her, then at Randy. "Enough money was raised?"

"Yes and depending how long you need it, John and I will cover the rest."

My face fell as I shook my head. "No, I can't ask you guys to do that."

"Why not?" John asked. "It's our money, we can do what we want, and suddenly spending it on clothes or cars, well, it just ain't important anymore."

My eyes welled up as I shook my head. "Why? Why are you guys doing this for me? I'm just some girl you met on the internet."

"But you've made an impression that will last forever." Randy quietly said.

"Are you ready to go home Lan?" my cousin asked.

I nodded. "Yes, take me home."

--- --- ---

We're almost at the end…. I'm so sad.. please keep the reviews coming….


	27. Chapter 27

In case you haven't noticed, there are a total of 28 chapters, so yeah this is the 2nd to last one

--- --- ---

Title: Instant Messenger 27/28

Author: Harmoni

Category: WWE

Rating: T for teen...cuz I like to swear hehehe

Summary: A nice messenger chat with WWE imposters becomes her way for escape. Cause that's all they were, Imposters. she wasn't that dense, she just wanted to pretend and play along cuz that's what they were doing.. Right?

Disclaimer: the OC's belong to me. wrestlers belong to the WWE and themselves, Part of the cheer is from Bring it On and the other part is from me… yes I admit it I used to be a cheerleader hides head in shame

Spoilers: Randy is suspended, and I'll prolly just make it up as I go along. I might follow some things that happen and discard the rest. My fan fic, my rules ha ha ha)

Feedback: Please tell me what you think

Author's Note: Ahem if this completely sucks, I'm blaming it on my feverish mind… I wrote this while sick. There is an explanation behind this story that I may perhaps share at a later date. I dreamed half of it but that's how a lot of my fics start...and before people go on about another Randy story…. SOOOO not my fault My Randy Muse is running rampant and SOOOO not my fault… please tell me what you honestly think it's written in 1st person which I usually don't do. And this is still unbetaed…. \

--- --- ---

"What were you doing?"

The question came so suddenly and out of nowhere, John jumped before he looked over at me and removed his headphones with a smile.

"I thought you were sleeping Princess."

I shrugged. "All I ever do is sleep."

That was true and this time, upon waking up, I saw we were the only two in my room. He was sitting with his head down and I guess some music on low as he bobbed his head to the music.

"Are you going to answer my question?" I asked.

He held up his I pod. "Just listening to music."

"That's not what I meant. Why were you on official Randy Business in Mexico? What's so important in Mexico that you weren't here."

I watched as he slowly turned his I pod off and moved closer to the bed.

"You don't know?"

"If I knew would I be asking?"

He stared hard at me, trying to gauge how much exactly I had already figured out, but I let my face remain impassive, wanting to hear it from him

"I went looking for something. Perhaps something that could help you."

I looked at him confused. "What in Mexico could possibly help me? Was there a donor down there?"

"We thought so."

I sat back in a huff, thoroughly frustrated at the lack of answers.

"Not helping." I complained.

"Oh look, my cousin, cranky, that's odd." Danni teased as she entered the room.

"Do you know why he was in Mexico?" I asked her.

She stopped and frowned. "Actually I don't."

I stared at her, a smirk coming to my face. "You're the world's worst liar."

She shrugged. "Only when it comes to you my dear, I have John so fooled."

"Hey." He cried.

"Where's Randy?" I suddenly asked.

Danni shrugged again. "Talking to someone on the phone."

"Can you get him? I really need to speak with him and John."

Suspiciously, she nodded but left the room. Randy appeared a few minutes later closing the door behind him.

"Well," I quietly said, refusing to look at either of them. "Did you find him?"

"Find who?" Randy asked.

I shook my head. "Don't play dumb with me." I pleaded. "You know damn well what I'm talking about. Did you find my father?"

"How did you…?" Randy trailed off and nudged John who shrugged.

"Thought you didn't know why I was down there, Princess."

"It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out why you were in Mexico John, I just wanted you to confirm it. I may despise my father and not keep contact with him but that doesn't mean I don't overhear mom and Auntie Kay talking. I know he lives in Mexico. Last I heard he ran some brothel down there. Did you find him and what did he say?"

There was silence and I finally looked up to see John and Randy look back at me, appearing to had just finished a silent conversation.

"I looked but I couldn't find him."

As much as I hated my father, as much as I never wanted contact with him, a small part of me hoped that maybe, just maybe, he would come to my rescue. He'd show up and do something decent in his life, because miraculously, he'd be the perfect bone marrow match for me.

But I should've known better. This wasn't some fairytale where a miracle would happen, save me, and I'd live happily ever after with Randy, our dog, our white picket fence and 2.5 children. I would get none of that now.

"Worth a shot though, hey?" I said with a strained smile.

Randy grabbed my hand. "Don't worry sweetheart we'll find someone. Lots of wrestlers and their family are getting tested. They want to help us."

I sighed and looked away, touched by what he just said. This wasn't just my problem anymore, according to him, it was ours. He was in this, and he prayed someone would be there to help _us _out.

"Damn." I heard John whisper.

I turned to him a puzzled expression on my face. "What's up?"

He shook his head. "nothin' I just remembered somethin', I'll talk to you guys later."

He left the room, leaving behind me and Randy. I moved over and he moved in beside me, putting his arms around me. I moved my head to his chest, sighing in content.

"I wish I could make this go away." He hoarsely said.

I nodded. "Me too. I wish it were that easy."

He kissed my forehead and I looked up at him.

"But why sit here and wish for something when we know it can't happen?" I quietly asked. "Can't we be happy with what time we have?"

"Marry me?" He asked.

My jaw dropped in shock.

"What? No. Are you insane?"

"No. Anything but. Lana I love you."

I sighed and pulled back slightly. "Randy I love you too, but I'm not going to marry you only to widow you."

"You think I care about that?"

"I do. It's not fair to you. This isn't some movie or book where we get married and I'm magically cured and we live happily ever after. This is real life Randy and as much as nobody wants this, I'm dying."

He kissed the tears that had escaped my eyes.

"Until that moment when you slip away from me Lans, I'm not going to give up, and if that miracle comes, then will you marry me?"

I sighed and stared into his eyes. Why was he not letting go? This would just be harder on him in the end. But as I looked at him, the words to say just that couldn't come out. Instead I nodded, laying my head back down on his chest.

At least he had something to hold onto.

--- --- ---

Time no longer held meaning. Seconds melted into minutes, minutes to hours, hours to days and so forth. And each day I grew weaker. Had it been all that long since I talked to Randy about the ludicrous idea of marriage. Or had it only been days, perhaps it was yesterday. I no longer knew. All I knew was I was growing sicker and that I no longer have much time left.

I asked mom to call Krista and Jen who arrived and when I spoke with them, I let them know that I didn't have much time. There were tears as they begged me not to say that but I told them that I was just stating the facts. I could feel my life slipping away and I hated it. But I begged them to keep in contact with Danni, Randy and John. Danni had John and I knew would be okay but I begged them to look after Randy. I knew this would be too difficult. I asked them to keep my online wrestling groups going in my honor and to post all the crazy graphics I did. I handed my laptop over to Jen which contained everything I have done wrestling wise. After we cried together and they promised to stay nearby.

I worried so much about my mom. For so long I was her world and although she had Danni and Auntie Kay, I couldn't help but worry what would happen to her once I was gone. Not knowing who to speak to, I decided on John. Out of everyone, for whatever reason, he seemed the most understanding about what was going on and he promised to look after my mom.

"I don't want to die." I whispered to him one afternoon.

He gave me a small smile. "I doubt anyone really does. But no one deserves to live like this Lana. You're confined to your bed, so strung out on Morphine, it's a wonder you're still coherent."

I smiled back. "You called me Lana."

"Is that bad?"

I shook my head. "It saddens me more then anything, it makes it all seems so much more closer."

"You'll be okay, we will be to. I'll look after everyone for you."

I squeezed his hand. "I know. But it still doesn't make it easier. I'm only 22. But so many others die so much younger should I really feel guilty?"

"Why not? You're still young. Your whole life should still be ahead of you. It ain't fair, but we can't change it."

"When did you become so smart?"

He shrugged. "I've always been smart, people just think I'm not."

I raised an eyebrow at him. "Couldn't be because you hide it so well could it?"

"Maybe." He laughed.

I sighed and closed my eyes, getting comfortable on the bed.

"One more thing" I whispered.

He leaned closer so he could hear me.

"I don't want it to be sad."

"What?" he asked.

"My funeral, it should be happy. My last one was sad."

I opened my eyes to see him staring at me oddly.

"morphine." He mumbled.

I smiled. "No a dream. Tell- tell Danni and Mom I love them kay? Tell Randy I love him too and it's okay to move on."

"What? No. Not now. Lana, not this soon."

I sighed. "it's time John. And you know what? I love you too, you'vbeen great."

"How do you know?"

"I can feel it. I'm gonna go to sleep now and I won't wake up."

"Do you want me to get everyone?" I looked to see the tears shining in his eyes but I couldn't stop them, I could feel myself slowly slipping away.

"No…this is… fine…Shine on…love you…all."

I closed my eyes one last time, knowing this would be the last time and I would never wake up.

--- --- ---


	28. Chapter 28

This is the end and much longer then any other ones so have fun :D

And can I just laugh at the ppl who didn't read my last author note and thought the last chappie was the end?

Am I that evil? Wait yes I am but I couldn't end it like that… this whole story ahs been wonderful and I loved writing it and I thank you all for reading it, it means a lot that so many have reviewed… this whole story ahs been one emotional roller coaster and some chapters harder to write then others but you know what? I'm very proud of it… so here enjoy the last chapter…

--- --- ---

Title: Instant Messenger 28/28

Author: Harmoni

Category: WWE

Rating: T for teen...cuz I like to swear hehehe

Summary: A nice messenger chat with WWE imposters becomes her way for escape. Cause that's all they were, Imposters. she wasn't that dense, she just wanted to pretend and play along cuz that's what they were doing.. Right?

Disclaimer: the OC's belong to me. wrestlers belong to the WWE and themselves, Part of the cheer is from Bring it On and the other part is from me… yes I admit it I used to be a cheerleader hides head in shame

Spoilers: Randy is suspended, and I'll prolly just make it up as I go along. I might follow some things that happen and discard the rest. My fan fic, my rules ha ha ha)

Feedback: Please tell me what you think

Author's Note: Ahem if this completely sucks, I'm blaming it on my feverish mind… I wrote this while sick. There is an explanation behind this story that I may perhaps share at a later date. I dreamed half of it but that's how a lot of my fics start...and before people go on about another Randy story…. SOOOO not my fault My Randy Muse is running rampant and SOOOO not my fault… please tell me what you honestly think it's written in 1st person which I usually don't do. And this is still unbetaed…. \

--- --- ---

Whiteness. Everywhere whiteness. It hurt, it burned. I closed my eyes again before slowly opening them and staring around.

Why is white associated with death and heaven and after life. I hate white. Why couldn't everything be black or red or blue.

I halted my thought, hoping no one or nothing could hear me, I didn't want to end up in hell.

I stopped again, wondering why I even cared. How did I know I was in heaven? How could I be there if I didn't believe in heaven? Which would mean I didn't believe in hell. So who cares what I was thinking.

Yup and there I go babbling in my own mind again.

Sitting up, I looked around, realizing that I wasn't in heaven or hell or anything. I was in my own bed, staring at m ceiling. All machines were gone, and it was bright. So frigging bright that I silently cursed, wondering what the hell was going on? If I was dead why was I in my bed surrounded by so much light? Was this perhaps a dream?

Was everything just a dream?

I quickly got up and walked out of my room.

"Mom?" I cautiously called.

"Yes baby?"

I gasped, stepping into the living room, surprised she could hear me.

"Where's Randy, what happened?" Was I not dead? I silently asked myself.

She looked up from her crocheting, a confused look on her face. "you've slept till noon again is what happened. Who's Randy?"

"My boyfriend?"

She shook her head. "Honey are you okay? You don't have a boyfriend."

I spun around and ran back to my room. "Where's my laptop?" I called frantically searching for it.

"Princess, you don't have a laptop." My mom said following me in.

"Yes I do. Oh my god, that's right I gave it to Jen."

She stepped forward to feel my head, a small frown on her face. I pulled away.

"I feel fine. Wait, I feel fine. Momma am I all better?"

"When were you sick?"

I sat down on my bed. "Was I…Did I not have cancer?"

My mother frowned, beginning to look really worried. "No, you didn't, did you have a bad dream?"

I frowned as well and looked down. "Yeah, it was just a dream."

Was that all this whole thing had been. Some sick cruel dream? Possibly but something didn't let me believe it.

"Don't worry about me momma. Must've been some dream, I'm just gonna shower."

"Okay but don't be too long, Danni will be by soon to take you to that wrestling show you like so much."

Her words didn't even register until she had left and I looked up again, my eyes falling on a pink and black cell phone. The exact one I got rid of when I was sick.

I picked it up and dialed a number I knew by heart.

"_Hello?"_

My heart almost stopped. If it had been a dream how did I know his number?

"Ra-Randy?"

"_Yeah, who's this?"_

"It's me, it's Lana."

There was silence, then,

"_Oh hey Lana, how you doing?"_

I breathed a sigh of relief. "OH my god, it wasn't a dream, you remember me."

"_Sorry but not so much, did we meet at a club. Hey were you that hot chick from two nights ago? The blonde who wanted to come back with me and the other blonde but your boyfriend dragged you away? Cause girl, you missed one crazy night."_

I blinked back the tears as I listened to him talk about other girls. "No Randy." I whispered. "This is Lana, the redhead you met online."

"_When would I have the time to go online? Who is this and how did you get my number?"_

"I don't know, I just knew it, my mistake."

I hung up the phone and threw myself back across my bed and that was where Danni found me not too much later.

"Get your lazy ass up and let's go." She huffed.

"Was I sick?"

"No."

"I didn't have cancer?"

"No what's wrong with you?"

"I didn't meet Randy and John and we weren't DX cheerleaders on TV?"

"Are you on crack?"

"it was a dream?" I whispered. "how? Why? What could be so cruel?"

"Are you feeling okay?"

I shook my head. "Do I have to go?"

"Yes. We paid a bundle for these now get up."

I sighed and stood up, quickly changing into some clothes she pulled out for me. I noticed for the first time that I was back to normal. I was curvier and my dark red hair was once more long. Sighing again as I brushed it, I resigned myself to the fact that it had all been some horrific cruel dream and followed my cousin out to her car.

We barely talked and when we got to the arena I followed her to our seats, somehow not all that surprised that they were front row. For some reason I just couldn't get into it, even when the main event of Orton vs. Cena appeared. In fact I wanted to cry when Randy first came out and then when John did and walked by us, he placed a hat on my head.

"Cheer up there Princess, or your face will get stuck like that."

I gasped, more confused then ever until someone grabbed the hat off my head. I spun around right into Skanky McSkank, somehow not all that surprised she was there.

"You think he meant this for you?" She snarled.

I screeched, my anger and frustration coming out as I jumped at her, tackling her to the ground.

She screamed yelling at me to get off of her. Off to the side, I heard my cousin chuckle and the arena cheering, but not for Randy and John for me and the Skank.

"Of course he meant it for me you stupid bitch and no way in hell am I letting you get away with this twice."

I felt someone pick me up then I was passed off to someone else before I was pulled over the barrier.

"Perhaps you should be the one in the ring."

I growled, once more trying to jump the barrier but whoever was holding me had a firm grip on me.

"Hey, I'm Danni and the crazy one is Lana."

"AS in the Lana that called me earlier?"

I pulled away and fixed my hair. "not my fault everything is completely fucked up." I muttered.

"You look familiar." I heard John say.

"Finally someone who remembers me." I spun around to face John. "Tell me you know me."

"I can't say from where" He mused, "but you look so familiar."

I doubled over clutching at my hip.

"Did you hurt yourself?" Danni asked.

"No, there's just this awful pain in my hip."

"You too?" she said.

"What?" I looked up to see John holding his hip as well.

"This can't be good." we muttered, staring intently at each other as we tried to get away from the pain, but it became too much and I blacked out.

--- --- ---

When I woke up again, I was in my room, but this time, the machines were there but were turned off, looking ready to be moved out. More confused then ever, I scrambled out of bed and ran into the front room but it was empty. I ran to my mothers room and stopped short when I saw her sitting on the bed, her head in her hands.

Now this was better. Okay that sounded wrong. This wasn't better but at least I knew I wasn't losing my mind.

"momma?" I whispered. But I wasn't surprised that she didn't answer.

I watched as she continued crying, and I was heartbroken that I couldn't comfort her. Finally she stood up and moved over to her dresser, slipping on some earrings as she wiped away her tears, dressed all in black.

No, no way, I didn't want to be around for my funeral again.

"everyone's almost ready." I turned to see Auntie Kay at the door, her eyes red as well.

"That bastard." My mother spat. "Her whole life and I've asked him for nothing and he couldn't even do this one thing for her."

Auntie Kay nodded as she stepped inside, putting an arm around my mom. "I'm sorry Kim, if there was anything I could've done…."

My mom just nodded as she let my aunt lead her out.

I watched them go before following them into the living room, moving past them to go into the dining room where my cousin was, mindlessly toying with the place mats. Her eyes were red as well but she looked angry.

"I don't want to go." She muttered. "It's not fair, it's not right."

"I know it's not. But if you don't go, think how upset she would be."

I turned to see Krista and Jen across from here.

Danni sighed. "I'll go. I'm just- this isn't- it shouldn't have been her time. We had so much to do."

"Maybe you could help us." Jen whispered. "She gave me her laptop and asked us to keep her groups going. We would like you to be in there and help us I know she'd want that."

Danni looked at her, a sad smile tugging at the corner of her lips. "When you guys go back, call me, maybe I will."

I left them there and went down the hall, back to my room where I could hear a voice. I went in to see Randy there, holding my favorite stuffed animal as he stared at my bed.

"This isn't right, Lans. You should still be here, happy and healthy, I'm sorry we couldn't find anybody. I'm sorry I failed you."

"You didn't fail me." I whispered, knowing he couldn't hear me.

"I really did want to marry you. Sick or not I would've asked you. You were it for me Lana. I can't say how I knew, I just did. I knew it before I had actually met you and that kiss we had, even if you did slap me, I knew you were it. I know you told me to move on but I don't know how I can. How I'm supposed to."

"Randy, we're leaving now." John said, stopping in the doorway.

Randy nodded and as he stepped out, John turned to me.

"You comin'?"

My mouth dropped but before I could say anything, I heard Randy ask who he was talking to. John left my room as he answered Randy and I quickly ran after them, getting into Auntie Kay's minivan. I was in the trunk and was therefore unable to say anything to John, who seemed to be ignoring me now anyhow.

When we arrived to the graveyard, I moved up beside John.

"John." I hissed.

He looked over at me, flashing me one of his famous smiles. I stopped in my tracks, watching them walk away before I quickly ran after him.

"How can you see me?" I asked him.

He fell back a bit so no one could hear him. "I don't know, you tell me."

"What?"

"Your dream, isn't it?"

"Dream? Dude, I'm dead."

"Are you?" He asked with a frown.

"aren't you going to my funeral?"

He looked around, "I guess I am."

"I'm so confused."

"Actually so am I. Thought it was my dream, but I have a feelin' it's yours."

"Why?" I asked. "John. I'm dead."

"are you?" he asked again.

I blew out a frustrated breath.

"What are you doing John?"

He stopped and looked at me. "To be honest Princess, I don't know. I just remember being put under."

"Put under what?"

"John." Danni called.

I grabbed his arm. "please, I can't go through this again."

"John, who are you talking to?" Danni asked.

"What am I supposed to do Princess?"

"Don't leave me."

"They're waiting for me."

"You're the only one who can see me. I can't go through this. How am I supposed to just exist?"

He pulled me into a hug. "You won't Lana. You'll never just exist."

"I am right now." I sobbed. "I'll never be able to touch anyone, or talk to anyone or anything."

"You are right now." He gently reminded me.

I looked up at him, my eyes pleading with him not to leave me. "I can't exist. I don't want to."

He grabbed my arms and looked down into my eyes. "Stop it Lana. Just stop it. This isn't going to end like this. I don't know why the hell I'm here in your messed up dream but just drop it. Wake up already."

"What?" I whispered.

"This is a dream. Just wake up."

"I died."

"No you didn't?"

"Didn't I? How do you know?"

"Would I be talking to you?"

"I want to live." I whispered.

"Then live." He told me.

"Help me." I begged. "please John you can't leave me. I need you. You've been my rock through all this, you can't leave me" I grabbed his face, moving to kiss him on his cheek, instead he moved so our lips briefly connected.

My eyes shot open as I pulled away.

"What was…?"

"Don't you get it Lana? I'm not goin' to leave you. We're connected."

He grasped my hand, interlocking our fingers together. "We're always goin' to be connected. I'm always goin' to be with you."

I stared at him confused

"Wake up." He commanded me, squeezing my hand. "You have to wake up Lana."

I closed my eyes and suddenly was overwhelmed by pain. I gasped as I heard murmuring around me.

"She's awake."

"Oh my god, he is too."

Who? I silently asked myself.

"Wha…" I gasped out before swallowing, my mouth was so dry

"Baby you shouldn't talk yet." Randy whispered, smoothing back my hair as he placed a kiss on my forehead. "You were in a coma but a donor was found and you were saved."

"Is she…?" I heard John's strained voice.

I turned my head to see him on the bed beside me, looking like he had just woken up from surgery but why would he have- then it hit me.

"You saved me." I whispered. I wasn't just talking about the Bone Marrow, yes he had given me a second chance at life but if he hadn't of been there I never would have known it was a dream, that my physical body was waiting for me. So what was that kiss, unless he really had no clue about that.

Lifting his hand, John reached over and I slowly lifted my hand to his, he interlocked our fingers.

"We're connected Lana. I'm always goin' to be here for you. Me an' you, we're in this together."

I gave him a weak smile but I knew whether or not he was aware of that kiss or what he had done for me in my dream, everything was going to change.

We were connected now and I somehow knew everything would be different.

--- --- ---

this one took longer to get out and it was just cause of tat last part….I needed to set the mood for the next part of the story cuz yes , there will be a sequel, don't expect it right away I'm gonna work on some older stories which I hope you all read as well…. Thanks for all the support


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